WingedTheCat717 Member Profile

I Can't REALLY feel anything.

Depression Support / by WingedTheCat717

December 8th, 2017

...See more As per usual, i'm a little mentally jumbled, so sorry if i don't make much sense ^^; It began in 2014. I think i felt like...like, i had issues, but they were all psycological, not very up-front, so i felt like i wasn't pityable? and i wanted attention, i wanted help, i wanted someone to care. so i began to self-pity... a lot. a l o t. eventually, around early-mid 2015 my heart began to become..painful. i'M TALKING ABOUT EMOTIONALLY/SPIRITUALLY, DON'T WORRY, PHYSICALLY I'VE ALWAYS BEEN MORE OR LESS FINE XD but basically it was just...progressively becoming..sad. and then by late 2015 it was a black hole, so. in 2016 i slowly made it back to just having a numb heart, but...still. when i was a kid, when something made me feel GENERALLY good in any way, i could feel it in my heart. happiness with it. when something made me feel generally bad in any way, i'd feel it. it hurt. but now, i feel nothing. no matter what. and it kinda freaking sucks, because like..let's say you had something closed off, that you'd need something to release the pressure inside it when it was working or else it'd leak or worse. and that was my heart. and, in this..metaphor, it's blocked off, closed up, and so when i feel anything, i express it more physically, and i can never fully feel it, in this metaphor, it just...slightly leaks out. i.. i don't really know if this is making sense? basically i can't feel emotions in the healthy way i used to. what happened to make my heart so numb, practically as if it didn't even exist at this point? like i said, extreme self-pity, but also, EXTREME self-abuse. mentally, emotionally, psycologically, so forth... really, just... every time i am happy, i am never REALLY happy. imagine if you lived in a very, very run-down old house, not super super messy but always extremely cold, only just warm enough you can live in it, but otherwise freezing for you. nothing is fully functional, but more or less works enough for you to use it. you cannot move out no matter what. it will take a lot to fix. and you cannot deny it is awful. but, just because of how exhausting it is this is what it is CONSTANTLY like, and you cannot cope, sometimes you try to run to the blocked-up windows. trying to open them at all, let ANY light in, maybe pop some confetti, put some brightly-colored decorations up, and you try to make it all you can see. but, ultimately, you can't deny. you can feel it all around you. how freezing it is. how poor quality the house is, maybe you forced your body to warm up to deny the cold, maybe you put on bright clothes to deny how dull and crummy and run-down the place is. who knows how long you will remain entranced by the tiniest lightbeam still dulled by thick curtains, by the bright streamers and all still covered in dust, by the badly-drawn colorful drawings you made to distract yourself, the fact of the matter is all around you. the streamers will fall, perhaps rain will leak and break them, the windows are still boarded up and blocked heavily, you can't try and force any light in forever, and the drawings can't please you for long. you will come back to the harsh reality of the matter, no matter how long you deny it or distract yourself. ...whew, that was long, but god i love when i can describe my situations with things so accurately and artistically like that ♥♥♥ i hope it makes sense xD i can't afford therapy. i'm sure in some ways i could get a few sessions through, but eeegh... the struggle.. i will admit i have a biiig, big issue with reaching out for help. i literally never say a goddamn word to ANYONE, ever, unless it's a passive "tfw when ___" comment with my friends who only say "relatable" or "same" and nothing is actually done about it. because everyone i know is dealing with their own stuff and i refuse to add to the burden. the one friend i ever say anything to goes to college and is clearly busy, when i tell them of my issues i'm kinda...intimidated because i can TELL if i persist with it they'll get annoyed and likely lash out minorly (yeehaw inventing words). my other friend is suicidal half the time and all his friends know how good he is with support so he's often busy on that regard too. so... it sucks too cause i really wish i had support, i really wish i had someone to talk to...but flat-out fear of being an inconvenience, i never say a legitimate word. and i..tend to have a lot of guilt/fear associated with places like this for some reason?... so i'm really not active here xD;; ..egh..really, i have very prominant issues but don't know what to do about them. i hope this made sense, thank you dearly for reading, and keep on keeping on ♥

