Confused and not sure how to feel as boyfriend had a child with another woman and never told me

Hi everyone, I hope you’re having a great weekend and sorry for the long post.

A week ago I found out my boyfriend has a son with a woman he dated a couple of years ago before we met. No problem, I have children too who I love and which my bf knows about. But he never told me about his son and told me he never wanted children. No problem if he chooses to have children or not.

I love children and am hurt he never told me as I saw in a text as he showed me something else on his phone. He said he never told me because she trapped him with pregnancy and was worried I would judge him, it hurt more he felt he couldn’t tell me. I understand it might have hurt him and said I realise that and he can talk to me about anything.

I am struggling with my emotions as I have had abusive and controlling relationships in the past - that he knows about. I want to trust him but said I feel as soon as I let my walls down he broke my trust and because of past experiences might be cautious.

we had a great relationship up until this point and spoke about how it has made me feel and I understand how he may feel. I want to relax but am struggling to get my head round this right now, am I overreacting and should I just carry on and let time do it’s bit and heal. I now feel as this is one thing he didn’t tell me there might be other things. He said there isn’t and doesn’t want to lose me.

Thanks for reading and any advice would be appreciated.