Traumatic Experiences Community Daily CheckIn - Sunday 28th May 2017
Good Morning Everyone! 
A big thank you to everyone who took part in our Nature and Wildlife themed Photography day yesterday. Submissions are now over, and the voting begins. If any of you would like to take a look at the fantastic pictures on offer, then head on over to here and cast your votes here!
It's a lovely sunny day here in the UK and I will sure to take advantage of the weather before the bank holiday hits, where its forecast to rain. Don't you just love mother nature at her best LOL
Just wanted to remind you folk that no matter whether your day is good, bad or inbetween, we are here for you :) It would be great to hear how everyone is doing today? The weekend is often a time of relaxation for many, though some of you may be working. What do you like to do on your lazy chill out days? I hope you can find some rest and relaxation for yourselves no matter what you get up to smiley
This check in space is yours, to let us know whats happening in your world. Healing from Trauma is hard work, there are ups, there are downs, there are tears, and there successes and achievements. It can be tough going but always know, we are here for you :) Always reach out if you can for some support for your deserve that :)
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@Avaray @vriska44 @Shadeshack @BeeLeigh @Faeryschild @dancingRainbow45 @Lavendermoonlight @KLM3278 @sujaypai
@sweetMelody95 @jr50 @agreeableKite4304 @PhoenixPatronus @Morfo66 @themainjane @raycascotch
@KatieMoon1 @conscientiousPineapple1782 @Tamba @inventiveOrange1 @Jenna0903 @melliotm @PanamaBanana
@AutumnLeigh @DeborahUK @PuppyLove13 @KristenHR @BradyChay2310 @HearingYourHeart @vriska @TreesandWine
@guyb @chayil @Sharkradio @MKjart @AnnaKateMillerLCSW
Still here. Dont know why but still here.
@inventiveOrange1
Your progress path has you at 'seeking peace' level. And maybe that's what you're doing by being here? Trying to find some peace from your thoughts and feelings? I've not experienced a loss as tragic as you have, but I have experienced loss of loved ones and my, how it hurt. And you don't forget, well I haven't anyway. It still hurts now sometimes that they're not still here, that they can't share those moments in life with me. But, and I hope this doesn't sound insensitive in any way - you still have a life to live.
When I saw my best friend for the last time, she told me to leave all that was happening with her behind me, and go and enjoy myself, (I was heading off on holiday). It's by no means easy to carry on, you'll never forgot your babies, but can you live your life in their honour? Can you be the person you would have liked to have been as their mum? Caring, capable, compassionate, resourceful - what other qualities are in you that you can draw on now? It's a tragedy that your babies didn't get to live their lives. But it would be a greater tragedy if you didn't get to live yours either.
Love and warmth to you ❤️
@DeborahUK. Thank you for your kindness and i am so sorry for your losses.
It isnt easy to carry on when there doesnt seem to be a reason. I am trying just for family right now because i dont see anything beyond that. I never thought i deserved to be a parent and that is part of the problem. This sufferring feels right and i am wrong to want anything different.. Invested all i had into trying for some hope and that has been taken away. Just empty.
@inventiveOrange1
You deserve good things. It pains me to see you say that you never deserved to be a parent. I also kind of get it. I was never able to get over that hurdle either and it's a wound that will never heal so I try not to think about it.
I just hope you can learn to stop punishing yourself. (Kind of hope the same for me too).
Dont give up yet, Orange. ❤
@inventiveOrange1
Are you thinking of the loss of your babies as some sort of confirmation that you didn't deserve to have them in the first place? Oh my love, a miscarriage is such a random event - there's no rhyme or reason to it, but it's certainly not in any way a reflection on your parenting skills or ability. You didn't cause it, you didn't deserve it, it's not a punishment although the pain may feel like it. It's a tragedy, for you just as much as any other expectant mother. I'm so very sorry for your loss.
@inventiveOrange1
I'm happy to see you here!
@MKJart and you mk
Good morning,
I start teaching again today- the kids have been coming by all week to make sure. We're doing watercolors today and I got them each a Russian doll on my vacation. It will be nice to get back in the groove. I feel hopeful today.
