I need to forgive
I don't know what it means to/for me right now. I haven't a clue how to do it. But I need to! Desperately!
I'm tired of holding on so tightly to all the anger, pain, resentment. All this misery because a monster abused me and I was just a kid.. I just wanted to be a kid and he stole that from me. I don't know how to move forward but holding on is making me sick.
I have so many issues because of what happened. Boundary issues, being so extermely passive/a people pleaser, not taking responsibility for my own life and always expecting others to save me(sometimes literally, because suicide attempts).
I need to take care of myself better, and I haven't been. I need to understand what I need, what's best for me, and do those things. Self-care and all.4
I don't want to fogive for HIM. But rather, for ME. Because I DESREVE some peace. Some happiness, and I will never get there like this, I'll never move on with my life and be content or anything until I release all this negative energy associated with what he did to me.
How the heck do I do this? How do I forgive?? What has helped you do so? Please help!
@CristineK23 for me it really helped the realisation that forgiveness is not about approving the behaviour of the other person or forgiving them, but rather the peace to make with yourself to move on. Also talking with my friends about my situation, feeling supported and heard. I am here virtually supporting you on this journey of forgiveness :)
@CristineK23 well what I experienced was that it is not about them but rather it is about you. You want to feel free from the resentment and anger right? I can tell you right now that forgiveness will help and there is a self help guide present here on 7 cups that will teach you the REACH" process that can lead you to forgiveness😊
There's a new therapy called compassion focused therapy that deals with forgiveness. The techniques are simple enough to use as a self help method. But it does mention that forgiveness takes time and can't be rushed. There are several books on Amazon if you're interested.
@CristineK23 I am right there with you. I'm learning as well, but I just wanted to show some support. We've got this!