a lot of bad stuff, i need help

Depression Support / by WingedTheCat717

October 11th, 2017

...See more TW: SELF-HARM, depression, borderline suicidal things, a small bit of eating disorder type things, relationship issues so, uh...i'm writing this because yet again, i want to vent my feelings, but i really don't want to do so where it'll go unheard, because i..i think i want help. i don't want things to be just like this, always i..don't really know where to begin. a while ago, i took a screening for depression, which ranked severe. i mean, yes i think about self-harm daily, i spend about 15 minutes AT THE LEAST getting out of bed, i CANNOT truly feel good, i always feel bad deep down, my self-esteem is crud, so on and so forth...but i still get out of bed. i still manage to eat. i still do things. yeah yeah yeah, i'm on my computer all day, but i'm on my computer all day drawing and/or talking to my friends. (my offline friends i'm only able to see once a week) i have so many...is sectors the right word?? idk lol i'm kinda scatterbrained rn. because i'm always scatterbrained, but at least i manage to get my point across :P sectors maybe (lol) to this depression...but i'll start with something important. i don't want to allow myself to get better. i hate that i HAVE to take care of myself, when i see things like Recovering Your Life For Good(tm)! i just hate it...i gained a very complex fear in 2015, that i think is of improvement? i thiiink the issue is when i think of getting better, healing issues, the big, big issue is i cannot see anything positively. so things like healing, fixing mental issues, etc etc, when i think of it i cannot imagine such positivity. i only imagine becoming so, so profoundly numb you are not able to feel the negativity anymore. it feels like death. i have many, many unserious thoughts. yes i think "i hate having to allow myself to breathe" daily, but if i actually hold my breath for longer than a few seconds, i don't enjoy it! (unless i'm swimming. but i don't really swim anymore, so) and, sometimes, i say these unserious thoughts. it's hard to tell what's serious and what i mean vs what isn't, but if it seems suicidal, it's probably not completely serious. i'm not suicidal. i really, really do not want to die. i just hate having to take care of myself, tolerate myself, all this. i'm a walking contradiction..i hate myself, yet losing myself is probably one of my greatest fears. i hate having to take care of myself, but i don't want to die or actually start to physically fade away, i really don't. the thought of 'getting better' scares me yet i can't stand to live like this anymore. it's just...so, so many things... i...i'm sorry this seems so jumbled, but i don't reach out to my friends for support, i do not make a peep, so i have a loooot to say about this, i could go on and on and on about this, the only thing that does so is how badly i don't want to be a burden to my friends, but i know here there are some people who manage to read it all, who could listen and listen and listen and...somehow, magically, aren't tired of it, aren't tired of you, who, by some means, can actually tolerate you despite all this, that don't hate you despite all it. it's quite relieving, honestly. and, speaking of not reaching out to my friends...i don't do it because you have no idea the depth of how much i don't want to be a burden. i have so much of my own issues when a friend tells me of theirs i get super, super anxious, my appetite plummets, and everything just makes me feel so bad i CAN'T give support. so, logically, in my head, i think i am a burden. i have so, so, so many issues, who could tolerate hearing them all? when people suggest seriously getting help, i think oh god no, because it's honestly such a pain. getting therapy requires so, so many steps and such, i feel like nothing more than a burden to everyone by doing such. i blame this on when i was a kid, i WAS a burden. i was the defintion of embarrassment, i was a pain to be around, i was unlovable, i was only good for maybe a few laughs and to get people things, because you know how eager i am to please. my mom, for some reason, always would give more attention to me? so if let's say, i wanted something, my mom would make sure i got it, and my siblings were always SUPER salty about this? all "what did they do to deserve that? I *insert reason why they deserved it more*, *insert reason why i suck so i DON'T deserve it*, *blah blah they're better than me and i am not worthy*", they did this with almost EVERYTHING. so, a while ago, when i wanted ice cream, i told my dad 'i want to eat ice cream, but i didn't do anything to DESERVE that ice cream', he told me i was a lovely person or something and that that was not how it works, as an example of how the abuse STILL affects me. an actually quite sad thing about all this too, is i am kinda dating someone. we're definetely not a full-on, commited relationship, but we're not just friends either. why is this sad? they make me feel worse. yes, i love them, and they love me, and they do certainly make me happy! and i do kinda like being with them.. but on the other hand, i really wish i wasn't with them. the issue was, one day, i was thinking about the two people i'd want to be more than friends with; her, the person i'm already kinda dating, and one of my first friends