How can I stop making assumptions?
BeInJoy
on
Feb 8, 2016
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I love this question. Assumptions arise from the ego - that part in us that tries so very hard to protect us from ourselves and the outside world. We assume things in an attempt to outsmart a situation or person to keep us from getting hurt.
The thing about assumptions is this: the world is only happening through a series of PERCEPTIONS. We never see the world as it truly is, we can only see it through the lens of our own eyes/hearts/minds.
The next time you find yourself making an assumption, try to remind yourself that you are seeing the world through your own perception. Try to take yourself out of the situation and see it objectively. See it as if you are watching a play. This takes out the emotion, it takes out the thoughts that come with it, and lets you see what is happening through your perception without being tied to it.
Struggling with depression?
Juncat
on
Jun 30, 2015
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When it comes down to it, assumptions are caused by a lack of communication. It can be difficult to gather the courage to ask questions but if you practice at it, you'll surely notice it becomes easier. The best thing you can do is practice talking with people and asking them questions. If you can't do that, try your best to let go of whatever assumptions you've developed. Just acknowledge them, then understand that you can't possibly know for sure, and forget about it. Don't let it trouble you until it comes up again, and then do your best to politely ask questions or think critically about why exactly you developed a particular assumption in the first place. I highly suggest reading The Four Agreements by don Miguel Ruiz http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/6596.The_Four_Agreements
patientLily30
on
Apr 5, 2015
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Be in the moment. Listen to what the person is saying. Look around at what is happening. Describe what it is that you are hearing and seeing. If you take things as they are you will learn over time to stop assuming because you are living in the present.
bluelotus99
on
Apr 11, 2016
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fear of losing control leads you to this situation. lean back and learn to observe the life flow around you like watching a stream in an aquarium window underneath a river. sometimes we need to stop and look around in life to understand the larger picture.
EnigmaticRebel
on
Aug 18, 2015
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I stopped by learning to think before speaking. Often my rush to talk got the best of me or my own personal insecurities took over when all I ever needed to do was think.
Mamabear83
on
May 2, 2016
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My best tip is to be mindful of your own thoughts. "Catch" yourself, and recognize when you might be jumping to conclusions about something. Instead of voicing that assumption you might instead ask the person what they're thinking about the situation at hand. "How are you dealing with this? Are you feeling stressed, or maybe sad? What do you feel like is happening here?" These are all wonderful open ended questions that can get the person talking from their point of view, which might open up a side of things you hadn't thought of before!
HopeBehindtheVeil23
on
Aug 15, 2016
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By understanding that making assumptions is normal and part of our brains tendency to fill out incomplete information. However, we also need to exercise a choice not to believe everything that is assumed immidately. Over time, the assumptions reduce. It's all about the story we want to believe when we don't have enough info.
nrigaud
on
Apr 22, 2015
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Try putting yourselves in their shoes. Understand what they're going through and look at it from every angle, there's almost certainly a reason why they're doing it.
CrayHearts
on
Aug 4, 2015
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I can stop making assumptions by remembering that each person is different and they all handle things differently.
tjb28
on
Dec 1, 2015
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Try to ask yourself "Am i jumping to conclusions,Realize that not everyone thinks the same as you do because we are all individuals
miraculousDaisy75
on
Dec 8, 2015
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Try to imagine what that person is going through. Other people might have the same problems as you and you have to be aware of that.
Greysmdl
on
Oct 25, 2016
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Everyone is at a different point in their life. Emotional stability is not line it is more of a bar graph. Some days you will be better than others, that is just life. Very few things in life will be game changers. It is important to ask yourself if it will matter a year from now. Most people do not set out to make you feel bad. Many people are simply just focused on their own problems, and don't stop to think about others.
Danielle999
on
Oct 9, 2017
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When it comes down to it, assumptions are caused by a lack of communication. It can be difficult to gather the courage to ask questions but if you practice at it, you'll surely notice it becomes easier. The best thing you can do is practice talking with people and asking them questions. If you can't do that, try your best to let go of whatever assumptions you've developed. Just acknowledge them, then understand that you can't possibly know for sure, and forget about it. Don't let it trouble you until it comes up again, and then do your best to politely ask questions or think critically about why exactly you developed a particular assumption in the first place
Weed
on
Mar 2, 2015
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well in my opinion you can change the word assumption to guess and opinion, that way you won't be assuming but will be guessing. But if you wanna do that too, I believe controlling your thoughts by like using meditation.
smvthy
on
May 14, 2015
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You need to understand that you don't know what persons story. You cannot judge till you know. There is always a reason someone is who they are.
Anonymous
on
May 20, 2015
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by looking at facts and looking objectively at situations and observe a lot whats happening around you. not assume something, also you can ask, and check
GoodPoint
on
Jun 30, 2015
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Stick to what is happening in the moment. Don't try to predict anything and be clear about the facts.
gigantIceCream37
on
Aug 18, 2015
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stop thinking that there is reason/s behind everything "don't over psychologising" in our terms of words
uniquecreature41
on
Dec 28, 2015
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Once you realise that you can never really know what people are thinking or why they have chosen to behave in a certain way, you can assure yourself that social pressures, judgment, embarrassment and shyness all play a part in how a person behaves. If you percieve someone's behaviour in a certain way, bear in mind that sometimes it is hard to tell why somebody behaved in a certain way or took a certain course of action. Maybe your own judgment is colouring your idea of why someone did a particular thing.
DeeHeartToHeartTalk
on
Jun 20, 2016
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By being in the here and now. Challenging ourselves with questions, asking ourselves for evidences, doing self-reflection really helps.