Traumatic Experiences Community Check-In 29 June 2020
Traumatic Experiences Community Check-In June 29, 2020
Good morning everyone!!! The topic of todays check-in is self worth. Not to be confused with self-esteem which is equally important. Self-esteem is what we think and feel and believe about ourselves. Self-worth is recognizing we are greater than all of those things. There are various ways for an individual to assess their worth and value themselves as a human being. Some are more psychologically beneficial than others.
A first step in improving ones self-worth would be to stop comparing oneself to others or evaluating our every move. Put differently one would need to challenge that critical inner voice we all have. That critical inner voice is like a nasty coach in our heads that constantly nags us with destructive thoughts towards ourselves or others. This internal dialogue of critical thoughts undermines an individuals sense of self-worth and can even lead to self-destructive or dysfunctional behaviors, which ultimately work to make one feel even worse about oneself. One can however challenge the inner critic and begin to see themselves for who they really are, rather than taking on its negative point of view about themselves. As individuals we can evolve from the ways we were seen in our family of origin and begin to understand and appreciate our own feelings, thoughts, desires and values.
Practicing self compassion is a good practice that works towards improving ones self worth. There are three steps to practicing self-compassion:
1) Acknowledge and notice your suffering.
2) Be kind and caring in response to suffering.
3) Remember that imperfection is part of the human experience and something we all share.
One can add meaning to their life by taking part in activities which they feel are important as another great example of how to build self-worth. Helping others, for example, offers a huge boost to ones sense of self-worth. Generosity is good for us, both physically and mentally, and studies now show that volunteering has a very positive affect on how people feel about themselves.
Acting on principles, in ways that we respect, is another important quality to foster as we develop a higher level of self-worth. When our actions do not match our words, we are more vulnerable to attacks from our critical inner voice and less likely to respect ourselves.
By challenging ones critical inner voice and refusing to compare ourselves to others, we can begin to get a grasp of our own self-worth. By pursuing activities that are meaningful to us as individuals; acting in line with our own personal beliefs, we can develop our sense of self-worth in ways that we could have never imagined. So I will end todays check-in by asking the following questions.
1. How are you feeling today?
2. What does your inner voice tell you the most?
3. What activities could you think of to improve how you treat yourself?
4. How would you go about bringing joy to others around you?
As always I hope you all have a greater today than yesterday in hopes of a better and brighter tomorrow!!!
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@Understandingempath Hey - How are you?
Idk - I feel alittle sad - Sort of lost in the old messages replaying in my head and they mostly deal with that critic - that hateful part - that feeds all my insecurities - that one that makes me doubt everything I say and do
So - lol - wow - how much time do you have? Mostly - I hear that I'm a monster. That I need to be quiet because I'll only end up hurting someone with something I say or do. That I deserve to be alone and that I deserve everything I got. That noone cares - why would they? Noone cares about the monsters. I waste peoples time and my words mean nothing. I could go on - but - seems melodramatic
I do try to do good things - I try to walk gently into the lives of others. But I worry about if my influence is bad for them. If my words do more damage then good. I try to be supportive of them. I know I have more compassion for other people then I do myself - and I can support them but I'm uncomfortable with getting support from other people. So Lol - I have no idea
Most of my interaction with people is here - But I do try to make people feel heard and understood. I like making people laugh and feel good about themselves - I'd like them to not feel so alone - but then I end up isolating myself so - I guess I'm kind of the suportive ghost - making my prescence known sometimes - to let them know someone cares
Thank you for the checkin :) I hope you have a good day
@mytwistedsoul
Good morning! I am doing really well today thank you for asking. I am sorry to hear that inner voice is causing so much turmoil for you. I was torn on doing the topic of self blame or self worth and I felt self worth was the better topic to cover. You are not these things that voice says you are. When we communicate I don't see a monster and I feel things are better when you are not quiet. Not many people want to be alone in this world and I'm a firm believer that we don't have to. I've seen how you try to bring joy to the lives of others on this platform and I must say you are good at it. So often I see individuals able to cheer everyone up except for themselves and I would like to see more self care from all of us myself included. I do hope you have a wonderful day today and that the critical inner voice within us all takes a day off. Thank you for participating in today's check-in my friend.
@Understandingempath I'm glad you're doing well today - thank you for your reply. I'm a well spoken monster :) Its just what I've allways been told - you tend to believe something if you hear it enough I guess. I am trying to change the thinking of it - man is it hard
@mytwistedsoul
Youve been so supportive of me. I think you are awesome and definitely not a monster. I think you're wonderful. Please don't say these things. Hugs! I think you are awesome!
@BraveAdventurer Thank you - I'm glad I went down farther on the post because - was racking my brain trying to figure out who you were lol! :)
@mytwistedsoul
i had to change my name for safety reasons.
@BraveAdventurer I remember seeing that thread. I'm glad they let you change it quickly. Those buttons were never given a thought.
