The Warrior System

My system wrote this and is allowing me to share because we would really like to find a listener (or a provide info for a listener that already talks to us. Maybe this post will make it easy to talk when we're experiencing rapid switching.

My name is Alex, I’m 23, in a system of at least 17. We’re feeling really lonely lately. Not internally, but in the world. Like we don’t fit in, like we don’t have any friends and like know one really knows us, or if they do know us, they don’t want all of us to exist, just the host. I decided to write this post because while we’ve been open about DID, it feels sort of like “coming out of the closet” so to speak. I’m a protector. Well, some people wouldn’t think of me as a protector because sometimes I’ve been known to do things that are harmful to the body, but I just didn’t want the littles to have to go through more pain. I don’t hurt us anymore though because I realize all it does is cause the littles to feel more sad and traumatizes them even more than they already are. Other parts want to introduce themselves too.

Hiiiiiiiiiiiiii! I’m Elsa! I’m 7. I like to watch Frozen a lot, it makes me happy when I feel sad. Alex and Paige won’t let me share a lot, but I wanted to say hi.

Alex again, Paige is one of our other protectors, she’s what you may think of when you think of an over-protective angry teenager. She’s 16. She doesn’t really like to front unless she has too. She’s gotten our system in a lot of trouble before. Truth be told, both of us have so we’re working on working with the host a bit better to make sure that we don’t get in trouble anymore.

In our system there are 4 littles, there’s Lily who’s three. Mia is 5 and Elsa is 7, and Sarah is 9 (though Sarah says she wants a new name, she says she can be Cryssie–maybe). There’s also a bunch of teenagers. Nicole age slides she’s between 11 and 13 but she doesn’t front much. Then there’s Paige who is 16. Then I have Peyton and Kimberlie who are both 17 but way different. Peyton is the creative, artsy introvert and Kimberlie is the hyper, athletic extravert that helps the system be social. We also have Faith who is 18, she is angry at our dad for all the trauma he put us through. Then there’s some of us in our 20s. There’s Jayden, they are 22, they go by they/them pronouns and their dream is to live in a cabin in the woods with our dogs, and she would be totally fine never seeing another human again. Then there’s me, Alex, 23. We also have Skye and Braelynn, we don’t really know how old they are. Skye is obsessed with spirituality and doesn’t always believe we are human. Well, she mostly believes that her soul is different than the rest of us and she’s lived lifetimes on other planets. Then there’s Braelynn, she’s a part that allows us to work and act normal, we think she’s about 28. There’s also Wrynn, they’re ageless, they’re kind of like the gatekeeper and allows parts to front and keeps memories sealed until we’re ready. Wrynn isn’t a she/he/they, they are genderless, but I’m using they because I don’t know what pronoun to use.

We’ve identified other parts in therapy, but these are the ones that are most common to front.