I suppressed this for a while.
My boyfriend of two years raped me repeatedly while we were dating. He made me feel worthless. I don't know how to handle it anymore. I suppressed it for two years after the break up and it only came to the surface recently. I knew the way we had "sex" was wrong. He hurt me and now he lives in my neighborhood. And I just want to know someone out there can help me. I know I can't go to the cops but I can't keep living in this constant fear of leaving my apartment.
@Lexizzlegood I am sorry you are a victim of domestic abuse. No one should have to go through that. The trauma of that can reach us even when the abuser is far away. Trauma can affect our lives when the abuser is near. Sounds like you do not feel safe in your house. What other family, friends or agencies might help you? There are many support organizations for victims of abuse. Hope you find one not too far away.
You may find a 1-1 chat may be helpful if you feel talking about how you feel might be helpful.
Another option is one of the self help guides.
https://www.7cups.com/domestic-assault-survivor/
https://www.7cups.com/traumatic-experience-help/
A traditional approach to healing might also include a therapist or psychiatrist. Again sorry for the pain and suffering you endure. But there is a way out. We all have the answers inside us even if someone else must listen while we find them.