Dealing with mean people
Hi,
I am a PhD student, my supervisors are mean, and they only care about publications.
This is the end of my fifth year, and I was aiming to reach the defense, but they introduced more challenging work. They misled me sometimes, creating a lot of stress and pressure. When I say I do not know, they say it is my PhD and I should find a way.
The problem is that they do not provide resources either literature or other contacts for help.
How can I deal with such people? Also, I am an international student.
What do you suggest, these days, I can not sleep well.
Thanks
@dew101
It is your PhD and they assume at this level you should be able to figure it out.... perhaps that seems mean but have you considered they might have also been treated similarly when in your shoes. a sort of rite of passage things.
I am not condoning that sort of behavior but in many educational things a person who was not treated well in turn pass that on.
you got this keep pushing
Hi there! I am here to hepl, text me if you feel so!
@dew101 Hey there dew101! Really sorry to hear what you're going through. It must be difficult, especially when it involves rude supervisors who mislead you and just make your academic life more difficult than it really is. I totally get where you're coming from and know that you're not alone in this and we're all here for you. Have you ever tried consulting the main head of your institution regarding this? Do you think this would help things out? Or have you thought about any other possible solutions?
Awaiting for your response :)
@dew101
It sounds like you’re dealing with a really challenging and frustrating situation. Supervisors who focus only on publications without offering proper support can make the already demanding PhD journey even more difficult, I'm really sorry.
It’s clear you’ve been trying your best despite the obstacles, and that takes a lot of resilience.
I hope it gets better for you (:
Hey dew, How are you doing?
That must be frustrating having to deal with your supervisors and also overwhelming tasks they give you. Your health is at utmost importance. I understand how dealing with them might be hard.
What are other resources or ways you can think of that might help?
@dew101
Hello Dew,
I am sorry you are struggling with unsupportive supervisors. It must be difficult not to feel supported during your PhD. Publications create pressure and stress on you and I am sorry it impacted your sleep.
How are coping with insomnia? Do you have support to navigate this situation?
@dew101 Hi dew101,
I’m really sorry you’re going through this. You’ve put in five years of hard work, and it’s unfair to be facing additional challenges without proper guidance.
Fot tips, you might consider:
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Seeking External Support – Are there other faculty members, postdocs, or senior PhD students in your department who could offer guidance? Even informal mentorship can make a huge difference.
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University Resources – Many universities have graduate student support services, ombudsman offices, or counseling services. They might be able to mediate or offer strategies for dealing with difficult supervisors.
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Community & Networks – Engaging with academic forums, conferences, or online research communities could help you find alternative perspectives and even potential collaborators.
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Clarifying Boundaries – If their demands are unreasonable, politely but firmly push back. Consider documenting your work and interactions to create a clear case if needed.
If the situation becomes unbearable, seeking advice from student advocacy groups or legal services at your university may also be an option!!
You’re not alone in this, and I hope you find a path forward that allows you to complete your PhD on your terms. Stay strong!
Would love to hear how things go, plssss update. 💙