Traumatic Experiences Community Daily Check-in Tuesday 5th December 2017
Good morning all!I
Its late on Tuesday here,and I'm to get up early tomorrow morning, so I'me leaving the page open, and saying who wants to write on it?
And here's somethingto reflect on...
"Family isn't always blood
Its the people in your life who
Want you in theirs, the ones
Who accept you for who you are, the ones
Who would do anything to see you smile
And who love you no matter what."
This is your space and a safe place. Love to hear from you. x
.
I drew a timeline for myself and tried to figure out when I started to disassociate exactly.I feel very lonely lately, not sure why.Will go back to therapy as well and will have a short trip tomorrow so hopefully will be able to be at ease and get some rest during it.
@Morfo66 hey Morfo, hang in there 
Its hard when you feel so alone, and even people surrounded by people can often feel that way too. I think sometimes people feel alone with the issues they have to face and deal with because others can find it so very difficult to appreciate what lifes like for you and the battles you have to manage and cope with day to day.
It sounds like a really good exercise your doing to try and identify the kinds of situations which cause you to dissociation and by being able to identify those, you can also begin to work on staying within that window of tolerance for its often when someone goes outside of this that dissociation could result.
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❤️
@melliotm
hi mellio
@sensitiveShade5337 Hi Shade! 👋
@melliotm
how are you doing? ☺️
@sensitiveShade5337 I'm hanging in there, thanks :) doing my best. Happy to see that you're doing well :)
@melliotm
Keep being strong mellio, things will get better soon, hopefully! And thanks :)
@melliotm Hanging in there Mellio sounds better than feeling as though your drowining and its good to know your fighting on and doing what you need to take care of yourself.
@dancingRainbow45
That's a mouth full of truth
@rozie mm this does resonate with me. but the people ive considered my family for a while now are having a really hard time being there for me lately
@Amenanak Hey Amenak Its sad to hear you feel the people you consider family are having a hard time being there for you right now. That must feel kind of lonely for you? Have they said this to you or is this just a feeling you believe to be happening? I just wondered whats led to you feeling this
@rozie
I like to be there for others... I think everyone deserves love but ofc I have my dearest.
@conscientiousPineapple1782 Im glad Pineapple that you have people in your life that care about you Everyone deserves and needs this and sometimes people get that from friends, or family or from other sources. I think it always makes us feel good to care for others and makes those we care about feel good too
Hello
hope all of you are fine and having a Supper day
@scarletPear1945 Hey Scarlet I hope too that your day goes really well for you :)
My ex and I broke up in Sept 2015 (after a rocky 8 year relationship )
and he had a liver transplant in August 2016
I helped in Dec 2016 until his death jan.
Some days are good, but some days I cannot get over that he is dead. My depression is all over place.
@Rebekahwriter13 HI Rebekah, its always tough losing someone we care about and it sounds like you and your ex went through quite a lot together? Loss is so incredibly difficult and takes a lot of time to come to terms with and I think its always natural to miss people that we loved or valued and wish that they could be with us again. Sometimes I find holding onto all those treasured and special times you spent together help, perhaps those times before you ex was ill and you found yourself almost in a caring role. It can hurt to think of those times but one day you will be able to remember them with less pain
I was literally just talking about this with my friend. It sucked that the guy I was dating broke up with me right before traumatic memories began to resurface, and I wouldve loved to talk to him about it, and it made me want him back. But I realized how there are so many people here at my college who I am really close with who can give me good, if not better, support because I see them everyday. I am so blessed to have good friends who want to see me stay strong.
@disneynerd23 Hey Disney Its so good to hear that you have a good bunch of friends at your college that your close to and who you feel your able to turn to for support. Its always important to feel we have someone we trust and sometimes people not so close to us emotionally are often those that can give us objective points of view rather than someone such as relatives, partners etc maybe giving a more bias or subjective outlook on things. Im glad you have good people around you
@dancingRainbow45 thank you for the affirmation 😊
@disneynerd23 Your most welcome Anytime
I cut myself off from family last year and it has been invigorating. I don't have to fake it through family gatherings anymore. I just don't go.
@JJi Hey JJi, wow that was a big step for you to take and its really good to hear from someone whose had to make that decision, that it can actually make you feel empowered and invigorated as your post mentioned. How was it for you initally? Did you doubt your decision or did you have a few wobbles along the way? Im pleased that it sounds as if this was the right thing for you to do for your emotional wellbeing and it takes courage to do what you did
@dancingRainbow45
HI and thanks for reading. The first time I did not go to an event, I was talked about and disrespected when I saw them again. Those actions helped me understand that I made the right decision. I don't need their negativity. It's detrimental to my health.
@JJi Well done you on being able to put yourself and your needs, including your emotional wellbeing first! And nope your dont need other peoples negativity that is so true
@dancingRainbow45
Thanks.
No one I know understands my reasoning s for not going to family events. Christmas is coming up and I'm debating on whether or not to go. I'm leaning towards not going.
If I were to go to the Christmas dinner, I would be setting myself up for chaos and I can't afford that.
@JJi Perhaps think about what feels right for you and perhaps trust your gut instinct on what to do. If you do decide to go, perhaps plan ahead on how to avoid conflicts and chaos and what you can do during that time to take care of yourself
@dancingRainbow45
Great tips. Thank you. I will take that into consideration.
@JJi Sometimes planning ahead, envisaging the kinds of situations you may encounter and have to deal with can enable you to build up a list of ways to cope with them even if its take a walk, get space from the situation :)
Today. Has been a hard day. The past three months have been some of the hardest in three years.just need to keep pushing through as always. Just keep my eyes forward towards my goals.