Traumatic Experiences Community Daily Check-In: Sunday 2nd February
hello my lovely community! good to see you today 
happy february to all of those who i didnt meet yet - i hope this month has some great moments and experiences planned for you.
Whenever a new month begins i try to set myself some goals or at least clarify what i want to improve on. For me, this month i want to improve myself. I have seen a little exercise on the internet some while ago, where you had to describe your ideal self and it said that this is the first step of becoming this version of yourself. So for today, i wanted to ask you, what would be the ideal version of yourself, or what would you like to work on for yourself? Of course changing your whole identity for an ideal vision is not the goal here as you are unique and great the way you are, but that doesnt mean we are not allowed to figure out our weaknesses or mistakes and improve.
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@AveryLove
I really don't know, I feel like everything is wrong about me, but when I try and think of things or behaviour to change or improve I draw a blank. I feel like I'm kind and respectful as long as I at least get treated like that as well. I don't think I need to exercise more or ear more healthily.
If anything I want to stick up for myself, but I don't know how to either not make it into a fight or just take my stand back and apologize
@Madaraismyspiritanimal
And also, I just want to enjoy myself, but whatever I do, i just feel indifferent or angry, when it doesn't go right
@Madaraismyspiritanimal hi there! it sounds like you want to learn how to stick up for yourself in a healthy way. it seems to me like this is linked to self-esteem? do you feel like you have a good self-esteem and confidence? i noticed that whenever i tend to feel insecure about myself, i dont stick up for myself anymore.
And you want to enjoy yourself but it sounds like you struggle with managing emotions whenever something doesnt go the way you would like it to? I struggle with that as well. Have you tried meditiation or any kind of activities that help your brain and mind relax for some time of the day and clarify your emotions? what do you think about that?
hope you have a lovely day, thanks for checking in.
@AveryLove
I have very bad self esteem and confidence, and I've never learned a normal way of sticking up for myself. Growing up, anything besides yes ma'am, would get me yelled at. So my options became, stay quiet or scream harder than someone else. The latter only really happening when the first didn't feel bearable anymore.
I do struggle with regulating my emotions, but the bigger underlying problem for me seems that I don't enjoy things even if they go as planned, I'm just like; "ok, what's next"
@AveryLove
Hi Avery,
I'm new here this month. I really like this topic though.
I've just started to realise that my surroundings aren't helping me heal so I'd like to work on building some confidence and belief in myself so I can take some positive steps to changing my surroundings.
I hope to find some people that can relate on here.
@AveryLove Greetings Avery, I think this is a very insightful discussion topic to kick off the month of love! This month, I am looking to better myself as well. I specifically want to focus on my impulse control and emotional regulation in order to not make any rash decisions in a vulnerable moment. I want to make wise decisions like wise-mind should in DBT treatment. I am wishing everyone an awesome start to the week! Happy Super Bowl Sunday to all my US friends. I am rooting for the San Francisco 49ers. Feel free to let me know who you guys are hoping to win.
For the month of February, my ideal self would be much more organized and calm! I
My ideal self would be one who did not feel that I have to hide behide a mask who I am and beable to get in touch with who i really was intended to be. I know it sounds crazy but that is where I am.
Most of my friends are routing for the 49er's
