I joined 7Cups Because I have no real relationships?
I joined 7Cups Because I have no real relationships? This statement is both a question and a fact. I believe in honesty and accuracy. If I say that I have no relationships then I would imply that I have no relationship with anyone including my parents or people at work.
Let me break it down for you why I want to use the statement: "I have no real relationships."
I am a 45 year old man who still lives with his parents. In all my years growing up, my relationships with other people haven't been very good. It has always been hard for me to make friends, and I have never had a good girlfriend. I feel like I got to say "never had a good girlfriend" because what is a girlfriend anyways? There have been women who have come and gone that I liked. Things never worked out, and we never went on a date. Most of them were just people on the internet that I got to chat with and flirt with. Some of them hurt me. In fact just about all women in my life, except for my mother and grandmother has hurt me, and gone away. The one's who haven't hurt me are people that a little too distant to hurt me.
I'm not a perfect guy by any stretch of the means. I just happen to be a single guy with a sex drive, who has had bad luck in life.
My bad luck started off in 1987. I had flunked kindergarten, and now I find myself in a readiness class. A class that was meant to prepare me for the 1st grade. While I was in this class I was diagnosed with a learning disability. I had no idea that this learning disability was going to define me for the rest of my life. And maybe even be the reason why I was going to end up in an isolating job that I hated with no escape. I didn't know that it would put a target of **** on my back.
People like to pick on me because of my learning disability. It does something to me that causes me to be like: "I don't get it." I'm slow and I can't understand what is going on around me and why.
Back in 2002 I joined the internet social things, that included dating sites with one goal. Maybe meet a woman that understood me. But as the years of failure went by, my depression increased. I got to the point to where I was like "I give up on this goal." I got to focus on my mental health now.
After reading this, you might think that I'm on 7cups to try and meet a single woman, who understands me. That would be a nice thing if that happened. But that is not why I joined 7cups.
I joined 7Cups because I don't have anyone in my life, male or female, that truly understands my social and life problems. This is the only place I can go to talk about my issues, and try to feel better.
In the past several years, my main goal is to feel better. Thinking about all the things that I wish I could fix and don't have the people in my life to help me to fix them. Depresses me.
I could write a lot more about this, but I don't want to, and I don't want to make you as the reader read all of that. But I do have other posts here, that goes into more details on what I have been through in life. A lot of that stuff would help make this post make a little more sense. In one post I talk about how bad I was bullied growing up, and how that experience has created trauma that has messed me up emotionally as well.
@tryingtosurvive2024
Thank you so much for sharing your story so openly. It sounds like you’ve been carrying a lot of pain and frustration for many years, and I can really sense how isolating that must feel. The way you describe your struggles with relationships, your learning disability, and the challenges of trying to connect with others is really powerful—and heartbreaking. It makes so much sense that you’re feeling stuck and that the lack of meaningful relationships is weighing heavily on you. I can hear the hurt in your words, especially when you talk about being misunderstood, picked on, and facing rejection from people who don’t seem to see the real you.
Your decision to focus on your mental health is really important, and it sounds like it’s been a hard road getting there. It’s clear that you’ve faced so much. All of this, compounded by the fact that the relationships you’ve had with women haven’t been positive, adds layers of emotional pain.
How have you been feeling since joining 7Cups—do you feel like it’s helping you at all? And what are some ways you try to cope with the loneliness and frustration when it feels overwhelming? I’m really glad you’ve found a space where you can talk about these things, and you deserve to feel understood and supported. We’re here for you!
@Mel I don't want to speak too soon. I've been open on other websites too. 7Cups seems to be more supportive. I feel that there are some people here who wants the other members to get better. That is a big difference than what I've experience on other sites. Because I feel that everyone needs encouragement. There is power in encouragement.
