Let's discuss issues
@pandanfe As I look over my 20s, I feel that I have definitely evolved but it has not been a walk in the park, I've dealt with a plethora of emotional issues over time. Currently, I've been managing my relationships at work while being in grad school (I'm in my last year) and it's not a walk in the park. Balancing work and school is enough, but I also have a lot of financial pressure due to inflation and not realizing that my finances caught up to me quicker than what I expected. I'm taking life one day at a time, but I'm hoping that I can make it to the last year of grad school while maintaining my full time job (that's my serious goal).
I'm trying to do better with my in depth relationships while growing pass my previous trauma. Although all of this is happening at once, I'm grateful that I stumbled into 7 Cups so I can process my feelings and manage. Adulting is not simple in today's current climate, things are expensive and building relationships seem to be easier said than done, but I'm managing as best as I can.
I've been opening up about this all day today. I am feeling better for talking about everything at once, I appreciate you for asking. I'll be on 7 Cups regularly to help my depression and anxiety.
@sonnieeee
Thank you very much for bringing in your experience with us and I totally agree with you that adulting isn't as easy as it seems, especially with relationships and finance. The lack of proper socialization (within the majority in this generation) and increasing expenses while the earning remains same is just trolling over. Only if we didn't have to deal with these issues, things would be comparatively easier.
You've been really strong to be able to balance work and study while managing finance and a relationship while working out with previous trauma. I hope things work your ways for you 💛 And I'm so glad that you joined 7 cups to help you with your depression and anxiety. It's really nice to share struggles and achievement out and feel lighter. Is there specific part of adulting that you find interesting or overwhelming at this point of life?
@pandanfe
The idea that you are failing in your 20s. This is an issue that is on my mind a lot. Like, are you where you are supposed to be?
Note: We don’t even have it all together in our 30s. Possibly older too. Like… does anyone??? Hehe
@jesusredeemedme2425
right. I think you have it all together when you realize that you're doing great and that you're doing what makes you happy. Not trying to say don't try to move forward, but you're still doing great and keep moving forward at your own pace <3
@gemini02
As an ambitious person, I totally understand. 🥹🫂
So the way I cope with it... I've made a deal with myself that I'll be happy no matter where I find myself. I'll find something to be happy about. Life has taught me , many a times, that just avoiding uncomfortable positions brings almost the same happiness as getting that 1 thing I wanted. And it requires a lot less effort.
@gregariousSquare298 I like this take a lot! Lately I've been trying to do better with stress management and a large part is contentment. If we can have contentment moment to moment then things don't have to be so negative or intense.
@sonnieeee
I totally agree with you. It's matter of small contentment. sometimes just playing around with humor works better instead of walking around with heavy heads. I just laugh out or shrug the difficult moments to find peace and not get bothered while I've a lot on my plate XD
Also, you're doing great with stress management with contentment. We would love to hear more about your stress management journey if you're comfortable sharing it with us 💛
@gregariousSquare298
you're talking my mind, avoiding uncomfortable positions brings a lot of happiness as well. Of course, we're not talking in course of "staying in comfort zone", but more like don't fall for things that we're just saying 'yes' because we couldn't say 'no'. I would really appreciate if you could elaborate more on "uncomfortable position" part because this is like the only thing I can think about, right now, while it comes to avoiding uncomfortable positions.
@gemini02
OMG that is soooooooo me, especially because I was admitted to elementary school one year later than most kids, and I also took gap years after high school, I used to feel a bit insecure about falling behind. Then, I don't know, my brain just worked weirdly and I'm not even kidding at this point. My brain was like 'hello, what am I rushing for?' I used to feel this each time I compare myself to anyone, but again, there's still trace of it, that's a bit insecure and I've to consciously remind myself, and I totally get your point. Are we supposed to be where we're supposed to be? But again, what's supposed and who supposed and for what? hahaha i feel like i'm just ranting at this point...
