First time you ever experimented with self-harm?

first time I self harmed was because my ex boyfriend broke up with me and I grabbed some kitchen scissors and cut pretty deep, it got kinda infected and was so ugly to look at

First time wad when iidkjust being depressed so i scratched my leg with my fingernails deeply, there wad blood, and it pooked like a tiger had mauled my leg. 2nd time was after this guy yelledat me and made me have anpanic attack so i scratches some more then too. I only got into cutting recently and i like it

I really wouldn't call what I did 'experimenting'. It was sometime early January of last year and during my last period class, a friend of mine told me something that greatly upset me. Prior to this I had been having these... feelings or whatever of self-hate and general hopelessness and I was sad all the time and starting to grow angry at the world. So after he told me something that gave my already low self esteem a beating, I went home, crying quietly to myself. That night I was sitting crosslegged on my bed, listening to YouTube music videos when I looked over and saw a pair of scissors sitting next to me. It never really crossed my mind what I was doing. I never even planned it out. But what I do know is, that after I made that first cut on my left leg, I wanted to make more, much deeper ones. I wasn't sure if it was possible to bleed out from cuts made on your leg but a part of me hoped I would. Since then I've cut off and on all year. Until the last time I cut in mid-November. Now it's January again, and all I can think about is the first time I cut and how I really want -need- to do it again. But I'm staying strong and taking steps to ignore these urges. My legs have enough scars on them. I don't want to add more.

I was in middle school the fist time it was during 7thgrade I was being bullied at the time and my parents were arguing a lot normally I would block them out with music but for some reason I didn't even bother with it that time instead I locked my self in the bathroom grabbeda shaving razor sat on the tile floor and started slashing at my lower forearm until I was bleeding then I sat watching my arm bleed until it stopped. The cuts were many but shallow they healed completely with time but while they were healing I would press on them when I was feeling bad to bring back the physical pain. I started again in high schoolI was in a new district and felt alone with my group/click or what ever people call it most days it started with me hit my head when I felt like done something wrong or social out of place I would hit against the wall or use my fist later this would continuesporadicallythought high school It would be in sophomore year though when I take up a shaving razor again though same method as before. There were times sporadically inbetween these events where I would dig my nails into my forearm for long periods of time to the point that it would leave a mark for a couple of days.

I have never cut myself but I would find other ways like slapping myself, or punching myself on the stomach, deliberately starving, or hitting my head against the wall. It started when I was 9. At first I thought little of thesethings but as I get older, I realize that these too are a form of self harm. It's hard at first but with the right people around me and motivation, I'm beginning to be a better person and I've stopped harming myself. I'm starting to love life and the little things that make life beautiful. I'm meeting new people and discovering so much. So for those of you who are harming yourself, don't. Because things will get better. You just have to give life a chance. :)

I was 14 and having an anxiety attack, I scratched my leg with my fingernails till my skin was raw and bleeding. I scratched myself more and more often, but soon it wasn't enough so I started cutting. II haven't cut in 8 days (which is a pretty big deal). I just don't want to have to self-harm to cope anymore.

6th grade, took a small knife from the knife rack at my house and decided to experiment. Now I'm barely two weeks clean. But its better than nothing, right?

Am i the only one finding it weird/uncomfortable calling it 'experimenting' with self harm?

When I started self harming, I made a blog to vent. The first one I ever wrote was this:My head is no longer on straight. I?m at war with myself. Every time I swear everything is perfect something has to come along question all my thoughts. I gave, I give you ALL my love. I?ve never in my life done that before. I?ve never been in love before tillnow & to be honest sometimes Iwish I wasn?t. Cause it brings me to my worst when I?m alone. Yes, when I?m with you I am at my happiest. But when I?m alone, I have the craziest breakdowns. I cry & i cry. Sometimes I don?t know why & I pace & I pace. The worst part of it, I?ve been depressed for a while. Before you. Before we started going out. But I was fine with it. Never spoke to anyone about it cause there used to be other things that kept my mind distracted. But now I?m in fucking love. This is some fucking bullshit man. I told you when we first started talking, you shouldn?t like me cause i?m a fucking wreck. That i was always fucking angry. YOU DIDN?T FUCKING LISTEN TO ME. Now i?m just beyond angry. Now I?m just fucking hurt. Cause I don?t know what to do anymore ! You think you know me, it makes me so sad to say you don?t. When we talk, I talk & talk about bullshit. You know that. & that?s because I can?t tell you the truth. Why would I ? It?s just all stupid. The worst feeling is feeling stupid & that?s the way I feel daily. I feel ugly. I know i?m ugly & when you tell me i?m beautiful I get so conflicted whether I should feel happy or should I get mad for you lying to me. I hold so much back. Nobody wants to love a fucking maniac. But either way I feel like you can?t love me. If this strong feeling that I have for you is love ? & you loved another. Then there?s no way you can be with me, without thinking that you wish I was her. I don?t wanna think all this but I can?t help it. I?m so sorry. But YOU CAN?T BLAME ME. You CAN?T BE MAD AT ME. I just wish I could go inside your mind and PULL OUT THE FUCKING TRUTH. Have you really forgotten about her ? Do I make you happy ? Will I ever make you happy ? I?m sorry, don?t be angry. But you can?t imagine the immense of insecurities I have. But everyday I have to overlook them so I could just pass by people and do what has to be done but once I?m alone. I let loose. It?s gotten worse. I was just fine before you. Just fucking perfect. But I know now that even without you, there?s no going back to the old me. I go on her Facebook, look at everything she puts up about you.. The pictures the status' I'm not really like this but it was just so tempting. & I see all this stuff, it?s just like wow. But do you I set myself up to see all that stuff ? All seriousness. Why am I not good enough ? Please tell me. All i could think is why am i not as special ? I want to be Important. It all kills me inside. I?m giving you all my love, all my heart, my world even, & at the same time I secretly cry wondering if your honestly giving some in return.

I first experimented with self harm when I was 15. I started because of severe family problems and I felt like I was relieving some of the pain I felt. After about a year, my friends saw me in my bathing suit and asked what they were. I told them it was an accident. I told them I accidentally cut myself while shaving. They didn't buy the story and they sat me down and told me that they would be lost without me and that there are many people that love me. I've been clean ever since but when things get hard I have the urge to start it back up, but I don't because I made a promise to them and myself that I wouldn't inflict pain on myself ever again.