Hello, I'm new - 9 days sober
Hi all,
I joined 7cups to seek help for depression and panic episodes. The past month has been really difficult--I became acutely aware of certain unhealthy cycles. (Honestly, the past 4 years have been emotionally and physically devastating). I realized the tremendous negative effect alcohol has on my mental health and am 9 days sober. I hope to come here to maintain my sobriety.
My reasons for getting and staying free from alcohol:
1) I want to change and stop avoiding negative emotions. (I'm ready to process pain, grief, shame and to confront my anxiety.)
2) Physical health
3) Clarity
4) I want to renew joy and hope
Much love,
Ann
@Clumsyannie
Cool 
Thank you guys all so much for your encouragement and for checking in. I'm still going strong, day 45! I've had 2 urges over the past 5 days following high stress but it was temporary and I was able to resist.
This week I feel was another turning point. I felt depression lifting a bit and experienced a reconnection with true joy as I played with my children and enjoyed walks with my close friend.
I feel more open to happiness.
What's helping me get through is:
-Managing the hard things I have to do and go through by taking time to rest and "play" rather than pushing through one pile of tasks only to be encountered with more demands.
-I have a bracelet that I put a knot in for every day of sobriety.
-Telling myself not one sip ever.
-Keeping in mind that every difficult situation will pass and that every urge is temporary.
Things to think about next week: my therapist discussed trying medication for anxiety and depression. I'm undecided but am really moving towards this being necessary.
Much love and thank you guys,
Ann
@Clumsyannie
OMG....You had me/us scared 
not really, We knew you had it covered!
L👀K at you go. CONGRATULATIONS! 45 - STRONG & ALIVE! CONGRATULATIONS!
I'm really proud of you for pushing past your urges.
I know it was not easy but it is powerful... Good Job.
I'm glad that you shared some of your methods and tools that are helping you make it through the days. Those tricks are great and can help others too. Love the bracelet idea!
Your actual nose is your last defense because you have that much time to say NO! The time the edge of the alcohol container passes the tip of your nose and before it reaches your lips, a powerful moment!
REMEMBER... THE NOSE N.O.S.E. (I'm really glad it's helping) but you're doing all the work, and so again.... Good Job!
I noticed there's several people here you seem to have some good experience in this area probably like to support and help you if you're going through hard times. Come and talk if you need to but to tell you the truth, it sounds like you're really really taking a strong stand on your own and that is freaking amazing!
Am glad you are sober over time things will become better for your wellbeing I've been there. But to be honest don't chat to a listener cause they will actually probably make you relapse, stay clear
Today is day 51. ❤️ I'm having a hard time today but not with urges. My resilience there is strong and I'm proud of that; it brings me a sense of peace and strength.
My struggle today has been anxiety; having to breathe/calm myself down from panic.
I am trying to remind myself that I am strong, I am calm, my body is strong and healthy, my mind is clear and collected; past fears and trauma are not in the present and are not destined to reoccur. And, I can rely on my strength, courage, patience and love.
It has been hard.
I need to remember to eat, hydrate and rest.
Much love, and I hope that everyone feels peace and strength,
Ann
@Clumsyannie
I'm sorry I didn't have time to reply last night. I am proud of you for making it to day 51. Congratulations. It's your sober and you're sober alone. You are doing a wonderful job protecting your sober and teaching it how to be strong.
Without the make believe relief of the booze, everything will seem harder to deal with and in truth it may seem they are harder to deal with, but in reality you simply are not ignoring these things anymore, not finding the escape in the booze anymore. The keywords here are "TO DEAL WITH".
I'm really sorry you were going through a hard time yesterday and I hope today you're feeling a little bit better or a lot better.
Your post yesterday was perfect. Everything you said down below is powerful and positive so continue to say those things and continue to believe in yourself because in yourself you have hope, truth and the determination for a better and stronger day.
"My struggle today has been anxiety; having to breathe/calm myself down from panic.
I am trying to remind myself that I am strong, I am calm, my body is strong and healthy, my mind is clear and collected; past fears and trauma are not in the present and are not destined to reoccur. And, I can rely on my strength, courage, patience and love."
Anxiety can be so crippling and nerve wracking. I'm glad to hear you did your breathing exercises to calm yourself down. Not only was that very smart but it's imperative to regain balance of your emotions. Good job on that. That was so much more amazingly golden then taking a drink. That was good, very good. Not that I matter that much but I am very impressed. Great job! I know it was probably still extremely hard to deal with your anxiety but you did it and I do hope that today it's easier on you because you deserve it.
I want to remind you that you mastered one of your objectives at the beginning of this thread ( without booze)
1) I want to change and stop avoiding negative emotions. (I'm ready to process pain, grief, shame and to confront my anxiety.)
Please, if you have the time give us a quick note about how you're feeling today. Thanks
@Clumsyannie it's so amazing to see you come this far Ann! I took my inspiration from your strong will and determination and started my own workout streak. Just want to let you know, never give up Ann, you have no idea how many people might be looking up to you right in this moment, you are an inspiration for them! <3