Traumatic Experiences Community Daily Check-in Tuesday 3rd October 2017
Good morning to you all!
Continuing on with mindfulness as there seemed to be agreement that mindfulness is worthwhile, that it provides an "anchor to the here and now" that It works but you need to stick with it, and when all else fails its something to hold on to. Wizeakre says that minfulness changed her life. And she wrote the following in Thursday's check-in "Something I would say to others going through trauma about mindfulness." ....:
"You are beautiful just the way you are, with all your strengths,faults,and quirks. No matter what you've done, what mistakes you have yet to make.What you went through, what was done to you, isn't you.What happened was real, and it was undeniably painful.Your feelings are valid, and your response to them are natural.You deserve to get un-stuck, to heal, and to have a fulfilling life. Choose yourself. Decide that you are worth it. Then decide again tomorrow and the next day.What you need now is a nurturing, devoted, gentle influence to guide you, to teach you the secrets of contentness and caring for yourself.Did you think you didn't have one? You do. The person who's been with you since you were born, the one you've been protecting all this time. You.If you had that kind of parent growing up, what did they do for you that you could model for yourself now? If you didn't have that kind of parent,now is your time to finally have one.Show yourself the kindness, compassion, and love-without-conditions that the child in you always deserved. Whether we've had those influences in our lives before or not,we're the only people who can fully give them to ourselves now. No one else has the ability to rescue us. They can be the "best supporting actors"in our stories, and they can make us feel happy temporarily,but the masked hero behind the scene was really us all along. The thing we need to realize is, that even without trauma,everyone still needs to be that for themselves. Most never do. Many people go through the motions of life, seeming happy to us, and we compare ourselves to them, but inside they're just jumping from one moment/person to the next,trying to get that sense of fullness from external sources. We try to do what they do and wonder why we still don't feel good.In this way, our traumas can be a unique opportunity. One day you will be able to look back and see how these low moments made you more than you ever thought you could be.Your pain can help someone else's healing. Those hurts can transform into deep insights, and a level of understanding and character that others can only imagine. Take care of your body and take care of your mind. Practice these techniques and over time you'll teach your brain to make them second nature.It will be ok. You have been through so much and you can get through this too.This moment right now is yours. You can do this."
Thank you Wiz for these inspiring words.Hoping there is encouragement here for each of us. And a reminder to practice mindfulness.
How is you day going? How has mindfulness helped you this week? What do you suggest when distressing thoughts seem to be over whelming? Or pop in to say hi and be welcomed to our community. Please take your time to feel comfotable. Love to hear from you.This is your space and a safe place. x
@rozie
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@rozie i cant concentrate to read all this :( i think i get it though
@Jesse9675 Take a step outside your thoughts hon. Use your breathing techniques and still yourself. Slow your roll and read it again slowly. Perhaps use a bookmark or a piece of paper to help you focus on the line you read. Don't get frustrated hon, recognize the need to slow down and take focus, gain what focus and contorl you can and try again. :)
With physical disabillities, some emotional ticks, and even some negative side effects from meds taken, I do my best to see what is going on with myself. I try to understand the nature of my short comming and find a way to either correct it or adapt to it and find a new way to still to the things I need and wsh.
Don't give up hon, get creative. ;)
@Jesse9675
Just take it slowly Jesse. Its okay.. lots of words can be too much....maybe come back to it later. We're glad to have you here with us. x
I am really struggling today. I know I'm safe right now in my own home; but I got so badly triggered yesterday when I was out, and I didn't sleep last night at all. I managed to miss getting my medication picked up. I'm so tired and sad, and I feel a bit confused. I got out of a bad situation yesterday, whereas before I wouldn't have seen the danger signs, so I guess that's good. But right now I feel like I am falling apart. 
@resourcefulPond1641 Im sorry that you were triggered yesterday and are still struggling at the moment. As you rightly say, you are indeed safe in the present moment amid everything that has been stirred up. Try to be as gentle with and compassionate to yourself as you can today as you rest & recover.
We all know that you're doing your best to manage and that's more than good enough. You're not alone and please don't hesitate to keep reaching out for support here as need be. Lots of room in the blanket fort. ⛺
@resourcefulPond1641
Yes remember that you got out of a bad situation yesterday, and as you say wouldn't have noticed the danger signals before, so this sounds like a big step... well done. But after all the effort this would have taken and a poor sleep, its not surprising that you're feeling like this today. So kindness and patience with yourself.. take it easy... and know we are here with you. x
@rozie Thank you guys for the support! I'm starting to feel a bit better now this evening.
Psychiatric appointment this afternoon. Thoughts have been scattered and racing somewhat this morning, despite my attempts to meditate and remain calm and relaxed. Having to manage difficult feelings, but am not entirely sure how to unpack them (or to accept them without resistance).
Doingmy best to cope while stress triggers a symptomatic response. I am safe, no matter what. Now it's a matter of translating that sense of safety from the aspirational to reality.
Because even though I have racing thoughts that make me feel like danger is nigh, and have been feeling overwhelmed lately by stress and life and everything that comes with balancing an overflowing C-PTSD stress cup while trying to navigate through a difficult time of year for me, it is an incontrovertible fact despite it all that I am safe in this present moment. ⛺⛺⛺
Lovely check in today.
Thanks @wizeakre for your beautiful words.
And thanks @rozie for reminding us of them.
@DeborahUK
Thanks Debs! Really apprecaite you for who you are and how you support us here. x
Thanks @rozie
I get as much support as I give - it's the beautiful thing about this community.
None of us are alone.
@rozie
Meow. Those're great words, thought that when reading them yesterday. A lot to learn from other trauma folks here.
Mn. E-mailed my therapist because I feel really...uh obsessed over stuff. Like about my appointment on Thursday. for multiple reasons. 1. The waiting room "bullying", 2. Bringing up marriage counseling to Mr. So-and-so in order to take the heat off of me so much. It's more or less as protection for me in an odd way. So there is uh...things. Gotta do my appointment in a little while, tell them I'm a little behind. However, I plan on finishing up stuff by this time next week. Need to do some mindfulness stuff today. Yesterday I threw up while attempting to do yoga- wonder if my anxiety is peaking? I rarely throw up, but it's usually brought about by being super nervous or sick.
Last Thursday, yesterday!
Whatever, somewhere in time. XD
@CaloenasNicobaricau
Yes agree they are great words! Sounds like you have a lot going on there, so its a good time to up the self care and the mindfulness... try to be gentle and pace yourself.. one step at a time is enough. Do hope you're feeling better now. We are here in support. Hugs. x
How is you day going? Today is going well, working on blogs and made an awesome pot roast.
How has mindfulness helped you this week? I feel I have to keep redoing, it's like resetting my mind. I also have to let things go over and over.
What do you suggest when distressing thoughts seem to be over whelming? Let things go. Make big goals into smaller step by step processest and do something calming.
My biggest problem is waiting between good times and healing.
@Rebekahwriter13
Love the sound of that awesome pot roast! And agree that mindfulness does need to be done over and over and becomes more effective and accessible this way. x
Is it normal to have sexual feelings for someone after a rape? Like 5 months after?