Why can't I learn to open up to people?
Anonymous
on
Nov 10, 2015
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I have a massive fear of rejection. I think it started at a very young age, since I experienced having to let go of my best friends and my favorite places due to all the moving my family went through. Not opening up to people naturally became a way to protect myself from getting hurt.
As I grew older, I also started to figure out that people like to be around happy and funny people, but once you become serious and not so entertaining, the majority of people didn't care about me anymore. In addition to that, I was almost sexually abused by people I never dreamed of doing such stuff to me that I completely lost trust in people.
I didn't understand how and why other people could live so nonchalantly in a world where people just hurt each other. I doubted their mentality, and eventually started questioning myself. Maybe I was too naive. Maybe I had to ignore all the darkness and confusion inside me and just accept the fact that I had to live lying to myself each and everyday that I was okay. I got stuck in a loop of my own thoughts without being able to find the right people that I could trust. Every thoughts and emotions had to circulate within me and conclude itself in a cage of my head. This process became so normal for me to the people opening up to other people became a huge taboo.
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HawaiianAir
on
Jan 26, 2016
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Learning how to open up to people is a tricky one. This only comes with practice. I've been there myself - I think I was overly insecure, and just didn't trust people. I always thought that my opinion didn't matter or perhaps that my opinion was even stupid. Building confidence in yourself is important before opening up to people, I think.
Anonymous
on
Mar 8, 2016
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Opening up to someone is a hard thing to do. It's always a good idea to start small. Tell a family member about your day and how certain things made you feel. This way you start to get comfortable with talking about small things and learn to open up about things that worry you
TARY
on
Nov 9, 2015
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Have you tried opening up to yourself first? If you can accept what you see and who you are, it will be easier for you to open up to other people. I know it feels like the world is constantly judging, but this is not always true - you are special the way you are and you got to give others a chance to know you. This is a step by step process, slowly but surely you'll get there.
Anonymous
on
Jul 14, 2015
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Opening up to people is really tough, because when we open up to people we are vulnerable to them. Part of the reason why you can't open up to people might be a fear of being vulnerable. Is there something that has happened in your past that has made you mistrusting of others? Were you once rejected by someone for opening up to them? Try to identify where you are stuck, and it might help you open up.
Greatlistener87
on
May 10, 2016
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Might be that you have had a bad experience with opening up to people in the past that has caused you to protect yourself. The idea is to realize that you are only human and so are the people who hurt you. Forgive and move on.
VanessaD92
on
May 23, 2015
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I believe it comes from fear of being vulnerable, no one wants to show weaknesses to others or allow others to see parts of them they are not the 'best' version of themselves.
butterfly182
on
Apr 7, 2015
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It could have something to do with the fact that you maybe have trust issues, or either that you do want to burden people with your problems, or either that you are a very shy person.
truelove92
on
Jul 5, 2016
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I fail to open up to people as I am afraid as to what thoughts they might be having about me once I reveal the real me.
Brittneym101
on
Jul 19, 2015
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It could be a number of reasons as to why you feel like you can't learn to open up to people. Sometimes you can have issues opening up to people when you have problems trusting other people, you're not comfortable with yourself, you've been hurt before and you feel like nobody is listening to you. For me those would be the reasons why I would have a hard time opening up to others.
Anonymous
on
Jan 25, 2016
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Maybe because you feel like you'd be judged easily and quickly. Insecurities prevent you from that.
Anonymous
on
Jan 4, 2016
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Opening up to people isn't something you learn, it is something that you have to practice. If you have a person that you deem trustworthy, maybe tell them something about yourself that you don't usually tell people. Maybe your favorite ice cream is chocolate chip, or you don't really like the frosting on cake. It starts with minor steps like this, and then as the person gains your trust more and more, you can tell them more things. But like anything, practice makes perfect
aileenemc
on
May 8, 2015
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Opening up to people is a very difficult thing to do. In order to let that happen, you must first recognize why you are afraid of letting people in. Try writing down what you are feeling, every single emotion and detail. Give it to one of your closest friends or even to an adult. You are opening up to someone, through writing. That will help you become more confident and soon, you will even be able to talk about it in person. Everything takes step by step.
Oblivion5
on
Jan 26, 2015
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You have probably been hurt before and just don't want it to happen again so you do as much as you can to prevent yourself from more hurt and damage.But you need to understand that everything gonna be alright
bestTruth96
on
Jan 27, 2015
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Sometimes it is hard to trust people, especially if you have been hurt int he past by others that you have trusted.
ta2293
on
May 24, 2015
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Sometimes we become convinced that people aren't interested in what we have to say or that we will be judged. This prevents me specifically from feeling like I can tell people how I really feel or what is happening in my life.
Anonymous
on
Jun 6, 2016
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You may have been raised to keep quiet and werent alowd to give a response. You have to just take baby steps and say one thing a day
Anonymous
on
May 22, 2015
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To a point, we all have a "wall" that we put up as a defense mechanism. Some put it up more often than others and then there are those who put it up and keep it up. If you surround yourself with people that you truly do trust, you can begin to let that wall down and open up to others little by little.
SenpaiXD
on
Apr 20, 2015
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Because opening up to people shows to them that you are weak. And you are vulnerable and exposed by that person. To trust is to offer the possibility of being hurt.
Adam2342
on
Oct 14, 2016
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You can't open up to people if you didn't open up to yourself. Accept that not everyone will reject you , the intentions that you have for others is the same intentions you will get , Keep up giving good energy and you will get it back.