Help me to help you
Hello. I recently found myself stunted by a guest who needed help with their anxiety, that was the result of unemployment. However, this person refused to give me any moreinformation other than "I am anxious/unemployed". As much as I asked and tried to empathize, they just repeated the same thing. And it was discouraging to see the bad grade they gave me when I had nothing to work on other than relaxation techniques and cognitive restructuring that clearly didn't help them.
How am I supposed to actively help someone who will not actively talk?
Hi. I am brand new to this app and this is my very first post, so please forgive me if something seems out of place since I'm not too sure of how this works.
I don't think that it's within a realistic realm of possibility that you can help someone who isn't willing to put forth some effort to help themselves. However, there is always another side to consider....perhaps whatever it was that was making that person so anxious was also preventing him/her from being more forthright about their information. They may have felt extremely frustrated by the scenario and lashed out on you in retaliation. I'm not saying that WAS the case, or that it would have been fair if it was, just that it could be a logical possibility. Seems to me that this particular case reflects more on them than you. Of course...I guess that doesn't help if you got a bad review/rank/score....like I said, I have no idea how this app works yet. I just kind of wanted to say: don't let 1 snarky person get ya down.
Thanks, I won't let it get me down. I'm also fairly new but at least the guests I've talked with have been open about their problems, and I understandit's difficult to ask someone to open up with a stranger through a chat room. They did seem pretty frustrated but to the point where nothing I said seemed helpful; I'm not sure what kind of answers they were looking for but it sure wasn't going to fall from the sky unto their lap.
I guess I need a bit more practic coaxing insecure guests into a comfortable space so they understand I'm there to help but only if they let me. I only hope this person finds a listener who can help.
Don't take it personally. My mother is like this. She blames her anxiety on my brothers and I, yet she counts on me to help her all the time b/c she is alone. It's contradictive, but I just don't say anything until her criticism reaches a point where I can't take it. These people like sympathy, but also like to be in control and like compliments. It's sad, but you don't have to get upset about it. It's not your fault.
Hello, I was just wondering if I could have some more information on all or the leadership positions and mentors and moderators? I am very interested and I'm having trouble finding more information on things like that.
The FAQ is in a pop down menu under your user name (click on it and pop down menu) 2/3 of the way down the faq is community involvement and community leadership.
Another way to know what is going on is go to alerts and post to them and subscribe to them all.
Here is the faq link
https://www.7cups.com/forum/ListenersOnlyForums_38/FAQforNewListeners_106/FrequentlyAskedQuestions_11301/1/
This happened to me and I found after 45 minutes that I had to excuse myself to have dinner with my family. But before I did this I offered guides, and any possible help. Sometimes people want to talk but don't know what to talk about.