who, although i can't really talk to now, i LOVE to bits and pieces platonically, but also have a l o t of romantic feelings towards them. that person. to me, they're an angel, they make me so happy, i'd be fine having them around me no matter what (unless i needed alone time to recharge, nobody'd be allowed during those times), (whew just darkened the text, much easier to read now X3) generally they just...i'd be so, so much happier being with them than who i am now. and, ever since i realized that...i secretly really wish i wasn't with them. the person i WANT to be with i have ROMANTIC feelings towards, just romantic. the person i'm kinda dating... i'm attracted to them like...i just find them attractive. like, personality-wise, they're the most attractive person i've ever known. so that, mixed with knowing them and kinda being with them for months, i've naturally developed like.. the stuff aside from 'w0w ur h0t' (i'm perpetually humorous, forgive me x'D), being more supportive and loving and all.. just...the bad thing is, i can actually pick out psychologically bad things they've done to me. like, i'm more insecure about liking naturey things and just inherently being more naturey as a person, due to them... honestly feels like them borderline guilt-tripping me, as i live in a decently naturey place and the only nature there is a few palm trees and the ocean. i just generally feel more ashamed of liking the things i like, despite them not being bad. the issue is i'm overly sensitive, and psycologically i WILL NOT forget if you say anything that offends me, so it's hard to draw the line between just me being offended by everything and legitimately bad, abusive things. i don't know who's in the wrong here, i don't know..what to do. i never really take advice. partially because of aforementioned fear of 'improvement', partially because i don't feel worthy enough to try and help myself, partially because i don't want to put in the effort. i CAN'T take therapy, my family doesn't have the money, and besides if i did they would know, and i do not want a single member of my family to know a single thing of my personal life. *quickly sketches something to vent my feelings bc it was a good idea and i wanted to let it out* and to add to all of this, i could have an eating disorder. i hate the fact i have to eat. i have so much stigma with it, so much guilt, so so much 'this not that' that i'd rather just avoid the pain of eating altogether. i hate being hungry, but i'm never hungry anyway, so... i don't give a crud how i look or anything, i just have no appetite and very low motivation to eat, i don't like it, i don't like the fact i have to do it, it feels like a chore. and i'm nearly 20 lbs underweight, too, so that doesn't help... this all gets very, very bad when.. i have this thing. i feel like, only if i hurt myself bad enough i had to go to a hospital or something, only THEN would i not be taken for granted, only then would i be seen, cared for, only then would i get any good attention...and this is mainly at my family. i feel like if i'd nearly killed myself, only then would things start to be ok, only then will my offline life i live....really start to have a lot of value. because otherwise, i am not cared for, i am not loved, i mean nothing, or so it feels. but it becomes scary, i know that going to a hospital would not be fun, i have literally never stepped foot inside of a hospital, you can apparently get sick simply from going inside one, and, worst of all, the self-harm nessesary could be fatal... i have a horrible pain tolerance, i get scared as crap if i hurt myself even somewhat badly, just...i know, i know that going to the hospital and all, that extent, that's not at all what i SERIOUSLY, seriously want.. just.. in my head, it seems like it'd be a relief. people would check up on me to see how i'm doing, they'd stop taking me for granted, it just...feels like then, people would be more careful, i'd be more loved, more appriciated... just.. it feels like only then, things would be good, and that's really, really bad, isn't it? i don't know if this is too extreme for here...but, again, i don't know where to go. i don't have a phone so i can't call any hotlines (and besides, due to living with 10 other people that i hate, i don't want to say anything out loud..), i can't take therapy, just...something i could do in secret. something that helps, that's good, that's worth it... that helps me feel something..i don't want this to stay in silence, i don't want this to remain completely unknown, i don't wanna leave myself in the dark here...i want help. i want things to start to be more ok, to help me legitimately, seriously start to feel good, not 'forcing-myself-to-feel-good-because-i-feel-nothing-other-than-depression-and-i'm-in-denial-i-really-feel-this-bad', GOOD good. that i'm legitimately okay, that when i'm alone, that when i go to bed at night, i'm legitimately content. just...yeah. i've pretty much said it all. by now i want to draw, maybe eat...not remain unheard xD iii really hope i'm not gonna get into trouble for this, if you read this all you are hardcore, heck yeah my man have a cookie that suits your dietary needs and a high five, thank you very much. keep on keeping on, and give yourself a hug for me, will ya? i really hope i don't get in trouble for this hhhhh

