I’m struggling… how do I break the loop 😭
I’ve never had it easy…and I’m hurting I can’t escape no matter how much I try to change…
This is a trauma dump
parents We’re police offices and we’re very strict often yelling at us like we were in the military.
From a young age (7) I was hurt my baby sitter touched me to prove he wasn’t gay. A hurricane happened that same year, a snow storm, my neighbor shot our dog, and we moved to the other side of the country and had to give up our cats (they were old and wouldn’t handle to the move) (I was also 7 and had no choice in that).
things never got easier, I fell behind in school and was bullied by my little brother who would punch me and kick me, I would go to school and get bullied there I have a metal disorder (I think brought on by trauma). I was pulled from that school in grade 4 and was continued to be bullied in a smaller school.
then my grandmother died
started to get hurt by my cousin and that went on for 5 years till I spoke up, my own father didn’t believe me and still hung out with them. I now walk in fear of getting hurt again and no one believing me.
went to high school and was bullied relentlessly I had a milk shake thrown at me while sitting under the stairs…. A girl in my class ended her life someone who I looked up to… my mental health got worse a lot worse…
I can feel myself blocking things out now I don’t remember a lot anymore….
i moved out a couple years ago and have lived in poverty since… these past couple months have gotten particularly bad… I live in a bad area I’ve been followed home 3 times I’ve been robbed, I’ve had my car stole and it’s window smashed my cat and dog have gotten sick (they are my number 1 priority and I do everything to make sure they are okay) my partner came out and told me that they had a thing for their dad and brother and they are non bionary (which is fine it’s just a lot of change) I’ve moved to a safe neighbor hood… but I can’t escape this life
I CANT ESCAPE
how do you escape the loop?!?
@tallWatermelon9473
One escapes the loop by doing something totally different ........ focus on good items not dwelling on all the bad that has come your way ........ if you say to yourself ... look at all i came through that would have made others quit but i am still going .....
life changes sometimes takes us out of comfort zone .......focusing only on bad or drama in your past .. IMO acts like a magnet for more....
if what you have been doing is NOT working .........doing it again and expecting different outcome is unrealistic ......... emulate the life you want ........you can find a way out of a loop
@tallWatermelon9473 Hi Hi Thank you for saying that. I saw it. It's hard to fight those memories, but it's a good sign that you're willing to start. I don't know how to express my concern to you, we may be far away from each other, different countries. 🖐🏻🖐🏻❤️❤️❤️💖💖