@MKJart oohh I havent seen a russian doll in ages. Good luck with the teaching and hope your day continue to be a good one for you :)
Play date with my daughter momentarily, followed by grocery shopping. Fitful, dream-saturated sleep -- was awoken several times by sudden, inexplicable noises from outside. Even though it wasn't the greatest night, I seem to be doing okay this morning.
So we'll go from there.
@melliotm Hope your day with your daughter brings you laughter and some happiness. :)
@dancingRainbow45 :) it truly did. My kid is a total hoot. Has been bestowed with the gift of gab at a very young age -- am infinitely grateful to have actually been in a mental space today where I could ENJOY the time spent together, vs merely tolerate or endure.
Also, she has a rampant addiction to swings (HIGHER, DADDY!), to the detriment of my back.
@melliotm haha dont you just love them LOL glad it went well for you and that you were able to have some quality fun time with her :)
I'm okay. That's it. Just okay. Maybe "fine" is a better word. Either way, I'm kinda just, here. I'm tired. I'm still in bed and I'm tired. I need to do something today cuz I did nothing yesterday.
@BeeLeigh
I was wondering how your day turned out? Though a day in bed if you're tired sounds okay - in fact I'd say it's a mighty fine idea :)
@DeborahUK
I stayed in bed almost all day yesterday. I stayed in bed for about half of today. Then I watched some tv, and worked on a puzzle for a bit, now I'm back to tv. Idk why I'm so exhausted lately. It's not like I'm really doing anything. I did clean a little bit yesterday. Idk. When I was working on the puzzle today I couldn't help but think I made a mistake taking a class this summer. This break has been nice. I need a longer one.
have been sharing lots of time with an little alter it frustrating cuz makes really difficult to balance life or even be motivated too past the point of wanting to do thing on a childs mentality
@Asiam1971 Hi Asiam, perhaps it may be a good idea to have a talk with the little alter about how its fun to spend time with them and do things they enjoy and get to know them, but how as an adult you have adult responsibilities that also need to be taken care of too, otherwise if those responsibilities are neglected long term so too will the little one suffer. Perhaps talk about having some set times? that say for an hour in the morning, afternoon, evening, you choose its their time with you, and then at other times, its the adults time. A bit like how you would set limits with external kids. What do you think?
@dancingRainbow45 we did some chores yesterday and spent time being little, but today we not done anything yet. It doesn't always work out the sharing of the days time.
@dancingRainbow45 wanted to thank you for your post, because even though thing are difficult it helped, we read your post twice to make sure everything was understood and we got some more chores accomplished this eveining.
@Asiam1971 Glad it was helpful for you Asiam :) And sometimes it takes a while to be able to work something out so that everyone feels happy, it takes a few goes sometimes to find the happy balance :)
My husband keeps bringing alcohol into the house. He knows if I drink then he can too. I'm not sure I'm in a place to resist. I took an extra antidepressant because they're probably not working as well right now.
@themainjane That has to feel completely frustrating. I am encouraged by your dtermination to look after your health and your sobriety. It can be realy hard when people aren't in the same place as you might be in regards to wanting to be mindful of your needs needs. Is there any way you can provide a safe place for yoursel f while they are making a dicision to consume the alcohol? I hope the anti depressant helps you in taking the edge off the need to oblige your partners behaivor, having a mood that is depressed certainly could turn out to be an additional trigger you don't need. Is there a way you can communicate with them your concerns and needs. Is he able to here that you would like to join him in his company, but the pressure you feel when he brings alcohol around is making it harder to wan to be in his company?
@Asiam1971
Thank you for your words and concern. It's more a problem of we both drink and one feeds off the other. If I'm doing good he'll want a drink or if he's doing good then I'll want a drink.
Wish we could find that place where we both just cut it out together. We've always had a bizarre relationship pattern because we were young and not in a healthy mind space when we got together and it set up a pattern.
A pattern which is out-dated now.
Think here is monday
. Thank you! Was very motivating...
@dancingRainbow45
I just realized how this works. Today was the first day I saw the littel notifications, so now I know where to look. There's a lot to learn on this site.
@HearingYourHeart There is a lot to learn and to find lol am glad you found us though and welcome :) The checkins are a great place to pop by, to let us know whats happening in your world, to get a little support, to share the achievements of your day etc.
@dancingRainbow45
Thank you!
@HearingYourHeart You are most welcome