vent
honestly i need a good vent. life sucks alottt rn. some reason the only humor that people around me have always have to be about me being flat. even my best friend's family does it and im never the one laughing. yeah im skinny and flat but i cant do much about it really..? my friend seems to think its the funniest thing in the world. every day its brought up 'your like my resume.. flat" or "atleast im not flat '" or her little sister whos like 9 by the way always says "wel youre flat" every chance she gets. not to mention im dealing with alot of self hate right now and it sucks that i cant tell them about it. DONT EVEN GET ME STARTEDD ON SCHOOL. im usualy fine with tests and stuff but why is it that teachers lay it ALLL on us the LAST WEEK. then my acne comes back after ONE ROUND OF ACCUTANE. I switched derms on accidnet (dont ask bc i dont know either..) and shes convinced it will clear with tretinoin after i told her MULTPLE TIMES i have tried it MULTIPLE TIMES and it NEVER WORKED. accutane worked for me and my old derm said if it came back after 1 round we'd do another. i promise you i can speak clear english and it is not difficult to understand that only accutane has worked on my skin. tretinoin didnt work, benzoyl peroxide, minocyclin or whatever that is, no stupid 900 dollar aklief cream works. and mind you IM PAYING THIS LADY 80 DOLLARS TO TALK TO ME FOR 10 MINUTES GOLLLYYY
@powerfulOak1143
That sounds exhausting. Being treated like the punchline for something about your body, while also dealing with acne, self-hate, and feeling unheard by your dermatologist, sounds really frustrating and lonely. You don’t deserve to be mocked or dismissed. I’m here to listen if you want to vent more — what part of this has been hurting the most lately?
@powerfulOak1143
That really does sound draining. When people keep making the same joke about you over and over, it stops being a joke and just starts feeling mean. And everything else; the jokes, the school stress, the skin stuff, it makes sense that it’s wearing you down.
You’re not being dramatic, you’re just tired because it’s actually been a lot. I’m glad you said it instead of keeping it all in. 💛
That's really horrible to go through,you're very strong!! Thank you for opening up. It's no wonder why you are feeling self-hate in such situation,you have so many reasons...):
And it's indeed unfair to get called "flat" all the time,when you can't even control it. But please don't let negative comments on your looks get to you: beauty comes in different forms,and to be beautiful you don't need to fit specific standards. If everyone looked the same way and had more prominent curves,the world would be boring. You make it special and different,you're a limited edition person,you're the colorful flower among black and white ones—I know it's really hard to ignore all of this,and you don't have to. You're already really tough to just stay there and listen to people laugh about your looks,without being able to do anything.
And about school,that seems pretty stressful. Laying everything on the last week is so heavy and hard to go through!!! It's like a break in your rhythm,where you suddently have to overwork yourself. How do you handle tests,do you suddently have to study all day?😨
About your doctor,it's really sad to go there,pay so much and feel frustrated afterwards. Perhaps do you think that the doctor understood you but is ignoring you on purpose,or do they know that this medicine is better for long term healing?
@Ednamius thank you sooo much for your understanding. ive gotten alot better since summer break started. and with my acne, im not so frusterated about it now, since ive had it for years even though im still a teen. Accutane is a very harsh medicine so i understand my derm trying to go around it, but im seeing her soon so hopeflly i can cut to it and start on it again since its worked ebst for me so i think i just cut myself off it too early which sucked but oh well.
Woosh!!! I'm seriously feeling for you. Does the "flat" their talking about include being quite quiet? If it is,I can understand you there too!❤️