Anyways, this doesn't change the fact that the question about our state is there to trigger us from one time to another. How do you guys deal with it? Does this trigger make you more productive or does it redirect you towards procrastination and binge watching and .... yea I really liked this point. Thank you for bringing it up
@pandanfe There are many issues like the things I messed up in a relation...but I don't think it will be just not so interesting. So the another issue I wanna talk is I had a company in my college..for placement so there were 3 round in which the 1st round was apptitude I think I atleast did average in that...and 2nd round was coding test there were 2 questions I think students who did 2 questions were pretty rare...I think it couldn't be more than 10 or 12 and I was one of the student who did both the questions...next I had gd round the third round...I think I did average in that too. So here's the thing...my friend who didn't write code none at all got selected and the other guy who probably did the same in gd just like me... average and he had just written one question of the code in 2nd round written test, he got selected too..so I wanted to know where I did went wrong now there's my another friend who went to the final round and got placed i asked him about this then I got to know that the company doesn't want to show the results for some reason. 😂 I am just frustrated and sad that even after doing things properly I didn't got selected. And I don't even know where I went wrong.
@Aceluv
Did the other competitors have a reservation/inclusivity advantage ? Like they were disabled/minority race/ etc ? I've heard that's important.
@Aceluv
I'm sorry to hear that. It's unfair to you that the one who performed poorly than you got selected but not you. I have multiple hypothesis related to this, it's either the company was corrupted, or the company may be looking for specific skill-set and the whole examination was only to find that specific set or like @gregariousSquare298 mentioned, the reservation for minority group thing. Could be anything, really.
I would probably try to reach out to them and ask for the feedback, more specifically the strengths and weakness and what can I improve for better selectivity chance for the next trial... sort of things. They may or may not give feedback but its worth the try. And just so you know, you did your part, and I'm pretty sure you'll end up with a good placement as well 💛
@pandanfe loneliness 🥺
@decisiveHickory832
Take care. 😊
@gregariousSquare298
Have you chatted with Noni ? Helped me a lot.
@decisiveHickory832
The issue is real. In my opinion, it mostly depends on how and where one socializes. If you would give us a bit of background to your social life, we would be able to make the discussion a bit personalized for you, and if not, if you're talking in general, it's still a good discussion topic. And I really appreciate for bringing it up.
I can go first about my social life. I barely got any friends that I hang out outside of the school. I barely talk to anyone on class too, and even if i did, it's like very small talks about the class materials. So for me personally, attending the school clubs have helped meet more people. Sometimes if I'm feeling social, i tend to exchange contacts with other people from the club, if not, I still get to have meaningful discussions here and there which is my favorite part. There's this one special person that I hang out with outside of the school, and maybe one or two friends at times, but that's it.
Oh! yea, i socialize online tho. I've long distance friends that I love to chat with because at this age, it's kind of hard to make friends who are like your childhood best friends. I'm not saying it's not possible, because I know some of the other students who just walks up to everyone and talk, i don't know if they feel lonely, but yea. My voice is very soft due to which it is hard to make conversation in groups, i also tend to stay quite while others are talking, which means i'm not taking space for myself. And these sounds like an excuse, and maybe it is, but I try sometimes and it works, and most of the other times, i just don't open my mouth at all. I'm more of a listener. I listen, react and am done. With these little to no interaction, it hinders my social circle and is very limited.
@pandanfe
Being a student while struggling with life/mental health. It's something I need discussion with.
@gregariousSquare298
As a student, one has many issues. Starting off picking from right major to graduating on to picking up right career and then having stress to compete with peers for highly competitive market to now also having to compete with AI. And above all, managing the financial state (present or future) to future planning... everything is very stressful and can impact the mental health.
Not to undermine the positivity of a student life, it is where one gets to find out their interests, for some, it leads to many opportunity via school resources like fun activities, and internships and so on.
It's a very broad subject, Which specific part are you looking to discuss?
@pandanfe
I struggle with lust , anxiety and depression. I am from a place where if people found out that I am addicted to this stuff, they'll outcast me and my parents will be so deeply disappointed and ashamed. I have been struggling for a long time now and I am trying to get myself out, but I've figured I can't do it alone.
Hi young adult here. I would say society's expectations from you
@pandanfe
As a young man, who lost his mother at 20,I am struggling with the thoughts when I mistreated her and when I cud have given her more happiness and cud hav taken care for her. I think I failed there.
How too make real frienss
@pandanfe Being a late bloomer. For most of my tween and teen years, I was so doom and gloom that I didn't see a future for myself, so I put no effort into things like jobs or driver's ed. Now that I'm an adult, my starting line is much further back than most people's, and it can be so deeply frustrating.