Boyfriend is breaking up with me for Graduate school
Hello everyone,
My boyfriend for more than a year broke the news to me last week that he basically wants us to break up because he’s going to graduate school in the Fall. He wants this breakup because he said verbatim that he will be with other women once he gets there. His school is in another state, so we won’t be near each other anymore. He even cancelled plans he made just us to spend time together for Memorial Day (US holiday) because we live far away from each now and barely see each other.
I realized that he never really loved me and was just with me for convenience. I’m not sure what to think or do. Any advice will be greatly appreciated.
Thank you
@fearlessPlum1988
You dodged a massive bullet. Be glad he showed his true colors now and not later! You deserve so much better <3
*big hugs*
<3 I'm sure everyone days this but there are more people around. Take what you got, the good times. Ponder them, rejoice for them. Do not regret anything.
Now take these thoughts, and tell people around you that you want more. More happiness. More connectivity. More love.
If you take your loss, and pretend (to yourself) that it's going to be okay, it will be just fine. I absolutely miss the partners I had that 'got away' but I absolutely LOVE the lady I'm with now. 13 years so far, 3 kids. I'm 39. It took awhile and a lot, I mean a LOT of tears, begging, pleading with people. None of it helped.
The day I stopped being single was the day after I decided it was okay to be single. People want confidence, and they won't let go of a good one.
Silly people let go of good things all the time. This isn't our fault.its 100% theirs. We can try our best to convince people to feel wonderful feelings, but the only truth is if your feelings and goals vibe together. Without that vibe, connectivity will dissipate and longevity will fail.
Vibe. Vibe happy, vibe fun,.watch some shows and movies you like and begin to embody the person you want to be. Cast aside stress and just fly.
Hope this helps.
I’m sorry this happened to you. I just want you to know that he’s missing out and that you’re a gift. Treat this experience as a gift itself and that it’s making room for something better along.
@fearlessPlum1988
Sorry to hear what you are going through! Hugs*
I'm not sure if we can give you better advice than you could give yourself. Imagine if what happened to you happened to your most treasured friend/ family member. What would you say to him/ her?
Remember... You are THAT treasured friend/ family to someone. <3 You are worthy.
I'm sorry that this happened to you and im sure you are feeling heartbroken over this..In time you will heal and over come and realize that this was a learning experience.
Take time to heal..and at least you have your freedom and wernt hurt by finding out that he cheated on you which would hurt a lot worse.
I'm not going to say he didn't love but he obviously cared a lot about you and sounds like he thought things over. He was honest when he stated the reason on why he wanted to break up. So at least give him credit for that.
You have your freedom and time to enjoy summer break and not have to worry about anyone else but you. Heal, enjoy it and remeber no one can love you like you..discover yourself and what you want..Love will find you when you are not looking.
Be good to yourself, love yourself and enjoy life to the fullest without boundaries.
Your free.
Love and peace ❤️
@fearlessPlum1988 His loss, fearless. There are better men out there, you deserve so much more than that him. I'd suggest focusing on yourself or picking up a new hobby. Keep yourself busy and growing. i'm going through something similar and realized could do better, so i'm learning Japanese right now. It's fun! maybe you could try something like that too. Also listen to music, dance along, and enjoy, you deserve joy!
@fearlessPlum1988
Upon reading your post, I thought on the opening lines from Canterbury Tales by Geoffery Chaucer:
"Whan that Aprill with his shoures soote
The droghte of March hath perced to the roote
"When April with its sweet showers
Has pierced the drought of March to the root"
This picture shows tigerlily flowers from PetiteSouris' garden
For me I see renewal after long periods of hurt and stagnation. April showers bring us hope of beautiful new beginnings and awakens our purpose on earth. I feel at peace in knowing that in nature we see resilience. An ending brings about a new beginning, and perhaps for you this ending will bring new beginnings. New beginnings may not be sudden but gradual, and it may not be grand but subtle. For me, my recent new beginning has been sudden and subtle: I found joy in connecting with nature by gardening, hiking, feeding wildbirds. I share by story to encourage you, you will find a new beginning too.
Just believe you are worthy of new beginnings!
You are lucky he was honest with you he could have lied and said he would be faithful but that's unfair and disrespectful
Live and learn and walk away your time is too valuable to mourn the loss of something you never really had