Cheri’s Connection Corner - People Pleasers & Self Care

@SunShineAlwaysGrateful

UPDATED TAGLIST 8/28/2023

1st part

@00WHY00 @1Marg1 @24963534 @24Help1 @4Rainbow42 @5catsandme @8Khaleesi8 @allen99 @ArinDee @Actuallynobody017 @adaptableOcean4193 @adventurousBranch3786 @adventurousSugar1991 @affableowl5126 @affectionateCat9553 @affectionatePear7889 @agreeablestrawberries1285 @ahaller @ahds2k @ahel58 @akbj @AKmarshmallow @Aksabode @alan254 @alanapiana1970 @alleywood13 @amanda @ambitiousNectarine1482 @Amelia2324 @amiablePeace77 @amiableTortoise2797 @AmiYumi @amusingcranberry1537 @AmusingJet302 @anderly @andy @Angelface50 @AnnieIsMe @aquaCake3636 @ARIBA5 @Artemis13579 @AshcloudMac @Aspace4u @Awesomesummer1628 @ayeyaeyaaaaaaaa @azureblueheron @azuladragon34 @Baby1120 @ballooningSloth @BaltimoreSpring @bamafan96 @Barltik2065 @Beanno @beautifulsoul @becausepuppies @Beck @becknit @beachyone @believing777 @berta0322 @Bestmaple2045 @bestplum1189 @betheileen @better2Bbrave @beverlianne @bigalt21 @Billyjoe9717 @bimmernizer @BirdsWhoWrite @bisketties @bklnstar @BLSD2021 @bluebell34 @BlueEyes1819 @blueOrange6725 @BlueSky0708 @Bluesky1964 @bluevelvet3 @Blugreg @bogartfan @bouncyBeach42 @BookishWendy @bouncyVoice4149 @breezyoctopus @brightChestnut3152 @BrightSugar1923 @bubblePomegranate7179 @BurdensDown @cafelatte46 @cal1860 @CaliforniaViv @calmblueocean @calmVase7032 @Cammiecat @CandyBubblegumSprinkles @carefreeheart57 @CarefulGrapes590 @carefulsailboat231 @carelady @caringone1004 @CaringPanda45 @caringPumpkin64 @CaringSharon @carscarey @casey90 @cathy @catlady @catmandu @caughtinthemiddle @Cazzy8752 @Cheerie @chickadee123 @Chro411924 @CHT @CintaBali @classylady521 @Cliffg747 @coach411 @Communicativepenny8383 @CompassionateLand2815 @Confused7461 @convivialCake8989 @ConvivialFriend9402 @Cookiecrumbles7079 @CoriF @courageousCoconut7282 @CourageousDaisy1111 @CourageousSpring2022 @courteousLime9432 @CreativeYard1702 @crimsonShade6782 @CtownMimi @ctw1237 @Cubby2020 @curiousbutterfly77 @currentwise @cyanBirch4288 @CyclingThroughLife @DanaMH @DancingJoy811 @dapperPond2037 @Dave94305 @debbiehun @decisivetangerine2856 @decisiveBanana1981 @DeeGold @determinedNectarine9383 @dillon8524 @DinaElwy @diofono @diplomaticoak9588 @discreetMelon5938 @discreettriangle87 @DiscretOcean7936 @doginashirt @dolphinlver @Doodles7 @duces @ecstaticlght @einarsgirl @elderfarm @Electric100 @ElizabethGiovi @EmbStitcher33 @empathicForest15 @Emptynest2020 @endearingLion70 @Enthusiasticnest1089 @equinox56 @Eva66 @Every1ahome @ExDesertScapegoat @exuberantAvocado5095 @fairmindedStrawberries7429 @Faithfulapple2400 @faithlove1111 @Favor2020 @favour @FlowerLily23 @FoolsSelf @forcefulFriend4768 @forcefulStrings1005 @forcefulWriter32 @forko23 @Freeskier @friendly10 @friendlyCat50 @fromthetent81 @frothyMagic6772 @FusionX33 @GabbyGee @Gabriellegahnsuksah @Gale1032 @galfromaway @gardenyarn @generousBalloon786 @gentleEast4230 @gentleLand5245 @GiftedEmpath3 @goldilocks1041 @goodmelon8247 @goodYard1477 @gracefulDay3692 @GrammatoBoys @Grandma1 @GrandmaLolly @Gramma2FnM @Grammy23 @Greenpear036 @greenSummer1236 @gregariousKiwi9594 @gregariousZebra21 @guitarman087 @Gwen1963 @GypsyRed @HaloCompany88 @Heather2020 @helloBike4402 @hellopusher @helloTalker8798 @honestPeach5447 @Hotaru419 @hounddog2021 @HY00 @iamroni @Iamwhoiamwhoami @icedcoffee211109 @IHDW1982 @ihtak @impartialDrum1848 @indigolilly1500 @indigoMoon1246 @innerLove @introvertedextrovert2122 @intuitiveBunny8426 @intuitiveFriend1097 @Irene2552 @IWuzADuck @JackKost @jackrock @japanesegardengirl @jazzgtr @Jim @jlmouranet @jillwings7@JolivetteListens @JoniGirl @Judecat42W1370

