50+ community Weekend Check-in July 3-5, 2020
Hello everyone in the beautiful 50+ community 
How was this week for you, what was especially good or were there things you struggled with to accept? What was something new you learned this week?
Sending you all loving vibes and wishing you a great weekend 
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@amiablePeace77
How was this week for you, what was especially good or were there things you struggled with to accept? What was something new you learned this week?
This week started out badly. I was dealing with a daily listener telling me that she did hard drugs, then me telling her I didnt condone her actions, and her disappearing from 7cups. I was hurt and shocked, and still trying to figure out how I thought and felt about it, as well as what to do. At the end of the week, I had a nice conversation with another listener. I felt better after talking to him.
Something new I learned is a grounding mindfulness meditation. I sometimes have a nightmare right before I wake up and then the mood and feelings from the nightmare leave me in tears for hours. The grounding meditation helped me once. I printed it out and have it taped to a table beside my bed, ready to be used when the need arises.
@purpleTree4652
I'm really sorry you had that experience with the now ex-listener, and I understand the endless replays your brain has probably decided that you can't live without, but honestly someone who requires hard drugs to get from a to b is not best placed to help anyone.
Just my opinion. :-)
@DavidEss, no, you're absolutely right. I wasn't so much replaying what happened as trying to understand how i felt about it and why and what to do about it. I've always been around abusers and users, so it is new for me to identify their actions as not acceptable, and new for me to think that i deserve better, and new for me to see that person as being a danger to themselves and maybe others.
@purpleTree4652
And the difficulties in calling it out are real. Humans collude to maintain friendships and social groups, imo, and abusers in particular rely on others to ignore / condone the elephants in the room, to excuse and permit that behavior.
But as listeners part of reflecting the members content is to reflect the elephants present, and to break the cycle of collusion. Hopefully in a way that is seen as non-judgemental, although it is very easy for the other person (who is likely condemning themselves) to believe that you are joining in with their own self-condemnation.
That's how I see it.
@DavidEss, I'm not entirely sure what you're talking about. I did call her out on her behavior twice and the second time was the end.
@purpleTree4652
I suppose I'm just droning on about how difficult it is to do that.
:)
How was this week for you, what was especially good or were there things you struggled with to accept? What was something new you learned this week?
This week wasn't bad or good. I still waiting for what I am struggling for. I still want to learn how to increase my passion and enthusiasm towards my life.
@DinaElwy I think you hit on something we are all struggling with, finding our bliss. I think the best thing to do is do one thing every day that gives you joy or try one thing every day and see if it gives you joy. If it does, then make it part of your routine.
How was this week for you, what was especially good or were there things you struggled with to accept? What was something new you learned this week?
I had an okay week. I learned that it is more important to watch where I am going through the windshield and spend less time looking in the rear view mirror.
@soulsings
Thanks for sharing those wise words with us. I agree, life is happening right in front of us, not where we passed already.
I learned that I'm not alone, even when I feel like I am. Just have to reach out to someone.
@Lauren63 that is awesome. What an insight!
Well unhappy Fourth of July David! That is my fing banks attitude apparently since I deposited my disability check and need the money to live however my P.O.S. financial institution has decided to hold my printed B of A disability check and not release a cent until Monday after the holiday. [Profanity removed]
I'm still trying to reach out and haven't quite made the connection I need. I met with a couple of old acquaintances today for a bike ride - I've ridden alone for many years - this is the first time I've ridden with someone since the mid-1970s.
I'm meeting with another old acquaintance, who happens to also have PTSD, tomorrow. It sounds like she's much further along the road to recovery or whatever there is than I am. We will probably swap stories.
I haven't been so social in a long time.
@WharfRat wow this sounds good. Hope you are prepared for your trip and make it more social than a marathon sprint, especially if you have not been biking for a while. Just my advice that I did not heed myself LOL.
@amiablePeace77
How was this week for you, what was especially good or were there things you struggled with to accept? What was something new you learned this week?
This week for me was pretty ok, I felt relaxed for the most part of it and that was nice. I feel that something especially nice was that my dad called me and told me very nice things and nice feelings he had. I felt so relaxed after hearing his call. On the other hand during the week I had moments of nervousness and I still need to figure out exactly why. In some moments I felt nervous and almost got upset over small things that people would say. But I tried to keep calm and understand it was really nothing important. Last night it was hard for me to accept that my family were having a nice time together talking in the living room and I was sitting in my room just because I don't seem to enjoy sitting all together like they do. They're talking about things that don't always interest me so sometimes I feel bored, other times I get nervous so in the end I just gave up trying to be with others when they're sitting all together like that, I feel it's not so much for me. But it's hard for me to accept that they're having a good time while I'm sitting on my own apparently with no reason or just for my own problems. So last night I felt a little bad about that. But then I quite recovered my mood.
I'm not sure about what I've learned this week... just can't seem to think about anything to write! :)
Wishing you all a pleasant weekend!
@RinaP I hear what you are saying. I am not always in a social mood especially if I am tired or depressed. I guess sometimes I enjoy being with people even if I am not that great at small talk.
How was this week for you, what was especially good or were there things you struggled with to accept? What was something new you learned this week?
This week was really good. My fiance and I went ring shopping but didn't buy anything. I got a good idea of what she wants, and it is pretty similar to what I would like.
@Offmytrack nice to hear. A friend was in that situation recently and they went low on price of ring so had more to spend on honeymoon and setting up househoold
@soulsings Oooh, that sounds good. We just put in a bid on a house yesterday. Don't know if we'll get it or not.
@Offmytrack Today is July 7th, and today we got the house.
@Offmytrack congratulations on getting the house. yay!
Thanks @soulsings We are very happy with it.
This was a very hard week for me, decisions to be made. I read a line that said TURN BACK FEAR BEFORE IT CAN GAIN A FOOTHOLD ON YOU! That has helped me.
@impartialDrum1848
Glad you found help in this quote, do you think it would be a good idea to print it out, maybe also frame it and put it up somewhere so you can see it ?
How was this week for you, what was especially good or were there things you struggled with to accept? What was something new you learned this week?
This is week was tough. I've been avoiding a lot of things so I could mentally prepare myself for going back to work. One good thing is that I started taking better care of my skin. Although, I am struggling to accept the weight I gained.
One thing I learned is sometimes you have to live 10 mins at a time.
@modestWatermelon2938, that is so true, modest. 10 minutes at a time, and then things will look different.
@modestWatermelon2938 I agree that short term perspective helps me stay grounded. When I am really coonnected it is living one moment at a time, but that does not usually last long, but it gives me a flavor of living in the moment.
