Anxiety and SH - really really need advice
Ive had depression for a long time. I never actually self harmed until really recently, and I don’t even know if it’s considered self harm, I would just scratch at any parts of myself until they turned red or felt like it burned. either way, I’ve been trying not to do this bad habit, and it’s just really really hard. I have pretty bad anxiety and little things cause me to panic really easily. Right now im dealing with some relationship issues and just the anxiety around my relationship issues and wanting that feeling of anxiety to go away, but not wanting to take out those emotions on my boyfriend or other people, I don’t know what to do with those feelings. I don’t want to take out this anxiety negatively on my boyfriend, especially when he is already busy and dealing with his own issues. And, it causes us to spiral further down a relationship rabbit hole and my anxiety gets worse. But then, if I sit with it, I don’t know where to put it. Without resolving it or “taking it out” on someone or something, it sits there giving me the jitters and I can’t think straight or focus at all. I start physically shaking and I just keep falling down a spiral of negativity. And that anxiety when it starts to build up and become too much, i take it out on myself to make myself feel better. And for the longest time, even right now, I feel like taking it out on myself instead of other people or instead of sitting with it is the best option for everyone. But it’s so hard because I want to find a healthier way to cope, this one just seems the easiest. My boyfriend has told me that I should look into therapy but, without going into the details of my situation too much, that’s not an option right now. Among the self harm, there are other thoughts that I don’t know if I should talk about here. But assuming that anyone reading this can see in between the lines, those thoughts haven’t just come and go like before for me, the emotions are piling up and it’s hard to keep them from leaving at all. Even when im in a situation where im “supposed” to feel happy I just can’t. This- it’s the only thing I ever think about anymore and I don’t know what to do. I don’t feel like I have any more options left to make the pain go away.
When my anxiety gets rly bad, everyone can tell because my foot starts tapping on the floor like crazy. Which makes it worse cause now everyone’s staring at me. Anyways, one think that really comforts me is sitting in complete darkness. I like sitting in my closet. I also count down from 500- but any number works! If I still haven’t calmed down, I go into the negatives! Idk if this would work for you, but it does for me. Anyways, I hope everything works out well in the end. <33
@anonymousturtle1121
it sounds like things are really overwhelming for you. I’m really glad that you are on 7 cups and hope that the support here can be helpful to you.
I can’t really give you advice, but I do understand what you are dealing with. If you want to chat with someone, feel free to send me a pm. Just let me know you are from the self harm forums.
~Kristy
@anonymousturtle1121
You got this. You will get through it even though it may be hard. I believe in you as your fellow anxietic friend.
Shadow work prompts are questions you ask yourself that push you to uncover repressed thoughts or feelings.
So here are some shadow work questions for you all......
- What makes me feel self-conscious?
- In what situations am I most hard on myself?
- Do the people around me represent my value?
- What do I feel in my body when I am scared or anxious?
- How would I describe myself?
I hope these self discovery questions would be a little help for you all to know yourself.
#together_we_can_overcome
