Compassion and Pain
- Have you ever become more compassionate toward people as a result of your own pain?
- Please share an example, if you're comfortable with it.
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Pain: I was in a serious domestic violence relationship. I lost a baby after four months on bedrest. I was naive I was 22. Now I know he had all the typical traits of an abuser. At the time I just felt I loved him and couldn't make it without him. I went to a dv shelter.
I started working at that shelter when I got out. It was the first time I spent time around a group of people who were suffering so much. I and most had been horribly humiliated. We were vunerable. My heart broke open for all of us. It was easy to be compassionate, we were all in the same boat.
@soulsings
Have you ever become more compassionate toward people as a result of your own pain?
Yes, it happens all the time.
Please share an example, if you're comfortable with it.
I'm less b***hy, in general, and that's a good thing. I was just really spoiled and a little bit conceded and then I was diagnosed with several health issues, a couple of which are disabilities, and I was in soo much pain all the time, I still am, I basically just didn't have the energy to act like that, and I realized after meeting people with similar or the same conditions how they didn't whine or complain all the time, I did a lot at first, eventually I kind of got used to it to an extent, but some days I still can't help it. They were all also really nice to other's despite their pain and they asked about how others were doing with whatever the condition happened to be, and would share a bit after checking in with them first. They seemed to put other's struggles with the condition before their own and it extended to the rest of their life, as well. I kept blaming my body for betraying me and was furious at it, I was soo mad at what I was dealing with that I stopped checking in with the people I cared about, it took a little bit of time of making myself put them first instead of talking about how miserable I was for the entirety of our conversations, but I eventually no longer had to force it because it became natural, and I'm soo happy it did.
@K87 It sounds like you have done a lot of work on subduing your anger and developing compassion.
@soulsings
Yea, it was unhealthy to hold onto such negative thoughts and feelings
@K87 agreed!