@SunShineAlwaysGrateful

2nd Part Taglist

@junem @justbecause @Justbreathingx9 @JustExisting1027 @JustMe1225 @justpassingthrough10 @K8tjee @kala @Katbtrying552 @Kathy1212 @kathy3667 @Kavajava @kcollier6517 @Kevin0291 @kickiree @kickan75 @Kimberley555 @KindblueEyes @kindCloud141 @Kira09 @kit4228 @kitty2018 @kittycat15 @klemen @koyaanisqatse8 @Kurt789 @LadySnowcat @LakeGirl819 @Lara @lateasusual @Lauren63 @LavenderDaily @lesjon @lelahni @Lifer @lightBalsam5585 @LightSoul108 @lilaj3796 @LimegreenNorth1124 @LindaWinNJ @lisamac724 @ListeningKaty @livefreely04 @LivingLovingLifeRecovery @livingwithbpdx2 @lledmonds1969 @Lolowise475 @lonea @Lonelybeth @LoneShade @lookingforpeace @LostanLonely @Lostinlove50 @love @Love2Boat65 @LovecraftianHorror @LoveResearcher @lrsmith9636 @LucianX @luv2shop @mabelanne20 @madhu @Maka10 @mamamel @mamapants @MariaLands @Marspock @meforexample @Melayla @Melissa22320 @Melliemel1971 @mellisendis @metta2u @mettagirl @MidwesternCalmSeeker @Mindy @ministermichelle @MissPen@MistyMagic @Mla69 @mm2022 @modestOcean7984 @modestwatermelon2938 @moi2016 @mommabear0562 @MondoRalph @Mooboxer @moocher @morecake @Motherofcats1955 @MrKindness @MsVee2021 @MusicCandy @Musicman50 @musicwithbrass @mutter3 @myer @MysticSoul88 @navyAcai7149 @neatandtidy72 @neverendingtime23 @nippycat @No1Angel68 @nobodyimportantmn @Nogift @NormaAnne @Oddball76779 @oel @OffMyTrack @OliveCamp8456 @omez125 @OmWeAreOne @Open12 @OptimisticAcres4817 @optimisticRaspberries5247 @outofspace7 @PatienceImpatiens @PaytonGlover @Peace1221 @peaceandlove65 @peachy53 @PepperBunny @pgreen6840 @phantomsmilesphilosophicalacai7803 @PitbullMom9 @philosophicalAcres8914 @philosophicalKiwi4956 @pianocat @placidplum3193 @pluckystrings4696 @plumPapaya7147 @plumSkies6526 @politePear3867 @positiveriver9935 @potatoxcrispztrish @powerfulMaple1852 @practicalbalsam @PracticalCat2637 @proactiveCup703 @Puddinpen @PurpledPeach @purplefan5510 @purplepansies8591 @purpletangerine87 @purpletree4652 @PurpleWater74 @pxidis @Qooo @quietbeach575 @quietFlower25 @quietlightning @quietSail6485 @quietStrawberries9260 @Ran3707 @RainbowRosie @rationalWater7635 @readytolisten7799 @RebelliousMirror @redOrange9587@redCococnut7440 @redPenny @Redpeppers @Redrhapsody @reliablemoon26 @reliablemoon6376 @repen13 @Resourceful2021 @rhoda @richyShiny39 @RideaRainbow @River416 @Roger57 @RogueOne1983 @Ross63 @roxymar @ruffneckred @Ruthanny1243 @sailinsunshine @SallyMoore @sallymander36 @samSympa3 @Sandidegeer @SarahKind @sb805 @ScarletLand3247 @ScarletPear1945 @SeaLady @Seasidelady61 @secretMap2091 @Sedtzl1 @seeker1898 @SeekerSher @seekinghappy55 @seniorlady @sensibleBunny2134 @sensiblePal7535 @Shycat542 @shycranberry2308 @sillyrabbit7 @sincereGrapefruit4682 @sincerelandsincereOak6832 @SKHK @Skyglider @Skyy0 @SleeplessVet @Smilintru67 @smokescrunch @sngrlittle @snugglyLight2001 @sonerii @soothingArrow47 @sophiaaiello @SoulfulCat22 @soulsings @spielmanjr @SpreadAloha @StartExploring @stayingsafe @SteampunkOkc @stilltrying126 @sthompso @StormyTimes @straightforwardKiwi7811 @stressBear @strugglingtocope99 @Sue1111 @Sue88 @sunnyplum5193 @SunnySpruce3523 @sunnyZebra2336 @Sunshine4691 @SunShineAlwaysGrateful @SusyKaploosy @SuzieQ1 @swammi01 @SweetSami @swim215 @swinston222 @swordpsalm @Tabbysflower @Tailormade1 @tanimaya @Tanq2u @Tawanda526 @tealCranberry7379 @tealDog6333 @tealPlace1858 @Teresa416 @terrig996 @TexasTabby @thecaringone @thoughtfulRaspberries8714 @ThreeFires @Tish1982 @tranquilheart @Treat @Trying5555 @turquoiseJar411 @twidget @twm @Tyedyedbutterfly @understandingSea8000 @Vadras @versatileHickory1709 @Vintagelung @VioletVeritas @Walker7957 @WarmWool @waterdragon81 @weatherphoto @WharfRat @Whisper292 @whisperingfairy7 @whispersrlonely @whitewingeddove1107 @Wicket51 @willow3836 @wittyNest2941 @WonnderWoman @Woodlandwalk42 @wordnerd @worstpossibleusername @WorkingitThrough2 @worthystruggle @WrenegadeWen @xe14 @xinero @xrosez @Yashoda108 @Yushix @youcancallmeLili @zaramerch @Zengrl

