Weird problem stemming from possible childhood sexual abuse (trigger warning, its gets a lil nsfw)

Hi all,

I'm really embarassed to be posting something like this, but I'm not ready to talk to my therapist about it. So, my "weird problem" is that in scary/dangerous situations my body gets sexually aroused? My mind is not, but my body is reacting differently.. I feel deeply ashamed about this and I swear I'm not "turned on" by danger or anything, but theres always a bodily reaction in scenarios like this. For example, last week someone was driving recklessly behind me and I think he was drunk. He started swerving behind me and getting extremely close to my car!! I pulled over to the side of the road and he drove past and screamed profanities at me out the window. I was very frightened at the time and I thought that he'd get out of his car and attack me. And my body became aroused but my mind was terrified. I think this might stem from possible sexual abuse in my childhood. I don't have any explicit memories of being assaulted, but the more I remember stuff about my past and the more I learn about myself in therapy, I'm starting to think something very bad happened. I hate being touched, it feels invasive and like I'm under attack. I'm slowly (but surely!) working on getting comfortable with platonic touch. I also have really bad depersonalization and derealization that I'm having a harder time snapping out of. I don't know if this problem has anything do with something like that, or if its a completely mundane thing, but it really bothers me that this happens. I can't control how my body reacts and I can't get over the feelings of guilt that come after. Does anyone deal with something similar to this? Is it normal for your body to react like this even if it's not what you actually want?