Self Harm Recovery Daily Check-in : Sunday, August 30th, 2020
Hello there beautiful beings <3
The week is coming to an end once again ! Personally I'm happy for the week to end as I'm on vacation for 2 weeks :)
Today I wanted to share a quote with you : We are very, very small, but we are profoundly capable of very, very big things. - Stephen Hawking
It's nice now and again to remind ourselves that we are capable of so much. Even in darker times when things are unsure and foggy, we still have ressources in ourselves in order to make things change. So whoever you are reading this, well done for being you and I believe in you no matter where you are or where you're going. Congratulations on being a beautiful person, keep up the good work <3
Check in questions :
1) How are you doing today ? Anything that you'd like to share ?
2) What is one thing you are capable of doing ? It can be anything from changing your lifestyle, moving house, picking up a new hobby to more simple things like getting a good night sleep or washing the dishes.
3) What is one (or more) of your strengths ?
Song recommendation of the day : Come back home by ONEUS.
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@Slizzy564
I'm not doing well. There have been too many almost relapses for me this year. Things have been extremely hard.
I told my sister about my breakup that happened back in march and of course she was being insensitive and made things all about her like she always does. I'm dealing with that and i haven't yet grieved for my uncle who i lost a week before father's day. My sister said some pretty hurtful things and i feel so angry. She basically invalidated my relationship and said it wasn't real because my gf and i were long distance. She was mad i didn't tell her but she didn't tell us she had a bf until the end of march, and yes i was the last to find out she had a bf. I thought this whole time she was gone she had gotten back with her on again/off again gf of 10 yrs but she didn't. She had moved in with her bf and that's pretty much what happened. She also still invalidates my sexuality which has still been taking a while for me to get used to.
One thing i know i can do is register for my science classes in the spring. I'm doing a medical post bacc at a local community college. I'm also trying to find a job as a psychiatric technician.
A few of my best strengths is that i am a hard worker, i am driven and ambitious, i am good at cooking and baking and i am resilient.
@BrokenAngelxx
Hi there sweetheart. I'm sorry to hear that you've not been doing well lately. Indeed a lot of things seemed to have happened resulting in many emotions to deal with. This has been said before but I'll say it again, relapses are part of recovery. As much as they're not always seen as a positive way of moving on, they're still part of your journey. I hope that from one relapse to an other, you can see how you've changed, maybe grown and how things could be different this time round.
I'm sorry to hear about your breakup, those are difficult times indeed, moving on from having someone to being alone. I'm also sorry that you didn't get the support you expected from your sister. Sounds like she was pretty self centered during your conversation(s). Long distance relationships are still relationships. Sadly some people don't realize that they do exactly the same thing they're accusing you of. I hope that you manage to talk things out with her and get these emotions out of your system. Dealing with your sexuality, feeling validated and courageous enough to talk about it are all things that are hard to do peacefully at all times. I can relate with you on that one. Losing your uncle just before father's day is a tough one too, I'm sorry to hear about that. Though grieving takes it's own time, some people are fast and some slower, feel free to take all the time that you need, nobody goes at the same pace <3
Oh your studies sound interesting !! What do a psychiatric technician do ? I never heard of that before. I'm glad to hear that you have projects for all of this. Good luck with your classes !
These seem like very good strenghts to have. I admire people with ambition that don't hesitate to put in those extra hours of work. Cooking and baking sound so cool ! What's your favorite dish ? :)
Thanks for checking-in with us, sending hugs your way, take care <3
@Slizzy564
A psychiatric technician checks people's vitals and helps with feeding bathing and tolieting. I eventually would like to become a psychiatrist so this would be a step towards working in the medical field.
My favorite dishes are anything italian really but i also love homemade scalloped potatoes, cheeseburger quesadillas and chili and baked ziti. I have a huge sweet tooth as well but i hate pumpkin flavored foods and drinks and i also hate spicy foods and seafood
My family and i still have not spoken about my sexuality other than when i came out as panromantic ace we haven't had a single convo about it with them and its making me have mixed emotions about it
@BrokenAngelxx
Oh right ! That sounds like a very demanding job, I guess it's not easy everyday but it must be rewarding when you see someone making progress ! I hope that you manage to become a psychiatrist, good luck <3
Al these dishs sound delicious !! :) Makes me hungry actually x) Just like you I have a sweet tooth and dislike spicy stuff !
You're so brave to come out to them ! That must have been an emotional experience for you. I can understand that them completely ignoring this subject must be hard for you. Is it something that you'd like to talk about with them ?
@Slizzy564
If it ends badly again, I'm not sure how i would handle it. I've been looking at other people's coming out stories on YouTube but I'm just not sure how to approach the convo with them and I'm honestly nervous about it all. Maybe i should've waited until i moved out to say something bc I'd at least have my own place ahould things go left.
When i told them about my depression and the cutting a few years ago the reaction was just as bad as when i came out so i don't know what to do anymore and i don't have anyone to talk to about it. I wish i had some lgbt friends to give me some advice on this but i don't and I'm feeling really emotional and overwhelmed.
@BrokenAngelxx
Oh I'm sorry to hear that you think it'll turn out bad, it must be hard to not be able to talk about whatever you want with them. I totally understand you being nervous around them, it seems like a pretty logical reaction given your situation. As for looking at other people's stories, I hope that you find some help in there, even if everyone's story and experience is different. Also I get that at least having your own place would give you somewhere to go to if the conversation doesn't go well. I take it you still live with them ?
