I'm desperately hoping healing is possible

The man who raised me is not my biological father but he was always my dad. He was there for as long as I can remember. And when I was little he was a good dad but when I got older I dont really know what happened but he became really abusive. He was physically abusive towards my mom. And he was mentally and emotionally abusive to me for years and years. He reminded me almost everyday that I'm worthless. He punished me for the dumbest things; I once got in trouble for breathing too loud. Over the summer he got mad at me for not having done enough laundry that day and having an attitude and he threw some stuff at me and then choked me. After that my mom decided that was it and we left. And my mom is a good mom but shes unknowingly hurtful and draining. I dont think its intentional. But she gets so mad over small things, she screams at me for not working enough so I work more and then she screams about my grades slipping. I had to drop out of my clubs and sports this year because she didnt wanna drive me, but then I got in trouble for not being involved enough. Tonight I was on edge, rough day at work, it was 11pm and I asked if we could stop to get a pop and she was drunk and went off and I couldnt stop myself from crying. Which made her yell more, that im irrating, that me crying is like nails on a chalk board, she hates that im like this. And I held it back until my teeth were chattering, I couldnt breathe, my head hurts. But Intel on the edge of breaking down. I need to cry.