mental self-abuse/desparation (TW)

Journals & Diaries / by WingedTheCat717

June 30th, 2017

...See more TW: abuse, self-abuse, i...don't even know...delusions????? sexual self-abuse sorry i make so many posts... but i just now got out of a bout of this and it...i need help, but i don't know what to do. recently there's been something fucked up...i guess i need to give some backstory, context... so in early 2015, i was relying on one of my friends for ALL my support. if i had any issue at all, i'd rant to them about it, but they also felt horrible, depressed, suicidal...one day they just lashed out at me, and i got trust issues...i guess that's also why i feel like such a burden and turn away from others because of it, haha. so that, mixed with my self-pity, i isolated myself. i got real lonely. so i made up...like an imaginary friend, but a girlfriend, in an attempt to feel less lonely. keep in mind, i wasn't talking to ANY of my friends, i avoided my family, it was just myself and that...'imaginary girlfriend'. i got obsessed. i was on the road to the worst time of my life, at that time, i was not talking to ANYONE. i was abusing myself on several levels, another 'imaginary ....SOMETHING had spawned, and it was extremely sexually abusive...i don't know why i'd do that to myself... the reason i created that 'imaginary girlfriend' was due to desparation, craving to be loved...which is bullshit, cause even though i didn't talk to anyone and nobody really talked to me i was still loved... and almost 2 years later, i still deal with hints of that...about a week ago (idk, i have no concept of time lol) i'd imagined that...*erases a bunch of text* imagined myself being abused in a way that's..that's fucked with me. there's this disturbance in energy due to that slight trauma, if you will. i just...i keep imagining that i'm being abused as an attempt to feel loved...it's weird because i have several friends, one i talk to every day, she often tells me she loves me, but i might as well be dead alone i feel so unloved...the thing with the abuse i imagine is the abuser is always sexually abusive, too. and just...lots of fucked up things. almost every time i imagine it, too, my mind goes into this...gah, idk, but i imagine me with whatever kind of mother my mind creates (never ever a good mother, neglectful and abusive) and...i keep hurting myself in these, desprate for that mother to love me, she never really does... meh, i'm demotivated rn and just want to talk to my friend, but i'll still post this...this is an issue that's affected me for years now, more or less, i will NOT just leave it in the dust, a secret, for nobody to know...i need help with it. i will not hide it away from that help. i am also very hungry so i will go get some beans which make me so full i feel like vomiting, bahaha. keep on keeping on man...me, at this time, i'm like the embodiment of..gah, what's the word? i think it began with a d...keeping on, persisting, despite there being lots of bad stuff. like it very well could just leave you stuck there, but you persist, you keep on, you do what you need to do and you continue...i oughta be grateful for that. i oughta be grateful for myself in general, haha! don't take yourself for granted...

okay, i feel like crud. (TW)

