Self-Harm Recovery Daily Checkin: Thursday May 14, 2020
Boredom. It seems to be a word that gets thrown around on the daily nowadays. How to cure boredom? What do we do when were just stuck at home? I cant cope with the boredom so I self-harm. I self-harm because Ive got nothing else to do. How do I cope when everything is BORING?
So many questions, but this time, so much time to answer them! :p boredom can be cause for self-harm for many people, myself included before. When youre bored, people tend to get stuck in their minds and self-harm from triggering memories or negative thoughts. Other times, you really dont think theres anything to do, so self-harm is an activity that you can engage in and be able to DO something.
So, what do we do? Prevention is better than cure, so preventing boredom is so much better. Personally, I make a list or find a list of random things to do so when boredom strikes, I can find something. My aim is to do each activity at least once! And Ive got a LONG list... another idea would be to structure your day and set time limits for each activity. Sort of like calendar blocking.
In saying all of this, lets answer some questions related to it!
1. How are you today? Is there anything you'd like to share?
2. What are your ways in dealing with boredom without resorting to self-harm?
3. How does your usual day look? Would you like to change it? Why or why not?
4. What are some unique things you'd suggest others to do when they're bored?
Take care of yourselves and stay safe everyone. ❤️
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@rebecca947
1. How are you today? Is there anything you'd like to share?
I have had a good day. I talked about my ED for the first time with my new contactperson, and it was ok. I mean don't like talking about my ED, but it's ok. She seemed like she was genuinly interested in getting me help, so that's good right? She wanted to find an ED center for and with me that would help me, and that kinda made me happy. She is going to help me find a therapist, who actually knows anything about EDs and how to treat them, so that's good right?
I have been at my grandmas' today too, and I realized that I haven't self harmed for two month, roughly, right now! I don't know, but it just makes me happy. I have come to a point where I have understood that self harming to punish myself for eating doesn't do anything good for me, so Imma just try to not do that. And bc I'm not living with my parents anymore and don't fight with them, I don't self harm bc I'm a bad daughter anymore either. So that's also good.
2. What are your ways in dealing with boredom without resorting to self-harm?
There is, really. Take up a new hobby, learn a new skill, whatever really that isn't self harm. If I feel bored a quick nap can do something that self harm can't. It makes me feel more fresh and awake, and that makes me feel happy, even though I know that I shouldn't just nap every time I feel bored. I should do other stuff, and that's cool too. I just do stuff like write on my stories, go through pinterest to find inspiration to draw something and that's really exciting! I love just looking at stuff, and make a drawing of it.
3. How does your usual day look? Would you like to change it? Why or why not?
Normally I wake up at 9 or 10, and then I will try to eat something or I skip. Then I sit with my laptop for a few hours, and then I go for a bikeride. After my bikeride I sit with my laptop again, trying to get some writing done. Then I go for a walk, and when I come back from that it's time for making dinner. These days I watch Family by the Ton, when I eat. Then it's 8 o'clock and I watch Harry Potter (trying to finish all the movies this week), and then I go back to my laptop to write a little on my stories again or draw, and then I go to bed.
I like my daily rutine a lot, and Imma do this for a while. I like it that way. I like working out and if I should add anything that would be earlier bikeride and walk, so I could go to the gym at four, when the gyms open up again. I like to keep busy :)
4. What are some unique things you'd suggest others to do when they're bored?
Not self harm, lol. No seriously! Don't self harm bc you are bored. It's stupid.
@EvilRegalsReadToo
Hello, Regals! That is amazing, I am so proud of you! ❤️ It takes so much courage and trust to be able to open up to a new contact person about a vulnerable part of ourselves. Im so glad it went ok, and theyre doing amazing in helping you. Everything you said theyre doing is great and very ok. I really hope you get the help you want and deserve. And omg, congratulations for being self-harm free for so long! Im glad you moved environments (I think Ive said that before, just reaffirming it!) and youre starting to understand your thought process. Youre doing so well.
That is a very good suggestion- sometimes a nap can really help. It helps you to do something and to get your brain off it. It also shuts that train of thought down, and when you wake up, sometimes you feel better. Pinterest is amazing. New hobbies and skills can be super fun and motivating to do as well for sure.
