Managing Postpartum Depression Through Self-Compassion
Postpartum depression is a challenging condition that can impact the mental health and wellbeing of new mothers. It's important to know that you're not alone, and there are evidence-based strategies that can help you cope with this condition.
One promising strategy is recognized as Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT). ACT is a therapy founded on mindfulness that concentrates on embracing challenging emotions and thoughts while simultaneously making strides towards achieving one's values and aspirations. This could be especially relevant for postpartum depression since sentiments of gloominess, angst, and despair can be daunting to navigate.
A means of implementing ACT is via self-compassion. Self-compassion entails treating oneself with kindness, comprehension, and acceptance, even in the face of distressing emotions. This could be particularly significant for freshly initiated mothers who might sense a pressure to have everything under control or compare themselves to others.
An exercise that one may attempt is practicing self-compassion. Discover a peaceful spot where you can meditate without disruption and take some deep breaths. Ponder over a kind and encouraging phrase that you can tell yourself, such as "May I be compassionate to myself" or "May I be patient with myself." Repeat this affirmation to yourself, allowing yourself to feel the compassion of your words.
Some questions to reflect on after the exercise are:
✨ What did you notice during the exercise? Did you find it challenging or easy to be kind to yourself?
✨ How might practicing self-compassion impact your relationship with yourself and others?
✨ Are there any values or goals that you can focus on during this challenging time?
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I know of 2 new mothers who had postpartum depression a few years ago. One mother, luckily had a very supporting husband, his care and love helped her through it. She also was recovering from a bad car accident before she had her son. It was a very long recovery. Currently, she has been practicing a lot of self-compassion. Spending quality time with her son, and making time for herself too.
The other new mother, she suffers from depression herself already, since high school, so having postpartum was more difficult for her. Kept her on edge, especially when her son has the same condition as her dad, where they do not feel pain. So, she has to keep a close eye on him when they are at home. Any small bump on the head or fall, she has to take him to the Emergency. He doesn't even cry much because of the lack of feeling the pain. So, this has made my friend even more stressed than she already is. Her husband, was relocated with his job, so they moved away, otherwise, I could've met up with her more often. Now, they are a ferry ride away. She does come back during big holidays, as her parents are here. But her parents go to her place every weekend to take care of their grandson.
We do talk on the phone, just to be there for her and reassuring her that things will be okay.
I find because I have depression too, I really do understand the feelings she goes through and share my experiences with her so she can feel more at ease, and know it's normal for her to feel certain things.
I ran into 7 Cups because I had a postpartum depression that I wasn't even aware of. I just remember having a pure love for my baby while holding her and at the same time, I had a void feeling. I went online looking for help and that's when I met a wonderful listener here who helped me through.
This was in 2019. Late last year, I came back to thank her again, but she's no longer here. She helped me through a tough time, and I will never forget her. Now, I listen here to pay it forward.
Thank you for putting lights on this matter. Postpartum depression is real, it happens to the "toughest" women, and it's important to reach out and reach in.
