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elka1ska
1 208 M Embraced 2
PathStep 1 Compassion hearts24 Forum posts19 Forum upvotes14 Current upvotes14 Age GroupAdult Last activeAugust, 2026 Member sinceJuly 27, 2026
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Bruh
Self-Harm Recovery / by elka1ska
Last post
 August 30th
...See more Just as I thought everything is going super well, I find out that my bf of almost 7 months has cheated on me. Again.. I've let it slide the first time, we we're together for a week, he wasn't over his ex and they kissed. No biggie But he did it again. He will tell me his side of the story on monday, I will beat his *** so much, that nobodey is going to be able to recognize him. He kissed 13 year old girl and he is 17... I'm ending things deffinetley tommorow when we are together in person.
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I finally did it
Self-Harm Recovery / by elka1ska
Last post
 August 18th
...See more Today, I finally told him. He was so sad, when he heard it, but quickly turned it into super supportive mode. He comforted me, told me that he's glad that I told him and everytime I think about doing it, I "must" call him, that he would rather be awake at 1am than me doing something and suffering alone. It felt so relieving, but so wrong at the same time, but i'm glad that I finally took the curage and told him. He thanked me for telling him over and over again. I couldn't be more happy tbh. I feel so relieved rn, as if a stone had fallen from my heart. I love how he handled it. How he comforted me, because we were talking about something that was happening and it triggered me so bad, that I told myself "I really should tell him now". Emma and others who responded to my stories really helped me realize, that I shouldn't suffer with this alone. And I wasn't even alone. I had and still have you guys. I just wanted to thank everyone who even read my stories and didn't say anything, you really helped me and I love yall so so much and I wish you only the best. It takes time, but at some point you realize, that you're really not alone if you suffer with litearly anything (I hope that this makes sense, english is not my first language). This sadly doesn't mean that I won't have any thoughts in the future or whatsoever, but I'm going to know that I have someone that is going to support me no matter what. All my love goes to you guys, love you <3
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That one thing
Self-Harm Recovery / by elka1ska
Last post
 August 17th
...See more Today was really good. I didn't have any urges to harm myself. I think it's because my mom was at work, nobodey presured me to do things, nobodey told me that i'm not enough, nobodey told me that my boyfriend should ve ashamed of me and break up with me. I was just waiting for that one thing. I was waiting for the call from my bf. But today, he forgot about me. He just playd minecraft with his friend, he didn't even told me that he couldn't make it today. It can seem like it's not that big of a deal, but for me, it is. It's that one thing I litearly live for. He's my hope, my everything. I just can't do the thing i've been planning, because he stepped into my life. I couldn't wait to hear his voice, even for 1 minute, I would be happy with that. I'm just sad that he has time for games with his friends, but not even 1 minute for me. I feel guilty everytime I can't make the call, but I just feel like he doesn't care if we're calling ir not. Everytime I build up the currage to tell him about my sh, that I've been clean for almost 3 years, that I wouldn't probably be here if he didn't stepped into my life..he tells me that he can't make it. This isn't the fisrt time that this happened. Maybe I take this too seriously, I don't know. I just feel so lonely rn. When I visited him, he took my phone bcs he wanted to play some games. I was so scared he would find my sloth with these type of apps. I wish he did but didn't at the same time. I want to tell him, but i'm so scared. I don't know what of, I just feel like I can't tell him.
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Down again
Self-Harm Recovery / by elka1ska
Last post
 August 8th
...See more I want to do this. Maybe I want something more, too, and I don’t even know why. I’m surrounded by great people, especially one person I live for, but then I start thinking about it again. Just when I tell myself that things will be okay after almost four years, something comes up that I end up mulling over for weeks on end, and all my progress is lost. It doesn’t even help me anymore to open up, talk about it, and stuff like that. Not even to the one I’m here for, and that’s what’s destroying me the most.
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Figured it out #2
Self-Harm Recovery / by elka1ska
Last post
 July 30th
...See more My mother is really victimizing herself. I said ,,ok, do it, but dont say that I dont do anything in this house.." I said it so calmly and she stormed out and started crying.. She later said that she didnt do anything wrong and my father finally stood "against" her with me and stood up with me. She was sooo mad, and shes the one who says that im always overreacting and that "this generation" has so much mental issues and crap like this. Im glad that I finally found out that shes the "problem". But I love her and I always will.
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Figured it out
Self-Harm Recovery / by elka1ska
Last post
 July 28th
...See more I think I've figured out what my trigger is. It's my mother. She’s constantly criticizing me, twisting everything I say, and turning it against me. I’ll say something totally “depressing”—like today I said, “Why should I do that when you’re going to do it anyway…”—because she does everything for me, and then she lashes out at me, saying I’m good for nothing. She’s always complaining that she does everything, but when I say I’ll do something and don’t do it within 5 seconds, she gets *** off, yells at me, and goes to do it herself.
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Apps...
Self-Harm Recovery / by elka1ska
Last post
 July 28th
...See more Some apps cant be for real anymore.. I didnt even post a single story and i got banned for ever 😭🤣
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