Financial Trauma 💵

@janesoma Congratulations on reaching a place of financial security! This is something you are unused to, and I understand if it makes you uncertain. Do you have a savings account or another project into which you can direct your funds?

@janesoma congrats on reaching your financial goals.

@janesoma thank you for sharing your story so openly. I can only imagine how difficult it must have been to experience financial betrayal from someone so close to you, especially during such formative years. That kind of trust being broken, along with the weight of debt, can leave lasting emotional scars, and it makes complete sense that you're feeling these mental blocks now. 

It’s really inspiring that despite everything, you’ve built a business. I hear you when you say it feels paralyzing to allow money to come directly to you. When you've spent so long providing for others or reinvesting elsewhere, shifting that mindset can be really challenging. But you deserve financial security and success just as much as anyone else.

I’d love to hear more about what you're hoping to build with your new business. Also, have you found anything that has helped you even in small ways? You're not alone in this, and I'm really glad you're here. 🚀

@janesoma congratulations, one of the best feeling in the world for achieving the goal. heartiest congratulations on this. Dont worry about the trauma and all it was all your part of your journey and the path you came from. 

Hello everyone,

Thank you to @PeacefulWords2025 and @lovelyCloud5919 for commenting on this thread recently. It’s crazy that I posted this back in 2019, shortly after I joined 7 Cups. I recommended 7 Cups to a friend the other day, which prompted me to consider speaking with listeners again on personal finance. So what a coincidence to come across this thread! Figured I'd share an update with all of you. It’s interesting to reflect on how far I’ve come, yet I’m still learning!

I believe it was early 2021 when my mom started paying me back for my loan. She mailed pre-dated checks to pay me $1000 a month until she paid me in full. Initially, I was surprised and emotional because I never expected her to pay me back. The first check she wrote me included a note that ended with her saying, “You’re a good daughter.” I cried when I read that line. But later, I was enraged by it. In August of that year, I decided to visit my family. I hadn’t seen them since 2019 due to COVID. I’ll spare you the details, but by the end of that trip, I made a conscious effort to estrange myself from my family. I felt that trip finally gave me the permission to move on and unapologetically focus on myself. I have done and learned everything I needed from my biological family. My decision was sound and complete.

In the following years, I have developed a pragmatic perspective on my decision to maintain distance from my family. I’m very content with my life today. I consider it well-balanced. I share a healthy lifestyle and business with my husband. I have healthy friendships, and, overall, I consider my mental health to be good. I forgive my family without feeling the need to reconnect with them. I have continued to talk to the same 7 Cups therapist since December 2021. I read the book Mastery by Robert Greene last summer, and I feel that his teachings of pursuing my vocation continue manifesting in my life. There’s not much I don’t like about my life. I consider myself very blessed.

It's funny reading my message here from November 2019. Like most businesses, ours (my husband and I) continues to have its ebbs and flows. We continue to fail forward and learn through trial and error. We’ve revised and updated systems and have had colleagues and contractors come and go. I have started my own business endeavors that, at minimum, have made enough to cover overhead, but not enough for me to consider them supplementary income. However, I’ve been making significant shifts in the last six months.

In October 2024, I went back to school. Although I’m self-taught in my vocation, I found an amazing distance learning school, and I felt ready for a formal education.  Then, in the first quarter of 2025, I hired two ghostwriters to help refine my messaging for my business endeavors. It requires a lot of my mental energy to work with my ghostwriters, but I’ve never had more clarity and confidence in my life. At the very least, I’m finding my voice — a voice I’m confident will propel me to make more money than to cover overhead. 

At this point, I wouldn’t say I have mental blocks when attracting money directly. I don't consider myself financially struggling with the business I run with my husband. But I share all this because I want to continue practicing self-awareness, actively ‘stay on course,’ and not take my journey for granted. I want to continue normalizing conversations around financial growth and the pursuit of mastering my vocation. Lastly, I want to attract like-minded, growth-oriented people. I’ve heard it said that to have the things you’ve never had, you have to do the things you’ve never done. Part of that is to continue to associate with those who bring out the best in me. 

So, to everyone who has responded to this thread! You have played a part in my personal growth!

@janesoma

Thank you so much for sharing your story so openly. It takes a lot of courage to speak about financial trauma, especially when it’s tied to family and deep emotional layers. I really resonate with what you said about feeling like a pathway for money rather than a recipient. You're not alone in that, and I'm really glad you're here.

@janesoma

Thank you for sharing your story so openly. That must have been really hard to go through. 

It’s really strong of you to have come this far, to rebuild and start yourself fresh! 

You are definitely not alone here, grateful you are part of this space and for sharing something so honest, it gives others strength too! 

@janesoma Congratulations on reaching your financial goals! that’s amazing!