I'm cayley and I'm a people pleaser. I've struggled with it my whole life. I don't have the courage to change my situation but my go to for self care is music.

How can you simplify your life by releasing things that don’t serve you well??

The place where I go for peer-to-peer group meetings has gone through some changes since I started there. The pandemic had an effect because the place was closed for several months, then had new rules when it reopened. Attendance has gone down, too. There are fewer group meetings for me to attend as the groups I needed most don't take place anymore. The few I still go to aren't much help. They guy who facilitates those groups may quit, because he's being treated very poorly by the others. If he goes, I won't go there anymore at all. That would simplify my life somewhat. In some ways, though I might need more complication in my life, to get me motivated to do something for once.

Could you use more self care?

Probably - I'm not sure what it is, though.

What kind of self care do you enjoy?

Do bike rides count? There's something about those bike rides, though. They're generally between 5.5 miles and 8.5 miles long, and take one to one and a half hours. While I'm riding, all the other bike riders fly by me like I'm standing still. I don't know what's wrong with me, but I can't ride that fast.

Nothing, I feel losing passion from doing anything for my life. 

I am a people pleaser, I have been my entire life. I think it has to do with how I was raised and all of the abuse. Anyway, sorry to drag down the conversation.

Could I use more self care? Absolutely! I honestly don’t think you can have too much, as long as you take care of your day to day responsibilities.

What kind of self care do you enjoy? I draw and am teaching myself how to play the piano and guitar. I love music, it has saved my life and I have always wanted to learn how to play, so I decided to teach myself.

@SunShineAlwaysGrateful
I find that we overgive because we know how to give where as when people give to us it's often shallow and doesn't meet the target. It's a common misconception that people who give so much can't recieve. They can't - they just don't want scraps.