It sounds like youre getting physical activity in every day, which is good. Keep it in moderation. Ive never heard of Family by the Ton- is it on Netflix and how is it? And how many HP movies do you have left to watch? Aha we love a movie marathon! I hope your stories are going well? Keeping busy is a great way to void off boredom.
Heres to hoping your week continues to be ok or get better! Thank you for taking time to check in with us ❤️
@rebecca947 It's on Discovery, TLC, but you can watch it on Youtube too :)
I have the last two left! They are well yeah. I'm currently doing chapter descriptions for my next story, so everything is well :)
@rebecca947
1. How are you today? Is there anything you'd like to share? I am doing pretty well today. Have had my counsellor checking in on me every couple of weeks now by phone which has helped a lot. Before I was only having face-to-face sessions about once a month which was good but I think I need more frequent check-ins.
2. What are your ways in dealing with boredom without resorting to self-harm? I have pulled out my colouring books, found some books I haven't read in a while, started playing my Nintendo DS games again, and I also knit and crochet so sometimes make things for gift giving later.
3. How does your usual day look? Would you like to change it? Why or why not? Right now my day starts by feeding my cats and rats, then myself. I log into work (medical transcriptionist) and try to focus on work for a few hours at a time (goal is to have the number of minutes I want completed before hubby gets home from his job). After that it is a free for all in regard to my time. Usually if I'm done work before 5 PM I will help make dinner and then we just sit around, sometimes smoke some weed and watch TV.
4. What are some unique things you'd suggest others to do when they're bored? Hmmmm...I'm usually not good with suggestions. Not really unique but finding time to do a quick workout or dance video helps to break the boredom. Drawing, colouring, knitting, learn a new skill.
Hope everyone has a good day 
@wittyEyes6543
Hello, Eyes! Its good to know what you think you need- I wonder if youve thought about bringing it up with your counsellor to see if it can happen? Its your session and your time.
Colouring books- I love them! I love how prepared you are and proactive in making gifts for later! I would love to take up knitting and crocheting, it looks really relaxing and gets you in the mode.
I like how you set yourself a personal goal when it comes to working from home! Im curious if you have a log off time for work, or you can log off whenever you choose? :o it sounds like the latter, which is why Im asking! It sounds like a relaxing time. What are your cats and rats names?
Dance videos can be great, thats my form of exercise if Im not in the mood for a hard workout. Take good care of yourself!
@rebecca947
Hi Rebecca, I have not approached my counsellor about the frequency of visits just yet (she has me doing a some DBT and CBT training sheets which also keeps me focused and gives me something to do).
Knitting I find to be both frustrating and relaxing (frustrating when I notice a mistake 3 rows back, but can get in a groove for sure). I have a family with warm hands, feet and heads as I tend to make gloves, socks, hats and blankets mostly. YouTube is my friend when it comes to knitting and crochet skills.
My work time is pretty flexible. If I get frustrated now I can just log out and leave whereas my jobs before forced me to go to the washroom to get away from what was frustrating me. I do not have a set end time but do try not to work past 7 PM even if I am short a bit on the number of minutes I have, as that is about 12 hours of screen time for work (some I will admit is surfing when I should be working).
Our cats are Thumper (she is mostly grey with some calico markings), Salem (looks like he sounds, like Sabrina's cat). As for my ratty boys I have B.B. (we called him Bowl Boy when we were picking him out of the litter as he was sitting on a bowl and looking cute), Fizbane and Zifnab (they look very similar and are named after characters from The Death Gate Cycle). I also inherited 5 from my daughter who moved out but wasn't allowed to take all 8 of her boys with her. So I had Artorias (he has since passed over the rainbow bridge, our big grey and white boy), Rufus (he is a naked boy. I helped her pick him out and name him after a Kim Possible character), Nuka (also helped her pick him), Mr. Moosqueaks (he is a rex, ie. "hairless" rat with a dark mark over his eye that reminded us of a cow), and Iffrit (also a rex).
Yes the dance videos I have found can have me a hot, sweaty mess in less than 20 minutes, great for days I don't want to go outside.
I hope you have a fantastic weekend.
1. How are you today? Is there anything you'd like to share? - I'm doing alright, Happy to be going home.
2. What are your ways in dealing with boredom without resorting to self-harm? - I like to keep a list of things I like to do, If it gets really bad I take a nap or I talk to my Bf.
