Against my own promise to myself
Hey ok so I went against everything that I swore to myself for the past few months maybe years I can’t tell anymore how long it’s been that I would actually tell my real emotions to another person again. I did today to my therapist and my best friend. I made this promise to myself bc I’m in recovery for codependency, grief trauma etc bipolar, and Lord know what else. But I was doing ok for a while…
For a good 2 years anyway to get to the point I suffer from severe anxiety and ptsd as well and just got out of an emotionally and verbally abusive relationship to a drug addict. Sorry… point…my son passed away from SUDC and things got really wonky for a while.
I got out of the relationship away from the abuse but not away from all the dark thoughts.
i am so anxious and I’m hyper manic right now w mixed episodes it’s a scary ride but I shared today and it’s dark and I asked my therapist to call my psychiatrist because I needed help explaining to him what’s going on bc I haven’t really seen him in a couple months so he not really “ up to speed “ like my therapist.
im holding everything back to not text her to not contact him. Because let’s face it. It’s easier to fake it. It just becomes reality eventually and as always this too shall pass as each season does it idk maybe my therapist telling me all about being real and not acting would actually work out but like I said in earlier thread sharing is hard
@Neen1107 Hey bro, no need to be that depressed, and you can ddfinitely get much better. You know what, in your situation, perhaps exercising is the best way to get yourself back up. It helps releases anxiety and stress which gives you more motivation to do things. Whta's more, explain things you have trouble with; don't just keep them to yourself. Face the truth, but try to like it. When you look at things from a more positive perspective, it can be much better. After all, you are still unbeaten, aren't you?
