Makes no sense...
Hi,
I have absolutely no idea where to put this post because I barely know what I'm doing to type yet.. trying to figure things out in my head.
I know I experience depersonalisation and derealisation, sometimes sensory overload can cause this, sometimes other things. They have said it may be a trauma response, but I don't believe it is.
Yesterday, I was in hospital for mental health reasons. When the ambulance crew came, I was aware, but then I seem to be missing a period of time as I snapped back when mum tied on my shoes. I was awake, but not there. I had to assume they were taking me in because of what they were saying, but clearly missed a conversation. I think I heard voices during this time.
The same happened in hospital. I vaguely remember a doctor coming in and she wanted to examine me and then i don't remember. When I was next aware, there was my one to one nurse in the room and the lights were off which they hadn't been. Again, wasn't asleep. Again, think I heard voices during this time.
I am also trying to explain to my mental health teams and ask questions.
Firstly, without having DID, can disassociation be long term, like a month, two week break, then back into it?
It seems like some kind of disassociation is causing non-thought based crisis, not being connected to reality, or to myself causing need to scream, causing needs to sh, causing needs to do worse. I guess that if disassociated, my thoughts and feelings are spiralling but I'm unaware of that?
Does this make any sense to anyone?
Not even my camhs support people seem to get it. Some I haven't explained.
@CalmCoral First of all, I think your post is in the right place 😉
I am not an expert, but I've read about dissociative disorders in the current diagnostic manual, DSM-5-TR, and I can summarize what it says.
Depersonalisation, derealisation, missing periods of time, "awake but not there" and so on are symptoms of a dissociative disorder. There are several dissociative disorders, and DID is only one of them. Another one is called "Chronic and recurrent syndromes of mixed dissociative symptoms", and to me that sounds pretty much like "a month, two week break, then back into it".
The trauma issue is less clear. The manual says, "the dissociative disorders are placed next to, but are not part of, the trauma- and stressor- related disorders, reflecting the close relationship between these diagnostic classes." This seems to imply that it's thought to be a trauma response or a stress response, but maybe no one is really clear about it. Your other recent post indicates severe stress, it seems to me (but I am not an expert), so that stress seems like it could be the cause.
So yes, this makes total sense in terms of the stuff I've read. I agree that dissociation could make you unaware when your thoughts and feelings are spiralling.
When CAMHS* support people don't get it, that's very difficult and disappointing.
*Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services, or something like that.
Charlie
@RarelyCharlie
Thank you for your reply. Slightly complicated but I'll process it 😃 so pleased I made sense. It's such a weird, horrible feeling. Maybe I'll bring up some of what I've said, and you've said with camhs next time. Thank you ❤️