General Support / by WingedTheCat717

June 4th, 2017

...See more (TRIGGER WARNING: self-harm, mental illness-type stuff?) so not only is my mental health bad, my physical is bad too, which just makes my mental heath even worse. just a stuffy/runny nose. no big deal, right? well when it's a stuffy/runny nose mixed with sore throat at times, gender issues, conflicting thoughts always being against you, having your period coming which fucks with you emotionally, hard time sleeping due to those conflicting thoughts, etc etc... i was raised badly. i don't know how to handle my emotions, feeling anything negative, i mentally resort to violence. i'm not gonna seriously beat anyone up or anything like that, but it frustrates me. my thoughts seem to always be like...i'll be thinkng about whatever, and there's some opposing thought asking like 'aren't you supposed to be doing that?' just always like...imagine the most skeptical person ever. questioning everything you do in a way that makes you feel like it's wrong, like you shouldn't be doing that, even if what you're doing is justified, harmless, etc. THAT voice is always, always, always in my mind. sometimes i'm like falling asleep with a nice calming song in my mind and when i hear that voice i just go 'go fuck yourself, i'm gonna do what i want, and right now i'm gonna relax', but that's rare. long story short, i have a lot of issues right now. everything is kinda just...dormant, usually, imagine a muddy sea floor or whatever, there's a bunch of crap there, and it's just sitting there, but when a fish or whatever comes along and...what's the word...it's not dormant anymore, it's all shaken up and everywhere? like that. all my issues are here. some are passively bothering me (*cough cough* MY THOUGHTS *cough cough*), but a lot of the time i'm not focusing on it. but when something comes along, shakes it all up, everything seems so big, so irritating, it upsets me, and i don't know what to do to handle it, i don't really FULLY feel...like, anything, because my heart is practically just fucking nonexistant, it's so numb, and if it wasn't, i'd feel my emotions completely...like in my heart. but it's practically like nothing's there, so what gives?... my thoughts are getting worse, it's all getting worse. my urges to self-harm have gotten more violent, although i haven't self-harmed in a while (surprisingly didn't self-harm before my period, happens every time), sometimes i want cuts instead of what i usually do. which is bad. i don't want to seriously hurt myself, which very well could happen with cutting and the like. do you ever just feel like...having to care for yourself is a burden? you feel all this emotional crud and it's heavy on you, but remember to drink lots of water, eat healthy food, take a shower every day, make your bed every day, wash your sheets every week, clean your cat's litter box every fucking day, exercise a lot even though you feel like rotting in your bed until you pass out so the pain isn't really there anymore, do this, do that, do this, do that...it's fucking impossible. i mean, i drink water pretty OK, haven't drank much today because you know that feeling when you don't wanna drink water due to a sore throat, swallowing hurts and stuff...i always have a cup of water (with a lid so it doesnt spill) by me. and i don't take a shower every day just because that kills good bacteria (i shower every...2-3 days??? i hate measuring time like that, when does one day end and the oter begin? does the first day count?), eating healthy food for me is kinda like...just happens regardless because i like 'healthy food' and have this..spite????? towards junk food (cept ice cream, ice cream gets past my radar.)...but like... sometimes it feels like all the shit you have to do to sustain yourself physically feels like a total burden. because you're never 100% healthy, your body feels heavy to walk around with (even though i'm not really heavy for my height, i guess..), you just wish you could eat things you like, have your cat there, draw maybe (and not drown in perfectionism over it), talk to your friends... you just want it all to be okay. but your mind isn't healthy enough for that. even when you're talking to friends you'll get a random rush of sadness and you ignore it to not be a pain, because it is a pain for you too, because it's always there. you're always sad deep down, you never REALLY feel good, your mind hates you, your body isn't healthy enough to walk around and excerise but laying in a bed is bad too (your blood flow is like... bad. i've felt it before, it's not fun), and just..everything is a burden. you have good stuff left, but all the bad stuff is so, so up-front, you CANNOT ignore it, you just want it to all be ok, to all be ok, you'll heal and by after that you can handle this stuff. but you're broken, you aren't healed, and life throws crap at you anyway. it's a burden. there are things not as heavy and clear, just...numbed pain, because it's not so horrible and it's partially numbed you don't reach the bottom of this emotionally so you don't learn some big lesson from it like usual. yes you can trek on but you're still unhealed, get something with cracks in it, keep using it and it'll break. sorry for talking so much and sorry for the bit of spirituality (heart stuff), i just have a lot of issues and ranting is good... letting it out is good...plus i think watching the emotions go from 'something on mind' to full-on rant rambly-ness, to that...chill-ness. relaxing after it, the healing..i think just watching that is interesting. i've posted things exactly like that on other places and yeah, it's nice, but i'm worried that the readers (often friends) see it end on a positive note and in denial that i'm in this pain, that that's that (2manythat), i'm not gonna feel that way again, i did the rant and i got better, but i always sink back, i absolutely am not trying to at all, but it just happens... just because i healed once doesn't mean i'm permanantly fixed, i still have a lot of persistant issues, i still need help... i just..have so many issues. half of the source of all this is due to my family, the other half due to years of mental, emotional, sexual etc self-abuse...i self-harm, i get dysphoria which is inevitable being trans and all, i have that damned perpetually conflicted voice in my head, i tend to get irritated at my family and that results in self-harm, i have a distrust towards people which has been making me really want to isolate myself more which is the last thing i need right now, i'm afraid of straight people and men which is a burden, i'll imagine abusive situations in an attempt to feel loved, i have several friends but still feel unreasonably unloved uncared for and alone, i don't live in a remotely supportive enviroment when it comes to emotional and mental stuff, i'm bad at sleeping which just adds to the burden, etc, etc, et fucking c.... i have things that make me happy. i've been thinking about getting a binder + packer (trans stuff to help dysphoria) which would make me happy to have those, because my body isn't really...right, what i imagine it as, it's not comfortable in that regard, my cat is still here and she cuddles me, sleeps up against me every time i do and her presense overall is nice to have, i can listen to passion pit which helps me cope so much, i talk to a friend pretty much every day which i like a lot, i know things that make me happy....but all my issues aren't going away by themselves. i don't know what to do. i don't really want a typical irl therapist, i don't want my family to know about all my issues, and i've heard with some therapists it's just they get you SO deep in your issues and then go 'oh, your time is up', i sure as hell wouldn't trust JUST me to try and fix all this, to make it all better...i don't know what to do. i have this weird-ass complicated fear of.. progress??? like i'll see things about recovery of self-harm and be like 'nyeeeeeghh i don't want to' just something about this idea of throwing it all away....but then i see things like 'studies suggest self-harm may actually benefit mental health or whatever' and i'm just like nOPERRINO AND CHEESE THAT'S TOXIC AF GOOOO AWAY THANKS. like i'm afraid of this whole dedication and commitment to getting better but at the same time wouldn't dare do NOTHING to try and help my issues. ...meh. i figure this'll be useful. i might enjoy reading it in the future. but right now, i'm hungry as crap, so i'll go focus on that. if you read all this you're hardcore. have a brownie or cookie or sushi or whatever you like. i am not suicidal. sometimes i have sortof suicidal self-injury thoughts but i try to push them away as to not indulge in this horrible idea that suicide would make it better, it won't. i forgot to mention that like...BECAUSE of my sickness i can't not focus on it, so even if i laid down with a song i like, mentally being kind to myself, that badness is still there. so i'm probably just gonna feel worse and cry...which would make me feel slightly better.... but not really cause i'm sick and it sucks. i'm sad and gay and sick and also on my period but most importantly right now right now i am very very hungry so i will go do The Eating™. bai

