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First time you ever experimented with self-harm?

User Profile: Laura
Laura December 10th, 2014

Share your story here.

696
User Profile: Redjellybeans
Redjellybeans September 11th, 2015

I started to 6 years ago when someone very close to me died. I have been trying not to for a while now.

1 reply
User Profile: generousSun57
generousSun57 September 16th, 2015

I'm proud of you🍀

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User Profile: 7thAngelBerry
7thAngelBerry September 13th, 2015

I only started about 2 weeks ago. I used a cuter at first, but then I got a hold on a Art Scalpel.

I just like the thrill of it and in relation to me trying to purge and not eat, its been the first thing to show any effect. That's why I like it (I think). I want to see blood running down my body but I haven't been making very deep cuts and I have to place them strategically so that no one can make the connection. If I knew that I couldn't be send to a psychiatrist/ hospital I would tell somebody but I don't trust anybody to keep it to themselfs. That's how I landed here.

1 reply
User Profile: Chiaroscuro1
Chiaroscuro1 September 16th, 2015

@7thAngelBerry - Welcome. We hope you feel safe here.

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User Profile: depressedastheyare
depressedastheyare September 13th, 2015

It was one time when I had been feeling so low. I felt really useless and I felt like nobody liked me or cared. So I got a small screw driver, I cleaned it, and ran it up and down my thigh. It was more of a scratch. No blood, but it was a weak moment of mine. I couldn't feel when I had done it, and I didn't know what happened. I haven't done anything since, but I think I'm too cowardly to do anything..

User Profile: anitaa94
anitaa94 September 13th, 2015

I started about 2 years ago. I was in a really bad place, everything in my life seemed to be bad, I didn't know who I can trust, I hated myself, I hated the school I was going to, I hated people at my school... I kept losing people and I thought it was all my fault. So one day I picked a razor and cut my thigh for the first time and it was liberating. And I loved the feeling...

I'm glad to say I didn't cut since August 14th last year

User Profile: reliableDime7450
reliableDime7450 September 13th, 2015

It started 6 years ago when I was severely bullied for my weight.

User Profile: lostsouls13
lostsouls13 September 16th, 2015

I started cutting in Grade five . My stepmom was calling me worthless and saying she hated me and she choked me . I decided if i couldnt die , i would cut . I tried , it hurt .. but i loved it . I still do . My longest time clean was like a month . In november of last year , i had to call the cops on my dad because he was beating me so bad . I started cutting again . right now , my arms and legs are covered in cuts and scars .

User Profile: That1unicornqueen
That1unicornqueen September 16th, 2015

The first time I cut, I was afraid to. I picked up a knife and would gently scrape it against my skin. It wouldn't cut but it would irritate my skin pretty back. It wasn't until I experimented with blades from sharpeners that I started getting worse. I would cut all over my wrists and arms. I remember feeling amazing and alive once blood flowed out all over my arms. I'm glad to say that I'm clean now and have retired my blades. (i had a funeral for them and threw them away)

4 replies
User Profile: Chiaroscuro1
Chiaroscuro1 September 16th, 2015

@That1unicornqueen - Funeral for your blades - good idea! Won't you please share more about this. I'd like to know.

3 replies
User Profile: That1unicornqueen
That1unicornqueen September 18th, 2015

What would you like to know?

2 replies
User Profile: Chiaroscuro1
Chiaroscuro1 September 21st, 2015

Did you just throw them away or did you bury them? Was it just you or did you have "witnesses" ? Did someone say something? Was it impulsive or did you plan it? Was there some kind of ritual or ceremony? Those kinds of things.

User Profile: Chiaroscuro1
Chiaroscuro1 September 24th, 2015

@That1unicornqueen - I see I didn't tag you, so I don't know if you got my questions, so I'm tagging you now, because I would really like to know more if you are willing to tell.

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User Profile: Beoriginallybeautiful
Beoriginallybeautiful September 16th, 2015

The first time I ever experienced self harm I was 8. To be honest, I dont know why I did it.... I just did. I only did it twice, but I remember it happening. Then, at 11 I had something beyond traumatic happen and I thought "hey, cutting, why not?" ever since Ive done it every single night to get some relief.

User Profile: musiccat
musiccat September 17th, 2015

It was probably like 9 months ago now, I was hurting really bad inside and it was one of my first bad depression days. I had these little mini exacto knives, and i was sort of playing with one, and i just kind pressed it a little into the back my thumb, by about the the 5 time, i drew blood. Since then ive done it one my wrist once, then i moved to my ankle, and now i do it on my hip as its the easiest to hide...

User Profile: Fermiparadox
Fermiparadox September 20th, 2015

I started when I was 11. So, 10 years ago. I was bullied by a guy in my class and he told me what many other kids in my class told me... that I wasn't deserving of their friendship. I felt so alone. I remember afterwards I felt strange. It was a mix of relief and shame. And then I tried so hard to hide it. My mom forced me to wear long sleeve shirts. I felt so ashamed. So I started cutting on my legs.