3. How does your usual day look? Would you like to change it? Why or why not? - I get up and then decide what I would like to do with the day. The main things I do are clean and come on cups. But I've been expanding.
4. What are some unique things you'd suggest others to do when they're bored? - I also found that it is okay to be bored, I think it is something we have to learn to be okay with. But If it gets really bad, try and reach out, Do something to take your mind off of it like go outside or watch tv. Better to be bored then to SH.
@Goldcherry2113
Hello, Cherry! Im glad youre doing ok. Ooh, you can travel now where you are? Good to hear youre heading home though. Its a great idea to have a list of things to do when bored, especially if theyre manageable. We are not that different with our daily routines, dont have much of a plan.
That is a very good point you bring up- sometimes, it is ok to be bored. We dont have to be doing something 24/7. We can sit and do nothing for a bit, and accept that feeling. Meditate or visualise or journal. I like that. Take care of yourself.
1. How are you today? Is there anything you'd like to share? I'm fine. It wouldn't matter if I wasn't. Don't trust the police, the legal system, and no matter what your lawyer says he isn't on your side either.
2. What are your ways in dealing with boredom without resorting to self-harm? Job hunting. S idealization. Regretting having to be sober. And all the normal stuff cooking cleaning and daily whatnot.
3. How does your usual day look? Would you like to change it? Why or why not? Wake up check email and phone, do my stretches and exercises then eat something keep, job hunting. I'd like to be a multibillionaire but I'm not. I wont ever be so I'm not going to spend any time on it.
4. What are some unique things you'd suggest others to do when they're bored? Read, listen to music, exercise, find memes and maybe make some shere them. I know I'm ignoring the prerequisite that it be unique but I typed something.
@Flornhope
Hello, Florn! Im sorry to hear that youre not doing great in regards to authority. You do matter, so your feelings automatically matter. We might not be able to help you fix the problem- only you can do that- but sometimes a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on can be helpful too. Job hunting is an interesting one- maybe online as its a bit hard to do that in person? Having goals that seem unreachable and impossible can be motivating. Maybe start small, have $X in account, then a million, then multimillion etc. Just some suggestions. :)
Making and finding memes is a great idea! Im sure its fun for many people to do and see. Great idea! And you dont need to answer every question, nor do you have to answer it in the way I asked. So its all fine! :) Thank you for checking in, and I hope you can find acceptance in the legal system and the people youre involved with. Remember that were here for you, even if its just to listen. Dont be afraid to reach out, there are some great listeners on here. ❤️
@rebecca947 Thank you for your support and encouragement. The billionaire comment was more of a example of something silly or ridiculous. I have already done everything I have ever wanted years ago. Any more I just get up and do what I know I'm supposed to then go to bed. Then repeat. I have been job searching both in person and over the inter webs but I haven't gotten anywhere yet. And the authority stuff is exactly form personal life experiences. I being ignorant have trusted. It's just like the scorpion and the frog. The scorpion one day came about a body of water but of course it could not swim to get to the other side. It saw a frog and asked the frog if it would give him a ride to the other side. The frog said no you are a scorpion you will sting and kill me. The scorpion then replied no I won't. You will be helping me, you can trust me. After a bit of thinking the frog agreed and soon they were both making there way to the other side and as soon as the frog made it to the other side the scorpion stung the frog. The frog was shocked and as it was dying asked why have you killed me? I helped you I could have drowned you in the water. Why have you killed me? Then the scorpion said you should not have trusted me. I am a scorpion. I sting and kill. It is in my nature. You should have known better.
@rebecca947
Rebecca! Thank you for posting! I know boredom is a problem for many of my friends but I'm thankful that I don't suffer from it <3
1. How are you today? Is there anything you'd like to share?
I'm doing good today! I've gotten a lot of things done and I've actually been experimenting with new coffee recipes and also matcha!
