( tw: depression ?? ) i don’t even know at this point
hi my name is vin— i’m 19 years old, and i’m in a happy relationship or somewhat. i recently just had a summer job but that’s over. i also had a friend of 6 years but we ended things off as she went to college in another province/state.
these couple of days i’ve been off and on crying and i’m emotionally drained. i don’t know many people and i feel like i’m too much for my boyfriend— since me and my best friend fell apart and i found myself not wanting to feel alone. his comfort is the only thing that distracts me from my own mental issues, and he soothes the pain. i just feel like i’m dragging him away from his friends and family. am i in the wrong??? i don’t even know what to do. i keep crying for no reason and i’m just all over the place.
@persistentGlobe4206
You are not in the wrong for feeling.
Or for crying.
Or for being exhausted.
It's important your feelings are validated.
It's hard for One person to carry everything, it's important we are the own source of our happiness. Your part needs to be there for you, and together work through this 💕 💜
@persistentGlobe4206
Hi Vin! I am Jaz. 18, soon 19 🙃
I know that feeling of only having your boyfriend as your comfort. It sucks when you're not okay, but you don't want to tell him because what if you being sad ruins his day and so on.
Yep, that is how I feel. I lost an important friendship when she moved away, we became distant. Then when my boyfriend and I hit 1 year we had to do it on distance which was hard, and I didn't even have my best friend to talk to. I had another close friend who I confided in at the time, but it didn't hit the same as when I would talk to my best friend and it was a mistake because just a year later, she (close friend) would use my pain against me. ANYWAY, besides all this, family trauma has me on a chokehold and when my boyfriend and I fixed our relationship, going for 4 years in a few months, I was just too depressed and lonely and all the works. I was always telling him but I later felt like a burden more than a girlfriend and so I pulled back and kept to myself, BIG MISTAKE!! My depression got worse which affected my relationship, and which led to me lying to him until he found me self-harming. After that we had a talk about us and everything I kept from him.
Here's my advice:
Tell him the truth, how you feel when you always have to come to him, how you don't want to pressure him into making you his only priority but also tell him how you need him at times. Talking really goes a long way and those feelings of am I too much? or any of those negatives are only from you. And to stop them, you have to talk to him. Only he knows how he feels, and I am sure he loves you and wants to be there for you. Don't make the mistake I did of keeping things from my partner. You are not alone. You matter. Your feelings matter and so does his.
I am here for you too. I love listening to people and helping out where I can.
I hope this helps you (It is a little long though, but I hope you get my point).
Love,
Jaz 💖
While I was reading this I could’ve sworn that you and I have some sort of similarities. I feel that. I appreciate you taking your time to respond and share your experience. I’ve taken the time to talk to him— and he and I shared some emotional talk. He may not know what to do but he promises to be there for me when I need him, even if he may not know how to help; his company is surely enough. It’s nice to hear from you and I hope you know I’m also here for you. :) -Vin ⭐️
@persistentGlobe4206
I am happy to hear you guys talked it out. And that is step one in building your foundation even stronger, step 2 would be consistency and step 3 understanding.
And thank you, I will reach out 💕🫶
