Not finding my people

@Notsogoodtoday

I feel out of place in chatrooms so often too, it is easier to blame our selves thinking something must be too wrong with us or we are too different than others to be able to fit in somehow but from afar I've noticed it's the surroundings that impact more , the kind of people, our mood, chatroom pace , multiple conversations going on at the same time etc

Sometimes it is too fast with multiple topics going on for people to have any meaningful conversations or to say or talk with some one in detail , I don't think brief messages or random ones would ever help anyone get to know someone on a more closer level , one reason why I prefer forums more!

maybe you can try forums also? There are different topics and categories so you can explore more if you find something of interest or something you do care about also and then connect with like minded people there?

I'm happy you tried because I know it really isn't easy ;(

hope you do find some nice company irl :)

@Notsogoodtoday Hi there, I understand that open groups have multiple chats going on at once and it can be hard to find more extensive support or connection with members. I'm not sure if you've heard about our Huddles - these are closed groups and people say they've found them to be very helpful. If you are interested and have any more questions, you can let me know. We do have an anxiety as well as social anxiety Huddle going on and its only been 2 weeks, I'm sure everyone in the group would love to connect with you.

@Notsogoodtoday Hi. Doubt you're a species unto yourself. Remember that what your doctor is asking you to do is build experience and skills. Sometimes with socializing it can be like trying to learn to ride a bike with no instruction and no training wheels. The environment you are in makes a huge difference. You might be riding that bike ok in one type of setting and crash it in another. Online has lots of challenges, but also some advantages. Don’t get discouraged and don’t internalize your experience as if it is your fault or shortcoming. Be patient, you’ll get this soon enough. Also keep in mind, even if we get good at it, we can fine tune and tweak social skills over a lifetime. Part of relating to others is learning about ourselves. It’s a cool journey, but at first we are afraid of falling off the bike, and sometimes even when we got a handle on it, we don’t see a pothole and we crash. It can be more or less painful. But unlike riding a bike, it is unlikely to be fatal. Bruised feelings. We also learn to brush those off soon enough. Happy riding!

@Notsogoodtoday

Hi ! It's not an easy task, to find that person, whom you enjoy much pleasure conversing with.

What do you know or what topics do you are about ? Perhaps you can start a post on those to connect with people who share the same interests as you ?

Generation gaps are tough...

@Notsogoodtoday

I too don't feel that I'm connecting with anyone here.... so... perhaps I ought to take up my own advice . ha ha ha

@Gettingbettertoday

I completely understand and agree that it can be a struggle to find the right people on here to have supportive and engaging conversations here. It takes some navigating to figure out the best places to find the right connections here.

Some days, when I'm feeling pretty good, I can come and just participate in the lighter posts about silly stuff. That's easy. But when I'd like to engage in a solid conversation because I'm struggling, or just want to feel like I'm heard - those are tougher (outside of Listener discussions). The Chat groups I have found to be very..."not for the 50+ crowd." They're too much all over the place and it always feel like I've walked into a conversation between a group of 18-20 somethings. :) It's very out of place.

Thanks, @SoulfullyAButterfly, for mentioning Huddles. I had no idea about them, and I think it's something I'd benefit from.

Sometimes - like you've done here with this post - you just have to put your thoughts out there in a post and then you'll usually get the replies and engagement you're looking for.

@Gettingbettertoday I understand. I have gone to the chat rooms and do not feel like I fit in so, I just leave. I have been on here for a while now and have not made any friends or have I had a conversation with anyone on here. So, I just do the quiz part, and I have done all those and would like some new ones to do. I'm not sure how much longer I am going to continue this site.

@Gettingbettertoday

Getting :

I am inviting you to join me in the Sharing Circle chat room where a member can share their personal history and receive support ! 😊

I think we will become best or worse buddy in real life just because I feel the same way with you tho in my case it's happen in real life.

Similar personality can cause a social distraction because we ended up feeling the same way so goes if we are too different.

It's really complex ..

I find it difficult to blend or to just be anybody that people would like, I need to be someone else or act different way to be fit in certaint crowd.

In the end you're going to feel empty and feel that is overated

You are gonna meet your own people sounds kinda bulllshit right ..

Because it's indeed bulllshit.

I still want to talk with you tho ..