What were your 20's like?

@bunniewerm hi sweetie 💗 I'm currently 24 years old and life has never been certain. But when I look around  and listen I realise that the happiest people in life are those who lived with no one particular plan or path. Life happens, life changes and with it so do we💖 all we need to do is ride with it, make the most of each day, try our best and find happiness in the little things that matter💖 gives you a giant tiny hug 💗 good luck on your journey 💖

@bunniewerm

Being over than double-twenty, I think there are two extremes most people are willing to avoid in their lives. One I would call: "going through the desert", and another one: "going through the canyon".

When you go through the desert, you have a lot of blue sky above and far-reaching horizons, but no orientation points, no compass telling you which way to go. But as long as you are full of guts, young and hopeful, you can think there is a beautiful oasis over the next sand hill, and that is no mirage, and you can stay there.

When I was 12, I felt like my hands were tied. How a day like this, just before Easter, would look like? My mom would take a martyrdom role, being obsessed with cleaning and cooking (and nervously emphasizing how tired she is). My dad would begin a guerilla warfare, getting drunk with our neighbours, to oppose mom. And I and my siblings would be waiting for the Saturday evening - maybe on one of two TV channels we had they would broadcast some U.S., British or French action movie again? No mobile phones and no internet at that time.

When I was 20-24, I was alone, leaving with my grandparents, getting more education and starting my first job. But I was too eager to get married... and to make too many mistakes, both on personal and professional level.

I believe this is the moment some people start to go through the canyon. They are burdened by the values and deficiencies of their partners, the need to make money for their kids and by working hard to get rid of the mortgage one day. They have a lot of orientation points, but hardly see any blue sky above or far horizons.

That's why I think the best way is somewhere the middle.

When you are 20 it is like your operational system being newly installed. Through the years you can have many upgrades and software patches (it is called experience), some of them can make you run better and faster, some of them can make you feel heavier and slow you down. But there is still the same YOU inside. And when you are on your way to your triple-twenty you may get more "dusty and rusty", or require more frequent disc defragmentation 😉 

What I regret about my 20s is not putting more effort into my language skills, not meeting more friends, not travelling to work abroad...

Welcome to the world of over 20 - the world of freedom and (almost) unrestricted choices and unlimited capabilities 😊 

Dear @bunniewerm my fellow traveller of the cosmos,

Life is what you make of it , some people say it has no meaning and they are right but some people create their unique meaning and purpose and they're right too.

See it is all about perspectives, we fall short of goals we mess up but the choice to keep going is ours. Stuff happens and often we have no control of that but what we do have control over is ourselves and our reactions and our actions going forward.

It is the attitude that counts.

If you want something in this world , go and get it , whatever struggle you encounter is necessary for your path so acknowledge it and keep going.

Dont beat yourself up over things or over the fact that you're not taking action, just take this moment and begin!

Safe travels,

Fern

My early twenties were felt feeling the exact same way! Too be honest I think it is more common than people are willing to talk about. Especially for those who seem to have it all together. When in reality, when we are in our twenties we are still very much kids. And that’s ok! I found that having a wonderful support system in my friends helped, and then taking the time to really ask myself: what do I want out of life? Where do I want to be in twenty years? Those answers didn’t come overnight and it still took me years to figure it out but boy, once I did everything just fit into place. I’m 31 years old in medical school working towards becoming a physician and I’ve never been happier. I find myself older than my fellow classmates but I don’t let that dishearten me because I know at the end of the day I really and truly have this journey the thought and attention it deserved. I could not have done it without my wonderful friendships and support system so lean on those around you! It’s ok to feel lost right now- you’re already on the path to thinking about these things so let that contemplation drive and motivate you! Everything will work out in the end

@bunniewerm

@bunniewerm

Everyone has their own journey, and you are living your own journey through your 20's now. It's like a choose-your-own-adventure story. You'll made decisions and they will lead you down a particular path. You can't ever go back and have a do-over, but you can change your direction when you need to. Enjoy the journey. 

My 20's weren't what I expected. I had a very specific idea in mind of graduating from college and going in a very specific direction from there. The universe apparently had other plans for me and my path changed and I had to revise my ideas and ideals. In the end, while I didn't end up where I thought I was going, I had a pretty interesting journey along the way and learned a LOT from each and every experience I had. I wouldn't go back and re-do any of it because it was all valuable and makes the the human I am today. 

If I were to offer any advice, I'd say, "try to stay open-minded, make the most of every opportunity, and ask yourself what you learned from every experience you have."

@bunniewerm it's so good you're thinking about your life seriously and seeking guidance. I have regrets about my 20s that I spent mostly in the pursuit of love only to realise in my 30s life is much more than romantic relationships the films have glorified. I should have taken more responsibility. Nonetheless no matter what we do we will always make mistakes and learn. If you feel lost I'd say express as much as you can so you can figure out yourself and make the best decisions for yourself. Dont forget to enjoy yourself - this is the best time of your life. Please feel free to share more here and I'm sure people would love to help you out.

I spent my twenties sort of homeless. I had no where to go and I knew nothing about how the world worked. I had no family to turn to and no car to sleep in, jumping from house to house if they had an open room or a friend in common. I was very big into graffiti art and I was always writing stories in my notepads. Even under those circumstances, I was extremely content. I was cautions and very quietly observant. I always remained respectful and I always knew when I was no longer welcome and would make my leave. I met a lot of interesting people, and learned a lot. I never truly had a path, or a goal in mind until recently, which is actually quite exciting to navigate. Naturally having lived that way I’ve also seen a lot of bad, and experienced worse than I’ve witnessed. Now that I’ve settled in safety, i suppose while I’m dreaming of a goal now, I’m also battling the things I can’t seem to move past from that I’ve experienced. I don’t think I’d say I’m lost, maybe just stuck still walking in the same circles I’ve created for myself to avoid crossing the wrong paths that my mind protects me from.