50+ community Check-in April 5-8, 2021

A lovely Monday to everyone in the community and a Happy Easter to those who celebrate it

Do you have rather a past oriented focus or a present mindset? 🤔
When we look more at negative events from the past then living in the now we can get stuck on regret and beat ourselves up for all the “mistakes” we made. This prevents us from living, there is just existence. 
Since we can’t change the past, we can focus on transforming the present moment and positively impacting the future. 
Do you find yourself often using the words that define the past?
This week I like to ask you to observe how often you catch yourself saying I could have, should have, would have?
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Do you find yourself often using the words that define the past?
Not really. I live in the present and talk in the present.
This week I like to ask you to observe how often you catch yourself saying I could have, should have, would have?
Very rarely. Those are words that I almost never use.
@amiablePeace77
Do you find yourself often using the words that define the past?
I tend to be in the present. I can not worry about the past just learn from any mistakes I may have made and try not to repeat them.
This week I like to ask you to observe how often you catch yourself saying I could have, should have, would have?
I tend to do it a lot
Do you find yourself often using the words that define the past?
Yes - I know I'm not supposd to, but I can't help it. The rest of the time I daydream about things that can't come true anyway.
This week I like to ask you to observe how often you catch yourself saying I could have, should have, would have?
Okay, if I remember to do so.
@WharfRat
Hugs WharfRat, it sounds painful to be in a world which can never exist. I hope there will be an alternative for you, maybe not completely what you wish but part of it.
@WharfRat
Okay, I didn't keep an exact count, but I probably thought such phrases several times this week. I did some pretty stupid things.
Do you find yourself often using the words that define the past? - Not much anymore, I've been working on changing my mindset and such! ( Talk about a hard change)
This week I like to ask you to observe how often you catch yourself saying I could have, should have, would have? - This isn't something I ever did much, I'm not the type to regret things or try and change the past.
I applied for a job for a big company but they texted me saying that they are not receiving any messages right now, they really don't realize how much time it takes me to be encouraged and send out a job application, nor how much despair I get when I get rejected. I am treating my teeth, as I had to fill in a damaged molar that was about to dissolve, but the filling of the molar hurts badly. Finally, a date has been set for my college entrance exam for the Masters, but that appointment is two days later and it is difficult for me to prepare for it. It also corresponds to a picnic date I've been really looking forward to and no other chance to do it. It seems that neither fate nor God wants me to be happy or successful.