I don't know if I consider him a friend
Recently, I made plans to have small get together for my birthday. I originally planned on having the small gathering at a restaurant which have video games. Looking at my budget though, I decided to move the event to my house.
One of my friends originally said yes but then turned around and said no. However, he did not bother to talk to me. So when I reached out and expressed how I felt, he said that he was choosing a Halloween party over my event. "Plus I want to wear a costume." He also proceeded to blame it on me for changing the date and that he wanted to have some more choices.
At that point, I told him "You're flakiness is not my resposibility. I also need you to understand that my feelings are hurt.
Him: I don't want to lie to you
Me: I see you for what you are. Your behavior seems very narcissistic to me and to be honest, I think you're fake.
Him: Is there anyway I can make it up to you?
Me: No
Him: I hate that we are fighting again
Me: I am not interested in arguing with you
Him: Look, I told you the truth. What more do you want?
@Summershy
I feel very upset because at this point, I don't feel comfortable by inviting him to anything.
@Summershy I'm so sorry you're going through this 🙁 I hope you find helpful insights here 🍀 and things start to feel a little lighter 🤍 You're not alone, and you truly matter ❤️ Sending lots of love your way 🐾💕
@fossilfellow
Hi:
Thanks for your support. I ended up deciding to go no contact with him because he also showed me how toxic he really is. For one thing, he never bothered to apologize when I called him out. Instead, he managed to attempt shifting the blame through gaslighting. This where he kept claiming that I had changed the date which I never did. He also kept trying to manipulate by guilt tripping and using "I go to your things all the time," and making it seem like I was being needy and ungrateful. However, he seemed to come to my things out of obligation and always seemed to have another event lined up.
That being said, I was eventually able to shut him down. This happened when he attempted his little gaslighting narrative for the umpteenth time. That point I said, "I hear you. However, I feel like you made a commitment to me first." I also set boundaries about him coming to my event before realizing that he had been gaslighting me. This was where I said that if he is going to say yes on mty invitations to make sure that is a final decisions. Otherwise, please say no. However, he stopped responding after that.
@Summershy ❤️❤️❤️
