First time you ever experimented with self-harm?

I remember it very well. I had just seen Avatar (with the blue people) and came home. My gf at the time called me and she was crying because she had self-harmed herself and I was freaking out.

So I naturally grabbed a knife a cut my finger tips. That wasn't very lethal, but from there it got worse. I eventually started to cut on my shoulders daily and the scars will never go away.

The last time I cut was on my suicide attempt about 3 years ago. From then on, I decided that I will never cut again and I still haven't to this day.

I was 13 and I had just started high school. My depression had just started and I didn't know what was going on. No one understood me so I turned to self harm

I started at 10. First tried breaking my arm. It was an attempt to get any attention in a large family. I was the good kid, never in trouble, and was ignored from birth.

But rapidly got much worse when 14-yr old brother started abusing me. I tried destroying my vagina using bathroom cleaner. My parents knew about my brother but ignored my requests to do something, anything!

Self-harm after that went away. But, in late 40s I found it "helped my pain" to beat myself or bang my arm or head on a tree. Last time I self-harmed was 3 yrs ago, age 55.

I understand the problem of self-harm now. I try rapid exercise ( even with physical disabilities) instead - to build happy endorphins. Then I have to rest, creating a meditation/mindfulness experience. Works for me.

Thank y'all at 7 Cups for letting me share stuff no one else knows about. I am learning more about myself here than in last 14 yrs of treatment. Hugs to all.

I was 13 years old and my parents were going through a divorce that my younger siblings and I were caught in. My father was abusive, passive-aggressive, and a pathological liar and it was the first time I really saw that about him and saw how he was affecting my life and my family's life. I lived with both parents off-and-on for a while, but it was really hard for me being an oldest sibling because my father was too busy drinking to take care of us and my mother was too busy working all the time and going to court to try to keep custody of us after false accusations of domestic violence to really be a parent to my siblings and I.

As a kid, I ended up having to take on the role of both parents and raise two kids almost by myself, and the pressure to be the "strong one" because of that and set an example for my siblings was probably the one thing that led me to self harm. At first it was little things- I'd dig my nails into my skin whenever I felt angry or upset instead of talking to people and risking feeling vulnerable, but then I graduated to broken pieces of glass and eventually razors. It was never really a suicide attempt or a cry for help for me when I would self harm, but an attempt to cope with all the anger and betrayal and responsibility that had been thrust upon me. It ended up being only the way I knew how to manage depression for a long time because I didn't have other resources available to me and my situation was unique and hard to understand.

Contains triggers:

Uhm... a year ago? I immediately knew it was something I shouldn't have done but I felt like it was the only thing I could do because I deserved to be punished, I had let down my mother so that was everything I deserved. It went on as a punishment for a few months then I just did it because it made me feel better in some weird way.

Last time I thought I was never going to be able to see the marks left on my skin by the cuts I inflicted to myself, the plan was to never see naything again, but somehow I didn't succeed and now I'm here wondering if that was a good thing to happen.

A few months back I broke a coffee mug in frustration and then cut myself with it. I smoke cigarettes when I am feeling anxious and restless. And I often burn myself with it when I hate myself for feeling weak. I cry a lot and then hate myself for crying. And I know cigarettes are bad for me but I want it and hate it at the same time. I am scared of myself sometimes.

I have spent my life in boarding schools ever since I was five. I don't blame my parents. They did the best they could.But I feel tired now for doing everything on my own. Like I need someone to help me,decide for me and for once I want to stop thinking.

I am tired and sad.. Miserable. :( :(

started when i was 18. before i reached that age i don't know what self-harm is. all my life, when I'm emotionally in pain, i feel the need for physical pain. but i don't know how to hurt myself physically. then i took my shaver. took me quite a while to separate the razors from the plastic thingy. i found relief. but lately i don't feel anything anymore no matter how deep i cut myself. I'm trying to find other ways to distract myself. can't find one.

Start of Jan this year, accidentally cut myself and did it on purpose after

I was very young, about nine. I would intentionally falls down stairs and choke myself with my scarves. When I was eleven was when I started cutting and I've been clean for a few weeks now.

I think this thread is important because I had always wondered what started all of this. I didn't realize how early I started until it became a more severe issue as I got older, but according to my parents, it was around when I was in preschool. A teacher had apparently notified them that whenever I was extremely stressed, I would hit myself (with my own fists, toys, whatever). It's interesting how things progress as we grow, and sometimes not in a good way, but interesting nonetheless.