New here, hello!

Newbie Hub / by WingedTheCat717

May 26th, 2017

...See more Ahoy! I'm winged! *I use they/them pronouns!!* i apologize for my lack of capital letters lol. I'm non-binary (i describe my gender as nonspecific), gynesexual, in my early teens, aand...AFAB? basic stuff, first off XD I'm an INFP-T, sun cancer moon scorpio ascendant virgo (or simply a cancer ;P), and also..neigh whinny. XD also a woodpecker in native american zodiac stuffs! Iiiiii'm an artist & a furry! been both since same amount of time (pretty much when 2014 began, so over 3 years now x3) I've had...have an emotionally abusive family, tend to get depressed (sometimes for no clear reason), self-harm (i try not to though), was absolutely cruel to myself in pretty much the entirety of 2015 which ended up kinda traumatizing me, i'm not mentally healthy though i don't know what i'd be diagnosed with, tend to be lonely and feel really, really unloved (even though i have several friends and people outside my family never seem to be really 'against' me), ...and other stuff i'm pretty sure i forgot XD my heart is completely numb (non-physically speaking lol), so that's...fun :'D all those above things are why i'm here, i guess...i got issues, i don't wanna just sit in the dark alone with them anymore, so... my fav music artists are: AURORA, Passion Pit (they really help me cope, it's not my fault, i'm happy is the best for coping <3), Imogen Heap, Florence + The Machine (though i don't listen to them much anymore), Sea Oleena!! so calming and pretty and gooooood <33 LIGHTS, aand once in a blue moon i listen to Dan Gibson's stuff :P mary lambert is a good too!! i just wanna say my next birthday is on 7/17/17 aND THAT MAKES ME SO HAPPY AND EXCITED AND AAA <33 so COOOL although i don't play video games too much anymore, i like little big planet (main series games are best), i was a total nerd for pokemon most of my life lol, some online games and...yeah XD i like games with loots of customization options LOL i could put a likes/dislikes list here...nyegh...hECK... i like naturey stuff and i hate discrimination, to sum it up i really tend to be enabling (in the negative sense), so i'm really sorry for that xD;; i'm not very good at sleeping, but i try to stay nocturnal to avoid my family :'D i'm homeschooled & don't have/want a job so i can do that lol *violently gurgles* i hAVE A CAT,, if i have any bad grammar it's very, very likely i'm doing that jokingly, lol, i'm a native english speaker (but wanna learn french, gODDAMN I'M SICK OF ENGLISH) anyway..yeah. i talk a lot. sorry about that XD but i hope that this place helps me with the problems i have, to help me get support and such...may it be beneficial for me ^^ *is like 10% asleep as i write this*

Bio

Recent forum posts

Talk to an expert therapist

Welcome It takes strength to seek out assistance with managing life's many...

About Us

Get Started

Online Therapy

Terms

Bio