I have a crush?!
35 f - I just got out of a big ol’ relationship (not officially married but we lived like we were for over a decade). It’s been 4 months. Almost immediately I started crushing on some guy at work. I may have even had a slight crush on him before, but I had no interest or wonder as far as pursuing things goes because EYEEE was fully committed to my dumb idiot ex. (Ok try to ignore the sass, but also it could be important).
I love the idea of a crush. That magical silly phase before you really know someone. Being excited to see them, looking for them. Wanting to impress them or trying to act cool 😎 lol it’s fun. It’s something I missed experiencing while I was in a relationship.
My overthinking kicks into gear when I start feeling tempted to make a move. I still have very strong feelings for my ex. I want to get back together some day, but I know it’s not our time right now. Would it hurt to explore another relationship (of sorts) in the meantime? First, there’s one thing among many others that my ex (AND other exes) and crush have in common that I should maybe probably avoid: a history of serious substance abuse. The addictive personalities persist strongly, though the habits have been tamed. Second, I don’t wanna go breaking any hearts (including my own) and I’m afraid that more serious feelings could emerge. Third, I WORK WITH THE SOMBISH. I don’t want to get my men that way anymore lol
I have so many reasons why not to say something to him and one reason why: I am so curious.
So... tell me what you think about this, generally speaking. Got any advice on whether or not to pursue? Or how I’d even go about it?
I dunno I just wanna talk about it!
😂
@pasterofmuppets
Thanks for sharing 🩷
I'm sorry you've broken up after so long.
I cannot tell you what to do, but if it were me, I can only be honest and say I wouldn't pursue it, especially at work, makes things even more awkward if it doesn't work out.
And if your heart is still with your ex, you still have a few things to work through 💛
@pasterofmuppets First off be careful with workplace relationships. However, you can find love in the strangest places. Just flirt to be sure he feels the same way and do a group karaoke, a drink after work, or a trivia night or something to break the ice. If you ask him and he says yes, get some liquid courage in you and go for it! Wera the good bra and *** and groom that thing !!! She Ready!🤣💑
@GoldenCoconut365
Yup... this.
@pasterofmuppets
I'm not here to give advice but ...
crushes are fun as heck! Enjoy it! Sometimes they last, sometimes they fade out, sometimes it can work into something more. It makes life a little bit more exciting. Yeah we get tempted to push the boundaries and see where things are at with the other person but why? We're not in a hurry to go anywhere. I bet it makes going to work more fun too!
@pasterofmuppets Why is it so hard for us to put ourselves back out there? I worry constantly if someone will be able to handle my flaws with my goodies as well. not just the sexual aspect which is scary alone, but me as a person. We as humans are all flawed in some way. Sometimes our flaws make us perfect for the right person. social media has messed us up. Some platforms like this one can bring people together, but some actually are disguised as community while they strip all of our self confidence away with photoshopped pictures of all these perfect BBL or super skinny chicks. Yeah it looks nice but beauty is truly in the eye of the beholder. To me, We ARE ALL Beautiful🫶
@GoldenCoconut365
We really have to swim against the current to maintain love for ourselves in a world that doesn't seem to actually value anyone or anything. But I think we get better and stronger the more we practice that.
This community seems to be free from unfair judgment. I'm so grateful to it and to you for sharing what's on your mind! 💗
@GoldenCoconut365
@TovaCares76
omg I love you both 😄
It's really just been kinda fun and cute to have a crush. I feel like a teenager lol I've decided to keep it on the down lowwww. Not telling anyone at work and limiting who I tell outside of work. It feels nice to have a "secret" but I do think he's on to me. So that makes me giggle too, having what seems like an unspoken understanding and mutual interest. I like getting to know him, and I'll see how strong the pull gets, if it does get any stronger!