You're a nurse? That is so awesome! Thank you for all you do - I can only imagine how stressful that must be - you rock! :)
@Understandingempath
1. How are you feeling today?
2. What does your inner voice tell you the most?
3. What activities could you think of to improve how you treat yourself?
4. How would you go about bringing joy to others around you?
I'm feeling okay today. My inner voice is telling me that I'm capable of doing the tasks that I am going to do today based on past performance. I could do self-care activities to improve how I treat myself.
I would bring joy to others through ongoing validation and support. :)
@SynSavory
Thank you for participating in the check-in today. I do hope today becomes a wonderful day for you. Self care is the one thing I feel most of us could truly improve upon. Mainly because thats where I find I slip the most. I feel you do alot as it is to validate and support others on this platform, and if it were not for your efforts and others on the platform I don't think I would have chosen to do these check-ins. You all inspired me to want to do so.
@SynSavory
yes self care is awesome. I love how you get your confidence from past successes.
@Understandingempath
hi it's Equestrian
1. How are you feeling today?
good working Covid unit so stressed but good
2. What does your inner voice tell you the most?
That I'm unlovable, unwanted, and worthless. But I'm training it to say "brave, strong, loving, and capable of changing the world"
3. What activities could you think of to improve how you treat yourself?
More physical activity. Taking time for hobbbies
4. How would you go about bringing joy to others around you?
smiling. Talking. Listening. Truly seeing them.
@BraveAdventurer
Thank you for doing the great work you do. It can't be easy working the Covid unit. Glad you are feeling good today. You are not worthless or unlovable. Taking time for yourself doing any hobbies is a success. In time we will be able to see more people. Patience is the key to getting past the current stresses of being shut in our homes. Thank you so much for participating in this check-in and thank you again for doing all that you do. It is much appreciated even if you don't hear it much.
@Understandingempath
1. How are you feeling today?
I'm feeling alright, but this week has been crazy! I've been trying to check in with my friends from school and see how they were doing and if they need anything. I've also been trying to get my little brother signed up for kindergarten, and my sister is going off to college so I've been trying to spend some quality time with her and help her with a few last-minute things...and of course, telling her non-stop how proud I am of her and that she's going to do great things!
2. What does your inner voice tell you the most?
It's usually "do better than you did yesterday." I'm super competitive by nature, I'm never satisfied, and I try to be a better version of myself every single day. Another thing is "prove them wrong!" I've been underrated and told I'm not good enough way too many times to count and there have been times when it bothered me more than I could ever say. But slowly, I've learned to challenge those comments and think: Prove them wrong Kevin! I don't want to get revenge on anyone or get back at anyone - all I want to do is do better and make a difference every day :)
3. What activities could you think of to improve how you treat yourself?
Something I'm good at. Me personally, I'm a good athlete, and I've played almost every sport at some point... basketball, football, volleyball, cross-country, golf, baseball, soccer - you name it! Playing sports helps me realize that there are things I'm good at and it helps motivate me when I'm feeling frustrated.
4. How would you go about bringing joy to others around you?
I just try to pick a random act of kindness and do it - send someone a sweet text to make them smile, hold the door for a stranger, especially people who don't want to touch door handles in the middle of a pandemic, play with a kid that's being left out on the playground, and other little things like that! It's not much but it makes a difference!
@Kevinstar
Wow. You truly have such a good heart. I love how you care for your siblings and total strangers. Thank you for being so encouraging and hopeful.
@Kevinstar
You are everything I strive to be with each passing day. Never think you aren't good enough because from what I've just read you're an awesome person as you are. Your siblings are lucky to have a brother like you. Thank you for participating in the check-in today and I hope to see you involved in future ones. Have a wonderful evening my friend!
@Understandingempath
1. How are you feeling today?
Today I had a very bad day but I managed to take care of myself and feel better now .
2. What does your inner voice tell you the most?
Just listen to me , don't be afraid ,I've got this !
Sending my positive thoughts and hugs 🤗 towards you all
Trust me ,follow my lead !
3. What activities could you think of to improve how
you treat yourself ?
Reading , meditation , yoga , walking ,connection with nature .
4 How would you go about bringing joy to others around you ?
For me ,one way of bringing joy to others is Simply by being myself with my positivity ,smiles hugs ,a good joke and some funny stories .
Sending my positive thoughts and hugs 🤗 towards you all !
Worrier22Warrior
@Worrior22Warrior
Thank you so much for participating in the check-in today! I love your enthusiasm and it seems we tackle self care in a similar fashion. Positivity is key to a healthy life. Its nice to hear that your inner voice speaks positively. I am sorry you had a bad day but I admire the fact you worked to turn it around. I love reading your posts and I look forward to reading many more in the future.
@Understandingempath
My pleasure !
Thank you very much , its alway a pleasure to read your threads 😊
Greetings and hugs 🤗 to all of you