trauma on making friends & being around a bully
i used to have some friends but they'll end up leave me after a while. lots of them do. since then, i got a quite huge trauma on making new friends.my mom keep forcing me to make more female friends, since i mostly befriend boys. I told her that i just could not make anymore friends, but she didn't understand my trauma.
i also had this weird trauma of being around my bully. every time i see her, it terrorizes me and i just ran away. i felt scared that she might bully me again, even though she had stopped. In fact, she and her friends still give me disgust looks anyways.
is there a cure for this? i always feel like i am hunted by my bullies. and i feel extremely uncomfortable when i had to make new friends.
@Hydrangea03 So sorry this post never got attention. I looked at your profile and seen you are still semi-active in this community, so I decided to give my reply. Hope you see it :)
It sounds like you've had a bad string of luck with friends and friends leaving you, so you might have a preconception that other people will leave you if you befriend them. And then your mother would like you to have more girl friends, however you befriend boys more. Ask yourself, why that is and if it's a problem in your eyes.
Finally, I can completely understand your emotions around a bully. When someone makes your life harder or perhaps is a negative actor in your life, you tend to therefore have the matching negative feeling towards this individual.
You're looking for a cure to the "norm" of people leaving you have created in your head, and I would say the best path to treating this false conception and fear is to face it and realize the difference between reality and fear. Is it true that everyone, without knowing you, would leave you? What's their reason to? There is a self help guide on bullying if you'd like to take a look at that, but hopefully since this post, you have reached out to a listener or two and talked about this. Let me know how you're doing currently and if this is still an issue :)
@HelpfulNick95 hello there! Thank you so much for your kind words...:) I'm very sorry I have just seen this now - I've been taking a break for a while but now I'm back <3
@Hydrangea03
Sorry you had to experience this. I, too, have been a victim of bullying, and I know how challenging of an experience that it is. Stay strong, and hoping things get better for you.
@humorousThinker396 hi!! things have gone surprisingly okay for me :o i hope you're the same!!!
