Loneliness
It seems like the harder my life got, the less support I had. I gave my all to raising my sons and providing a good life for them that I ignored my own needs. As I began losing all I worked hard to achieve, and the friends and family that I needed in my life, I crumbled. I try to feel more for other people but I don’t. Not in relationship to me. I feel others pain and I hurt for them. I don’t feel a connection to anyone though. I want to. I want to have friends again but it doesn’t happen. No matter how much I feel like I care, it’s out of site out of mind with everyone. There is nobody left who knows me. Who understand what makes me the way I am. I was a strong person. I got knocked down so many times and got back up. I haven’t gotten back up this time though. So people look at me and only see weakness? Failure? They see I have given up but nobody knows how many times I didn’t give up. It matters to me that I have nobody left who knew me then and now. I need to not be so alone. What I need though I don’t think can be given.
@kindTurtle3738 hi there! aww im so sorry to hear that! having a support network can be so important and beneficial! im so sorry you didnt have that <3 that is a really noble and selfless thing for you to do, but I understand how it would've negatively affected you! it makes sense that after that you would just break down, it can be so hard to keep trying after all that <3 i get how you would feel for and hurt for others, but yet no have a connection! it sounds like this is a really frustrating situation for you! I still believe you are a strong person! you have fought to hard, and made it this far! i know it feels like it might never change, but it will be okay <3 you aren't alone in this fight, i am here to support you, and so many people go through things like this who will support you! thank you so much for sharing this all with us, my best wishes are sent to you <3
That brought tears to my eyes. Thank you for all of your kind words!!