It's not always easy explaining these issues to someone who has never been through this kind of stuff before, especially since there's a lot of stigma around these topics .. As frustrating as it is for you, it can also be hard for them to understand. This seems to be a very disorientating situation for you and I'm sorry to hear that you're lost as to how to deal with it. I don't know who you'd like to talk with but there's a lgbt community here on 7cups, maybe you could find some support there ? Here's the link. Or else you could try to connect with a listener ? And if need be, you can always find me on the forums here ! I'm not an expert on coming out and all that but I can listen to what you have to say !
Sending some hugs your way if you want them <3 I wish for calmer days ahead for you, hang in there ! <3
I am doing okay today so far but I literally just woke up haha. I'd like to share that my friends are going back to school today!
I am capable of reading several books in one day. So far the grand total is three in one day but that was in one evening really......
One of my strengths is trying to be understanding. I try to be understanding and give people the benefit of the doubt.
@memelord500
Hey there :)
Haha well waking up with a positive mindset is always a good start to the day :) I guess a lot of people will be going back to school over the next week, will you be going back with them ?
Ah yes a fellow bookworm ! I love getting through books in only one day, though I try to limit myself to one book a day ! What are you reading at the moment ?
Fantastic ! I wish there were more understanding people on this planet, it's a strength that is soooo useful, just being able to take that step back and see the world through someone else's point of view !
Thanks for checking in, take care <3
@Slizzy564
I'm going back next week! Unfortunately I'm starting college ahead of them, so we'll be in different schools.
At the moment I'm rereading Jennifer Niven's book, All The Bright Places, absolute sob fest but it's great, highly recommend!
@memelord500
I'm sorry to hear that you'll be in different schools, hopefully you'll be able to keep contact :)
Oh I never heard of it, what's it about ? :)
@Slizzy564
Yeah, we have weekly coffee meetings and we plan to do study group together despite the different subjects!
It's about a girl and a boy, Violet and Finch, and their relationship. But he's got bi-polar and she's recently lost her sister in a car accident. They meet on top of the bell tower, and then it's a story about them trying to get better together and then falling in love, but it's so sad haha. I'm on 1984 though now, finished All The Bright Places the other night.
@memelord500
That sounds great ! Very good way to keep contact even though you won't be seeing each other everyday :)
Sounds interesting, though I have to admit it's not really my cup of tea ;) I always heard good reviews of 1984 but never actually read it x)
Hello everyone!!
Hi Slizzy! It
@Hydrangea03
Hey hey ! It's good to see you too ! Sorry for the delayed reply <3
Taking a break is a very healthy thing to do, sometimes we're too focused on our routine, changing it up now and again can't hurt. I'm sorry to hear that you've been feeling melancholic, anything that has triggered this emotion ? Also is this a good busy or a bad busy that you're talking about ?
Holding one and hanging in there is proof of your strength and strong will ! If your hands and arms get tired, we're here to help you if need be :) <3
Aaah curiosity is a good one ! I love people who ask a lot of questions :) Is there anything that you're curious about ? A subject or topic that you like researching on ?
Thanks sweetie, hope you're taking care of yourself too, thank you for checking in <3
Hey there!
1) How are you doing today ? Anything that you'd like to share ?
Good. I'd share that I answered two daily-check ins backward starting from August 31 to August 30. Even though it's September in my home. HAHA! I love doing things in reverse.
2) What is one thing you are capable of doing ? It can be anything from changing your lifestyle, moving house, picking up a new hobby to more simple things like getting a good night sleep or washing the dishes.
Do you know the feeling of desperation where you want to get the things you want? I'm capable of manipulating something or someone to get what I want. Though, I try to control my impulse to avoid trouble by giving up. x) It's the reason why I usually set easy goals.
3) What is one (or more) of your strengths ?
Strengths?!? I'm quiet, and that helps me avoid a lot of school dramas before. I consider myself a good liar that is another useful skill that aids in getting the results I want. Don't worry. I try my best to avoid lying in these check-ins because it helps me a lot.
Thanks for reading!
@LovelyOrangeJuice
Hello hello :)
I'm glad to hear that you're doing well ! Haha it doesn't matter if you answer in reverse, as long as it's helps you/you enjoy it, who cares if you're time traveling ;)
Oh so someone who is pretty goal driven ? You like to acheive your goals, even if they're small ones ? I'm not quite sure because of the way you worded your answer, do you think of this as something positive or negative ?
Oh I used to avoid the school drama at all costs ! I suppose being quiet helps with that. Also I tend to think that quiet people observe others a lot more, or maybe that's just me projecting .. ? I suppose being a good liar means that you know how to identify the right information you need/give to others. In a way it shows your communication skills ! As for you lying in these check ins, I'm not worried, you can share what you want/don't want. I glad to hear that they help you out :)
Thanks for checking in, take care <3
@Slizzy564
Heya! Thanks for the reply.
For me, being goal-driven is neutral because my goal sometimes is a positive or negative thing.
I do think that the quiet type does observe more, but at the same time, it depends. Sometimes, those who are silent are daydreaming rather than watching the whole show.
I don't think that I'm also good at communication because most of my relationships with other people doesn't even last. I felt that they are just acquaintances rather than friends. So, I'm starting to wonder how a real long-term friendship feels. It must be good.
Thanks for reading.
