Cold calm morning

This morning is too calm, like nothings really happen,

It makes me feel like empty, same like the last night, 

the day feels more cold even everything is going on,

But Nothings again feel better even I was out to see something happen. 

The roads seems so silent and the sunlight feels burning on my skin.

So I am moving on my way to see what will next happen.

And that's how it goes,

The night ends with the hope of something better for next day, but the morning beginning with the restless thoughts,

of wanting more time to be in bed, 

But don't even feel like sleeping cause of noise in my head.

Then the anxiety came, with the expectations of having better today than ever.

And that's how *** goes.

The hope is still inside that the whole day is on the other side, and something will happen or maybe I have to make it happen.

Then the day starts with pressures to do some works, may I feel better after doing ? but Duudde! I am still struggling to even thinking of it.

Then the plan of day is set, that I will feel the same again, or even worse than yesterday, cause i didn't even prepare to shower.

And that's how it goes!!

Surprise it's afternoon, I take bath, sees it's already time to do those works..again.

Now I am feeling like i am missing out something, the anxiety comes again,

with some more thoughts to be quick cause I am losing out... Time's train.

I paused, I take a deep breath, so I can think about it and to get more clarity,

But personal issues came in and now i am again busy in fighting, 

after beating myself up, I reached to the conclusion of nothing. Well that's how it's again goes.

Then again it's time for some change, that's  my mind says, but the body is still in that phase, where nothing really wants to change. 

I again sit here for a while trying to get some help but it's again goes like that, and nothing really make sense.