bad experience at 9, only just getting over it 7 years later.

i had a bad experience when i was 9 which resulted in self harm and severe depression, and resulted being on and off cutting for 6 years where i eventually hit rock bottom age 13 which was basically 3 years ago now, where I sadly tried to end my life multiple times with bleach etc, however i've gotten better but occasionally i still get sad and when I do they're usually verryyy sad and low places and its so hard to not resist the urges of falling back to my old ways. But even though I get the occasional downfall I've realised it does get better, and trust me I hate that phrase and much as you reading this probably do, but it came to a moment in my life where there it changed. there wasn't a day where this event wasnt replaying in my head, it wasin my dreams, stop me in my tracks during the day from a random thought, i wouldalso be most nights for years crying myself to sleep still distraught and suffering many years on, so 4 years after the incidentwhen I really didn't think it got any better I drunk bleach, and thank god that it didn't do too much damage to take away my life as my 13 year old self wanted-because looking back then I am much happier, these thoughts disappeared after 7 agonising years, I can live my life now with a clear head all because of talking to someone about my experience, it all floats away and doesnt effect you anymore and i never would of ever believed when i was 9 that i would still be here at 16 and smiling and enjoying life more than ever, trust me it really does get better, maybe not right away but you will know when the time has come and trust me its the best feeling in the world.