What are Your 3 Words? How to Identify Your Frequency
You are a unique person. There is nobody else like you. You have your own unique signature way of being.
You are different from others in very concrete ways. You have different DNA, fingerprints, and tastes. Even simple things like walking are unique to you. How fast or slow, how your arms move, how your legs and feet are positioned as you walk are all unique to you. This is called your gait. Similarly, you also have a unique way of talking. The way you weave emotion into your words, the way hand mannerisms and other non-verbals complement what you are expressing, and the cadence of your speech are also all unique to you.
We can even step back further and think about the relationships you have had with people. These could be family members or friends. No other person has walked the relational path and had those experiences with all of those individuals in the way that you have. You have walked down your own unique path.
I was recently visiting another part of the world and interviewing people. I asked them what does your culture know, that the broad culture of the United States does not know, but should know? Slowly at first, but then more quickly, people opened up and started sharing. They said things like:
-People in the United States are very stressed; we are not as stressed
-We do things in a sustainable way. When we have plenty we help others, when we do not have plenty we tighten up and ask others for help.
-Our culture happens mostly on a vibrational or energetic level. Your culture does not seem to pick up on this different way of being.
These same themes happened over and over again. The differences between our two cultures became more stark the more I sunk into their culture. As I learned, I began to understand that from their perspective, it was like the cultures were operating on two different frequencies. The Americans were tuned into one frequency that was informing the way they lived. People from this other culture were tuned into a different frequency.
They wouldn’t always use the term frequency. Sometimes they would say vibes, vibrations, or energy. For them, the most healing frequency was the “nature” frequency. They believed that nature was primarily healing and if they tuned into this frequency it would allow them to have a more peaceful frequency in their own lives or family.
From their view, people and all groups of people - this could be a couple, a family, a town, a region, or a country - all had their own unique frequency. Cultures, philosophies, and religions/spiritualities also had their own frequency.
One person said: The frequency is the sequence that you frequent.
This struck me as particularly insightful and made me wonder about the process of helping people identify their own frequency. I tried to distill down the learnings into a simple exercise. While there, and since coming back, I have shared this exercise with a handful of people including the 7 Cups team (they gave it a 9 out of 10). I’ll share it with you now.
1. Think about your best self - when you are in the flow and operating in a way that feels great. Try to step into that way of being for a moment.
2. What are 3 words or adjectives that describe you in this state?
3. Write down those 3 words. For example, if you are Resilient, Kind, and Smart, then your frequency would be the first 3 letters of each of those words: RKS.
(Everything in blue is the working example of this exercise): I (Glen) asked H for their 3 words. They chose Sincerity - Resilience - Loyalty
4. Ask someone you like or trust to now share their 3 words they feel describes you. Take one that resonates the most with you. For example, let’s say you ask me and I say you are Thoughtful, Patient, and Resilient. Resilient would cancel out because you already identified that. You’d then determine whether Thoughtful or Patient was a better word. Let’s say you chose Patient. In that case, your frequency would be: RKSP. Share your 3 words with the other person as well.
I gave H 3 words I feel describe them: Thoughtful - Patient - Resilient
From those 3, H chose Thoughtful. WIth this fourth word, their frequency is SRLT
5. For those who are visual in how they perceive things, you can also imagine an image that represents your frequency. H views their frequency as being represented by water as an image they can step into to better operate or stay true to their frequency.
Once you have your image, share that with the other person. Now, you can pick a picture you feel represents them, too.
Now, do this exercise again, but for the other person! (Ask for their 3 words that represent how they describe their frequency, give them your 3 words for them to pick 1 from, ask them to share their image of themself and find an image that comes to mind when you think of them).
6. Think about any influences/factors that become obstacles to your flow state/best self. How can you work on minimizing the impact of these obstacles?
It can also be interesting to think of this in a way that is similar to how radio stations work. Radio stations have a transmitter that is connected to an antenna. Different stations send out information over the air through different wavelengths that are not visible. When you tune into a station by turning the dial or knob, you are using your antenna and receiver to pick up on that station’s frequency. That is what enables you to hear the songs or talk shows on that particular station.
You can imagine that other psychological or cultural frequencies are being sent out. Harmful ideas or certain advertising campaigns for example, can be viewed as a sort of negative frequency that people accidentally tune into. This station then informs what people think about and how they feel about themselves. Even someone that wants you to feel bad about yourself - maybe because they are insecure or it helps them feel better - can be seen as sending you a certain vibe, energy, or frequency. They want you to tune into their station and see yourself as they see you, rather than be true to your own natural frequency and see yourself as you are.
If you find yourself outside of your own frequency band (ie., not operating in a way that is consistent with your 4 words), then you can tune back into your own frequency by acting in a courageous way. Being courageous might be one way of changing the station back to your own natural frequency, and recognizing the obstacles as well as factors that impact our frequency can help us get there.
@Hope had some interesting thoughts on this. She said, “I was very surprised to see that other people could see my frequency so clearly. I had thought it was more hidden. Seeing that happen was validating.”
If you are comfortable, please share your 3 words and an image (if you want) below that captures your frequency. You can also ask someone in the community to share their 3 words with you too. This will enable us to do the exercise as a community.
Bonus: You can think of 7 Cups as also giving off a frequency. What would be your 3 words for 7 Cups?
My words are productive, focused, and calm. I like when I’m deep into an assignment or book. It makes me feel like it’s the only thing in the world I have to think about 😌
@GlenM
Wow! Thank you for sharing! I never really thought about it but when I take a look from an outsiders view I can see how United States is stressed. We have such a high expectation to perform and are greedy people sometimes. Not all Americans are but when you look at our society as a whole it is.
KDR - Kind, determined, rebounding.
After asking a friend it would be KDRO with O being "open-minded"