New to the 7 Cups Community in January 2018? Say Hello here! And get to know others who joined in January too!

Hi All

Feeling helpless like a drowning man i have joined this forum...hope to find solace and get some advise to recoup

Good afternoon.

I just joined this website/app after a long and open discussion with my partner where he strongly feels I need professional help so I can sort out my deep rooted issues so he and I can have a better relationship and I can have a happier life.

I'm quite adverse to the idea of seeking out professional help in real life due to the connotations and if people found out. I want to try something like this first to see if it helps (basically stalling).

I guess I'll go into my problems then I've had it a bit rough my entire life. I mean what I've dealt with has been nothing compared to what others have had to deal with, so I apologize if it sounds like I'm being sad over nothing.

My parents divorced when I was young. My dad was verbally, physically, and emotionally abusive to my mum, he was an aggressive alcoholic, he had mental issues he wouldn't seek help for (OCD, schizophrenia), and he was just a shit person after they got married. He was also sexually abusive to my younger sister at times (like he would dry her after a shower/bath and spend longer time than necessary to dry her privates), and I guess you could say he was physically abusive to both of us as well (we would get the belt on our bare bums for speaking to each other at bed time, the next morning it would be bruised purple and red).

The divorce was quite messy (lasted a couple years) and I remember a lot of it due to being just a very aware and mature child. Due to this I have a real problem with adults drinking and/or being aggressive.

We had to move state to get support from family during the divorce, so we had to uproot our lives; mum had a great career and company car, close friends, and me and my sister had a great schooling life. When we moved to a different state all of that changed for the worst; both of us generally were shunned by most all the kids and only the weird kids (like I mean bad influence kids) would be friends with us. I particularly remember the transition being extremely difficult to deal with.

Since moving here I've never found making friends (or most any social interaction) easy, and I believe this is because of how poorly everyone in my schooling life here treated me even when I tried to do things their way.

I've also been overweight for the majority of my life. At my heaviest I was 100kg at 174cm tall. I believe being overweight made things worse for me in general (family relationships and trying to make friends). Since finishing high school I've dropped down to 75kg and am striving to meet my weight goal of being 69kg. From time to time I do binge eat, I've attempted to make myself throw up but I've never been successful.

During high school my relationship with my mum was pretty bad; we would argue, I would be a bratty ungrateful teenager and she would call me out on my weight and call me names. On my 16th birthday I didn't want to go to school so I stayed home and she was very unhappy with me, so unhappy that she told me she wish she never had me. I spent all day sitting in my wardrobe hiding, and when anyone came to see me I just sat there staring into nothingness because I felt so numb but also upset. That was the beginning of a coping mechanism I still use (rarely) to this day.

I've also had a lot of problems with my stepdad due to my stubbornness to his flaws; when we first met him he was in a pretty shit situation, surrounded by pretty shit people. He was and always has been a good man capable of more, and I guess that's what mum saw in him. Due to his own baggage, he had an alcohol and gambling problem which was very difficult for my family (my mum and my sister) and I to deal with due to our past with my dad. I held it against him up until recently (when I moved out) because of how often it happened and how it kept happening after he promised he would stop. He has stopped now and he is in a much better place.

So yeah, that pretty much sums up my life story. Needless to say I have some issues when it comes to dealing with people and my own emotions, as well as sprinkles of self harm (I cut a couple times in my teen years, now I bang my head against something or scratch myself in the same spot) and suicidal thoughts/desires (wanting to die, wishing the car I was in to crash and end it all, imagining stabbing a knife through my chest and seeing the blood) and it's becoming a problem for me in my adult life. I'm hoping I can sort this out on my own because I can identify the problems and I know what they are and why they are that way. But who knows.

Hey everyone joined here to meet people and try to improve my mood and help me my anxiety

Hey,

First post here. Ive been depressed since I was 13 ish? Which was fine until I realized how much it was affecting my family recently (Im 27 with a wife and 5 yr old). Ive been going to a doctor for a few months who throws pills at me but I dont have a comfort level where I can just talk about my feelings with another grown man face to face. So I came here and decided it may be easier to talk...

Hey guys. Im new here. [edited 1/19/18 - offsite contact information]

Hello everyone. I am new here. I struggle with depression and could use some support in working through it. This seems like a very nice place.

Hello everyone! I'm new here, just started 2 hours ago and I already like it. I'm 23 years old. I hope to find and gain new friends here. I suffer from anxiety and depression. I've had this for about 5 years and told only about seven people about it. I haven't even told my parents about it. I only hinted to my mom that I wanted to talk to a professional because of "school stress". I can't bear to tell her that I suffer from anxiety and depression. Both my parents are doctors, but I knew they wouldn't get it, and I was right. She just shrugged it off and never mentioned it again. I hope that this community will help me manage my thoughts and emotions. Looking forward for my growth with 7 Cups.

Hello everyone, I'm 23 and I just joined a couple of hours ago. I've struggled with depression and self harm for a good seven years. I'm a survivor but recent events have caused me to relaspe which is why I came here to seek help with dealing with this awful relationship that I had that has severely impacted me and has left me feeling pretty down and useless lately. I have already enjoyed my time on here and I look forward to meeting new people and I hope to better manage my emotions.

Hello everyone! I'm new here and excited to start feeling better about myself/life. Lately I've felt very alone and like I don't have anyone to go to when I need to get things off of my chest. At 26 I never thought this would be where i was at this point in my life. I feel like I'm stuck in a rut and can't claw my way out.

New to 7 cups. Looking for support and to truly use my voice. Looking forward to what this community can do