insecure (sorry for my grammar, english is not my first language)
i have been insecure in my life since i was a freshman, i have an acne on my face, its make people keep staring at my face, and its scaring me, im scared by what will they think about me, i dont like how people eyes judging my face— its not like im the one who ask to be like this.
this insecure feeling keep eating myself, i avoid a lot of people, i reject almost all the invitation someone gave to me, i actually want to accept it, but something inside my head just keep telling me to do this. its making me anxious everytime i go out to buy something, i felt like my acne is getting worst and everyone is disgusted by how i look.
when i go out with my friends, i will feel like im the ugliest, everytime we took a selfie, i will stare at it when i got home, just to realize how ugly i am compare to my friends, and this feeling just keep eating my mind.
—i dont want to feel like this, i want to feel normal too, but i cant, now im stuck in the same activity over and over again, i feel like losing myself, i feel so alone.
@seastarcath
I had acne when I was a teen as well. At the time, there were few medications or treatments available, so I wasn’t alone. There were usually a few other kids dealing with the same thing.
I think it must be harder for you because there seems to be fewer kids who have the problem, although there are still a number of them around.
You mention receiving invitations, but rejecting them because of your insecurity related to the acne. Could it be that others are more willing to accept you than you are to accept yourself? If you had a friend with acne, and your skin was clear, would you reject them? I think you might be surprised at how few people are genuinely satisfied with how they look. Those same people are far more accepting of the appearance of others.
I also think people worth knowing are 100% focused on what kind of person/friend you are, rather than the existence of your temporary skin condition.
Might it be worth giving others an opportunity to appreciate you for who you are? After all, they probably want to talk to you, not your acne. There’s a good chance that one day, the acne will be gone, but friends may still be there for you.
thank you for your reply
im working on it, i try to go out with some of my close friends, dared myself to go out of the house without having to cover my face, and i try to ignore all the judging gaze i got from other people
hope that one day I can be more confident with myself. :)
I too feel insecure cause I have acne and people stare at me like I'm different, like I wouldn't change myself I could.
Hope your friends don't make you feel bad, we can be friends too if you want.
sending love for u <3
i hope one day we all can have a better skin, and i hope you will always feel confidence no matter how you look or how people looking at you, I know you having some hard time, because I feel it too, so i wish u healthy and happy forever 🤍
yeah im okay, i have some of my close friends who wont judge me by how i look, theyre the sweetest.
@seastarcath I've been and still am insecure of many things... I've always been overweight for my age... and been bullied because of it, I know how you must be feeling about acnes I get those for them please take small steps... like changing a habit maybe washing face twice a day? It helps really. Comparison can be tough when dealing with insecurities but I think we can only try our best not too?❤️ and know you're special and remember if someone judges you based on ur looks... It's often them then the problem not you. I wish you the best! And sending lots of love to you <3
thank you, yes, i already try a lot of skincare and always washing my face, but somehow its just doesnt go away, but i know one day i will get rid of it, i hope so. thank youu so much, your words means a lot to me, love you too ❤️
@seastarcath its unfortunate that in situations like these when people ought to show you non judgment and compassion they give you hate... but not everyone is like that... there are also kind people.
I had acne and yes some people made me feel terrible while others shared their own experiences and the help they found and guided me to the best treatment..
What I learnt from the experience was to connect deeper with my inner self.. because the outer will keep changing.. sometimes it will be endorsed by others and sometimes not.... that can't be our hook to live life on... hook on to values of courage compassion patience and acceptance as those are the real characteristics of a person's worth .... body is a vessel we have been given to take care of in the best way ...and also appreciate whatever it does for us... when we feel good inside, no matter what others say, we find ourselves beautiful on the outside as well... not in need of anyone's validation.... it may sound like too big a milestone to achieve but trust me with perseverance it can work and does work for people!! This experience will hopefully connect you to something deeper within you... and your skin will get better too with right medication and diet. (Please seek progessional advice on that).
You're not alone. We all go through these struggles. ♥️
@fossilfellow @winner8919
thank you so much, your words really made me tear up somehow 😅 i appreciate this.
and i already do some diet and use some skincare, my skin get a little bit better than before, i will continue this until i get rid of all these acne.
thank you so much again, i love u ❤️
Imagine how convenient if there were a way to see through people’s appearance and behavioral facade, and actually discern their character?
You’d discover those who “act nice” while in reality, they’re vain, superficial and selfish. Then you’d be spared the heartbreak of believing in and caring for them only to end up being hurt.
Actually, there is a way. Although it’s not foolproof, it’s often useful. The tool: appearance.
All you have to do is appear in some way different than the current “social standard” of what Hollywood and advertisers say you should look. Maybe you’re too short, too tall, have a skin condition, above “acceptable” weight, not have the most current style of clothes, feel shy or awkward, in fact anything that sets you apart from the “herd,” can serve as a “character filter.”
That’s not to say that everyone who fits the “social mold” is a superficial person. Not many think about it, but good looking people are often judged by appearance as well. For some, attractiveness = conceit, vanity, poor character. In a way, they have a double whammy because they often find themselves surrounded by fake friends, and at the same judged negatively and rejected unfairly by others.
From what I can gather, very few, even among the “beautiful people” are satisfied with their looks, and very many are concerned that others are judging them by their appearance.
I think maybe the happiest people are those who’d say, “this is exterior of who I am. If you don’t approve, take a hike.”