2. What are your ways in dealing with boredom without resorting to self-harm?
I try and go through my coping list of activities :)
3. How does your usual day look? Would you like to change it? Why or why not?
My usual day.. oh my. I wake up at 5am for coffee/breakfast and plan my day. I work on things until around 9 or 10am which is when I usually take an hour break to workout and meditate. Then I work on 7 cups stuff until around 2PM and from 2pm-9pm, I do schoolwork, mental health projects, and some other stuff :P After 9pm I usually make it a rule for me to stop working on things and to connect with a friend and I usually stay up until 12 or 1am talking to friends :)
4. What are some unique things you'd suggest others to do when they're bored?
Write a love letter to someone and read it to them over call or something <3 it's a great way to practice gratitude and also making someone's day
*hugs for rebecca*
@TheAtticusFinch
Hello, Finch! :D Great to see you. Please teach me that skill of not ever being bored- I think myself and many others are in desperate want for that 😅
Thats great youre doing well! It sounds like youre having fun with experimentation- a scientist in your own house! I would ask for recipes but Im not a fan of either coffee or matcha :p but I hope its going well!
It sounds like many of us have a list of activities to do when bored or when wanting to self-harm, I love that!
I still cant believe you wake up at 5am- again, teach me please. Id LOVE to wake up that early, my schedule just doesnt allow for it a lot of the time. Sometimes I finish my job at 10pm, and I dont do well with less than 7hrs sleep. Its good to see that youre incorporating exercise into your day as a break from sedentary activities. You have a very busy scheduled day everyday! I love that. :)
Aww. That is such a sweet idea! ❤️ *hugs back* take care of yourself xx
-I am better than yesterday. Managed to make it through today with no crying or urges to self harm. Still struggling with anger.
-Redirecting myself to other activities. My dogs they are my whole world, I try and focus on them and what I can do to make them happier.
-Usual day- get up, feed dogs take them out, go to work, stress, come home eat, feed dogs, take them out, cry and go to bed. I wish I had more time to do things for me. I want to find more things I enjoy and make me happy.
-For me I know its not always a great coping skill but sleep helps sometimes. I am always tired so that helps but it is always a good way for me to start fresh in a way.
@Isabellyjelly
Hello, Jelly! Im so glad youre doing better than yesterday- thats all we can hope for every day, hey. Anger can be a tough emotion to deal with and to accept. Have you worked through the 7 Cups Managing Emotions self-help book? Heres the link to it in case youre interested- its just a suggestion, of course. Click here for it.
Aww, what dogs do you have breed wise, and their names?! I love dogs, and I love how you can focus and redirect your attention to them. It can help to have something asides from ourselves to take care of.
It can be hard to find things for ourselves. It sounds like your emotions are a big thing you have to deal with, through crying every day/a lot of the days. Crying can be a great coping mechanism for underlying causes- it can be helpful to figure out whats causing us to cry, and work on that. Personally, Id highly recommend working with a therapist if you find it hard to do yourself. As for finding what makes you happy, sometimes its all about trial and error. Give each hobby/task a good go at it, put in effort, come in with a good attitude and hope for the best. Try it out a few times minimum to see how it really feels for you.
Yes, sleep can be helpful! In moderation, of course, but it can definitely help us start that chapter of time in our day fresh. It can also make us feel better sometimes, which is an added bonus.
I hope you take good care of yourself ❤️ thank you for checking in with us xx
@rebecca947
My dogs are Mini Australian Shepherds one boy and one girl. They are my babies.
I have had many many therapists in these years. I actually just stopped seeing mine a week ago due to her not being consistent with me. I have a new appointment with a new one on June 1st. Looking forward to seeing if that helps.
Thanks for replying:)
1. I think it's interesting how I can't tolerate boredom anymore. Or at least do something useful with my time.
2. I used to go straight to reading, drawing, or writing when I was a kid, but I also had friends that I could go outside with. I no longer have friends near me (and just 1 friend that I know personally rather than anonymously). I had this goal of being a published writer by 16. I didn't make that dream but I miss those days when I'd just think, "ok, this is my goal and today I'm going to work for it". Kept me from being bored.
3. I want to change my day, absolutely. School ended last week so my days are looking like: wake up at late, lay in bed a few hours, stare at my computer - watching tv shows, playing games, researching random things in history, or being on social media - until it's time to go to bed between 11 pm and 2 am. I hate it. It's unstructured. I've tried planning my day and it's not sticking because there's no external force like school to make me adhere to the schedule. Last night I looked up who invented ice cream floats. Ice. Cream. Floats. I have no problem with the randomness, it's the fact that I thought I'd spend 30 seconds of my time doing that because I was so bored. What can I do with that info? Absolutely nothing. I don't even like soda smh.
4. What are some unique things you'd suggest others to do when they're bored?
I have no idea
