Traumatic Experiences Community Daily Check-in Tuesday 16th January 2018
Good morning all!
The dawn of a new day!. And we don't know how this day will unfold. Sometimes we begin in anticipation of an event we are looking forward to, or a oerson w eare going to spend time with. At other times we wake up with a heavy heart,and even dread. And it may be that the night has been disturbed by dreams and we are unnerved and unsettled. However you're staritng out today,I'm hoping and wishing that self compassion will feature in your day.And inviting you to see what a difference this could make.
"Self compassion is simply giving the same kindness to ourselves that we would give to others." - Christopher Germer.
We know how it is to be compassionate to others.. we sense their suffering and our hearts warm to them. Self compassion often does not come so easily. And even less so for trauma survivors.But is an essential ingredient in healing. In the words of Kristin Neff, a well respected expert on self compassion...."Unlike self criticism which asks if you're good enough. self compassion asks what's good for you."
How is your day going? How is a little self compassion making a difference? How can we support you? Or pop in to say hi! Love to hear from you. This is your space and a safe place.x
@rozie
got triggered today, switched off for a while. doing ok now though
@Tenacity37
*hugs* glad your feeling ok now.. Sorry that you were triggered.. Hope the rest of your day is better.. Much love.. You are strong! 💖
@calmLake1999
I watched ratatouille, and now gradually getting ready for bed
@Tenacity37
Glad you got through and are ok now.."hugs" x
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Hello Hello, Just checking in this morning (veeery early where I am at). A little anxious and stressed yesterday but I hope that today is better! I got some decent sleep last night, which is, as always, nice :)
@weareall1
Yay to a decent sleep last night! Helps to start the day and hoping its a better one for you today. Are you able to recognize the stress nd anxiety early on.. pause and use some coping strategies .. so that it doesn't continue to increase. x
Why would I want to feel safe when I could be freaking out instead *eyeroll* I'm glad you all are here.
@easyMap6620
And we're glad you are here with us too. Stay safe. x
Hey Rozie
My day started with being up all night unable to sleep because my grandson brought that flu bug back in my house after me just getting some better from 3 weeks ago. Then I got a call from his dad saying he had to go get him from work because he was sick. I have told them to not come here if they are sick as my immune system cant handle it. They come anyway. So I made his dad come get him from my house only to start with the symptoms all over again.
I was being mindful and trying to show compassion to my self after all the ER stuff and being sick my self
@scarletPear1945
So good to hear you are taking care of yourself... well done! x
@rozie
idk I feel confused today
@conscientiousPineapple1782
Its ok to feel just as you are. Its ok to feel confused.. we all do at times. We are here with you, if you want to talk it over there are ears to listen and love and support for you. x
@rozie
thank you
@rozie
Hi Rozie and trauma peeps.
This might turn into a rant, apologies.
Been making a few breakthroughs lately, but the one that remains constant in my life is that people want to change others but refuse to look at themselves. I encounter a lot of "fixers". On here and IRL.People I've confided into who I thought would understand my situation, which was hard enough to do... turn around and then bristle up saying stuff like I need an exit plan and we can work on that.
Well... I'm tired of it.
I have an exit plan that I worked out with my psych. I've read the stuff, I have numbers in my phone, now I'm getting my documents in a safe place and that kinda stuff. The stupid freaking thing about this is that people can act so holier than thou about this BS. When y'know...they have a boatload of issues and problems they need to address themselves. Then purposefully fill their lives with chaos or act as some kind of consultant for the good of all humanity that can "fix" or "solve" anything.
Not anyone here, but just people I've encountered in general. It really irks me. Because there's not much else I can do. I'm actively working on the things I need to change in order to be healthy. These "problems"...they take time. It's like trying to rush through a surgery or sickness. "Yeah, let's just make that happen." Tch. Annoying. Just let me figure this out, and know that there's not much I can do until the things actually happen. Yeah- lemme just twist this wrench and BAM! My agoraphobia's fixed! Another twist here, ahhhh...no more social anxiety! Apply some pressure here! And viola, you have a caring, loving friend or family member to confide in or stay with when you were completely alone before.
I just wish people would look at themselves, would look at the why and how of what they do. Show some compassion to themselves towards their issues instead of hiding it away like poop in a jar. Additionally, I wish they'd be more compassionate on these kinds of issues with other people. We all have our own circumstances, damn it.
@CaloenasNicobarica
Well done with the breakthroughs! Thank you for what you've shared today.. think some of us and maybe many of us will relate to what you are saying. Coming across the "fixers', the ones with the solutions, who are well meaning and want us to be ok.Yes its annoying and can be upsetting too. How can they know what its like on our journey? have they walked in our shoes? Wondering if its more that they're not comfortable around us, not with our pain, not with our issues. So if they can fix us quickly, we will be ok and then they will be ok. Or as you say look at your own issues first, rather than focusing on mine and helping me, so that you don't have to attend to your own. When we are "helpers' we need to be careful that we are not doing this.
You are right... this journey you are on is going to take time.. as much time as you need. Its a marathon, not a sprint. And its only step by step, baby steps at times. So trust that it will unfold for you, and that there are those who do get it and will support you. And suggest finding a way to cope with the "fixers" that works for you... and we can ask for ways that others have found helpful. That's what's community is about! x
those who do get it and will support you.
So, my therapist asked me before my session if an intern could sit in on my session, and I said sure. She told me I could say no, and that shed had some people saying yes and some people saying no all day. But I said I didnt care. I kept it pretty basic and current throughout the whole session (today is technically the first day of the spring semester, so its not like current has nothing going for it lol), but I did talk the whole time. Maybe a little tooooo much haha. Aaaand, I know its something kinda dumb, but it took me forever to even speak to my therapist, so I think I did pretty well today cuz the other person being in there didnt bother me at all! We mostly talked about school, but also about my cleaning/organizing (because that was sorta actually therapy homework), and thats really about it because I learned today that I actually dont HAVE to take German, but its too late now because literally every class is full. Trust me. Ive looked. My stupid advisor told me I had to and its the one class Im so not looking forward to and now Im fricken stuck in it! 🤦🏼♀️ Anyway, tomorrows garbage day so I gotta get my stuff out to the curb tonight and get rid of some more! :)
Ive made good progress, but itll probably take me another couple of weeks to get everything sorted due to garbage days lol